Age when family start to look after your DC? Babysitting

[Opalfruits2]

Hi we are due in July 2021, we had a mmc last summer and this will be our first child.

My MIL looked after her first GC x1 day a week (from 7.30am to 5pm) from when he was 10 months up until 4 years old when he started school. At first was he wasn’t even walking yet and it seemed very young to have him looked after ALL day, but alas, no kids yet, what did I know?! Not my issue and of course it is his grandma so . MIL did say she was exhausted after the whole day with GC, she did and still does work full time but got one day a week off for specially for this. Fast forward to now, she’s SO excited for another GC of course. I do get on with her generally.

ANYWAY so I was talking to my mum about how it worked in DPs family as above, she was adamant that I shouldn’t leave baby with anyone for that long a period until they are at least 2...?

Curious as to what MNer’s think?

I know this will be mine and DP’s baby and ultimately our decision. I work from home, so I am in a good position when baby arrives. There is no need for my MIL to have this GC in the same fashion, but she has already started mentioning she can’t wait to have ‘this baby on a Friday again!’ and that it will be ‘our day’. Which is sweet, she is so excited. But you can see the niggling concerns I have, there will certainly need to be some boundaries as I cannot see myself leaving baby with her all day from 10 months in the same way lol sorry, especially as I do not NEED to do this!

I’m just second guessing myself as DP and I are both first time parents, he only has his side of the family to compare it to and no one else has had kids yet on my side!

Thanks in advance

Definitely a really personal thing. DD wasn’t left during the day for more than a couple of hours until she was 1 when GP’s helped with childcare before she went to nursery at 15montjs (although we did have my mum babysit for a couple of hours in the evening occasionally before then when DD was sleeping. Have only just let her sleepover at In laws when she was 2.3 due to necessity of DS arriving!

Many have to leave their babies so they can work, I was a sahm but was happy of my mil or mum wanted to have them for a few hrs when a couple months old, and mil had ds1 at about 6 months overnight so we could go out ( i bf but managed)
My parents lived further away so
Not so easy for them if they had been round corner , I would of been happy them having them from a couple months , but I trust my mum to follow my routine and rules etc ( although I don't have strict one )

I was really poorly after I had DD. I had many trips to hospital for the first 5 weeks so DD stayed with mil for a few hours each time when I was at hospital and my husband was working.

DD was a dreadful sleeper and when my sister offered to have DD overnight at 7 weeks old I jumped at the chance. Dd regularly stays with my sister overnight (childcare) and because of this she has an amazing relationship with my nephew who is a year older then DD. Dd asks for my nephew all the time 🙄. She was also sent to nursery at a year old for 3 long days a week.