Alternative to birthday candles for a 4 year old?

[ringydinghy]

Hi all. DS has his 4th birthday coming up in the next two weeks and we will be having a small celebration at home. We have ideas for his presents, special party games to play at home but I'm in a little dilemma when it comes to cake. Since the COVID pandemic, we have decided as a family to stop blowing out candles on birthday cakes, as I'm sure many other families have as well. The idea of dripping wax and spitting on a cake to be shared has always made me feel a bit uncomfortable. So we threw out all the birthday candles in the house. But I am now unsure what to do now when it comes to the cake and singing happy birthday part.

I have seen people suggest putting the candles on a cupcake, or on the birthday boy/girl's slice of cake, but I'd rather just do away with the candles thing altogether and let DS see his big special cake while we sing to him.

I was thinking sparklers but I was unsure whether they'd scare DS..and besides I think giving him a little special something to do after the happy birthday song would be nice (if he was older we'd let him cut his own cake). Any other suggestions? Or should we just sing happy birthday and go straight to cake cutting and eating

This is one of the most ridiculous and sad threads I've ever read

@ringydinghy

Ok I know people think I'm being crazy, but another big reason why I'm reluctant to do candles is when COVID is over and we hopefully have parties again, surely nobody with any memory of COVID will even consider doing candles...I guess at first desperate people will do cupcake candles/sparklers and suchlike but eventually I think people will come to realise, we don't NEED candles on birthdays. So I ideally wanted to prepare DS for the modern way.

If he continues to insist on a candle I will get him one to keep him quiet (it is his birthday after all he's so excited for this) but I'd be lying if I said I was thrilled by the idea.

I'm sorry op, I mean this as gently as possible but I find this quite chilling.

We do needs candles. We are social beings and we need to come together and celebrate life with rituals. And lighting candles, singing and blowing them out is a ritual - the only ritual perhaps - that pretty much all children in the UK have in common.

Jesus, OP... It's not the breath of death!

I'm going to give my daughter who is 3 next month some extra candles to blow out. And being as though she is a toddler, she will want to blow them again and again. And probably again. But who cares? If she has Covid, I sure as hell have Covid too!!

Stop the world I want to get off!

Kids share germs all the time, the candles are literally just the icing on the cake.
If you let them mix with other kids at a party you may as well let them eat the cake.
I also wonder if you enquire as to whether the cake was homemade or not and what food hygiene measures were in place for the making of the cake.

This is absolutely batshit. My 3 year old leaned over the table and spat in my dinner tonight. Spat right in it! I still ate it. It's your own family

Bloody traditionalists having parties at home away from health & safety oversight, just so they can have candles!

Oh also, if it's a small party we relight the candles and let all the kids have a go. Will continue to do so.

*Since the COVID pandemic, we have decided as a family to stop blowing out candles on birthday cakes, as I'm sure many other families have as well.
No I think it’s pretty much just you op.

Bit when else would it be acceptable to spit in someone else’s food?

This is so sad and beyond ludicrous. Fair enough at big parties or gatherings now people may reconsider blowing on food but if this is just your household (is it seriously?) and you hug and kiss your husband and kids then come on......

This is just sad. As in pathetic. If it matters so much, put a piece of cling film over the cake, candles on top, then after the blowing and spitting, whip the whole lot off, wax, spit and snot included, into the bin and then enjoy germ free cake.

Or you could just unclench

FFS, let the kid have candles on his cake. This is ludicrous.

Are you going to mime Happy Birthday too, as you really shouldn't be singing you know 😂

What an utterly joyless plan.

To the few families who insist on candles in your household you mean the rest of the country!

Get a grip OP. As he gets older you’re going to need it

@ElizabethG81

Are you going to mime Happy Birthday too, as you really shouldn't be singing you know 😂

You star! 😂

(are we the only family that use to try a bit of each others cake when we go out?)
Seriously at the moment I think people are concerned about things that never bothered them before? & I really wouldn't call them names as the dc may find that when eventually they do back to being normal & having parties some may choose not to have candles on cake.
So lets think constructively of alternatives; here's mine op! Salt dough make salt dough in any funny shape you choose or you think he might like have appropriate size holes for candles - dry in low oven or on radiator or airing cupboard, Paint with your dc or use felt tips for writing on place candles in, light candles & BLOWWW
Serve cake separately
problems solved
(lots of recipes for salt dough online & you can decorate same as cake if you want)

We used a small hand held fan to blow out the candles for my son recently.

Absolutely batshit. A quick Google tells me that candles on birthday cakes were first documented in 1746. Although I guess most of the people that have blown out candles since are dead now so...

If it makes you feel any better I caught Ddog tucking into my dinner yesterday after I'd nipped to the toilet. Of course I immediately thought ewww I'll bin that!... And then I realised I didn't really have much else in, the dog licks my face most days, I 'could' just push the munched bits to one side. You see where this is going 😐. I can report I'm still alive! Although unlikely to relate this to anyone I actually know IRL ever! You presumably kiss your DP and DC anyways soo....

Cover the cake really neatly with cling film pulled tightly across it and tucked under cake board/plate. Pop candles on top do the usual, blow out etc. Remove candles, remove cling film and ready to be cut.

Barely visible in photos etc.

@ringydinghy I have a just turned 4 year old, he got balloons and sparklers, but having a candle to blow out was a big deal to him 🤷‍♀️ It's such a small slice of normality in these crazy times, why so you feel the need to take that away from him?

To all the people suggesting cling film: why on earth would I cling film a cake when its just a ton easier to not do the candles at all? It's a waste of cling film, it'll mess up all the buttercream off the cake and the bottom line is DS is still doing something I don't want to encourage: spitting over food.

Even if I let him fan/wave out/fart/whatever the candles out it still opens that temptation where he could end up spitting on the cake in the future.

Lol 😂 temptation to spit on food.

Yep, I've always tried to hack up as much spit as possible and gob all over a birthday cake, you know, like you'd see footballers doing on the pitch or whatever. Anyone else remember the real slim shady, Eminem spitting over the onion rings?

FFS you're actually being ridiculous. The amount of germs he will come into contact with every time he leaves the house, especially as a young child at nursery/school is nothing compared to a sodding cake with candles on it. Do you allow him to use public toilets? Or do you dettol him every time he comes home?

Lol 😂 temptation to spit on food.
Well quite!

This obsession with spitting is so weird. Nobody spits on cake. Maybe a tiny bit of spit might come out with an exhalation of air but that's hardly the colourful picture of children up and down the land emptying the entire contents of their mouths all over their cake that OP is painting.

I'm starting to think I've been taken in by a joke post. If so excellent work OP, you totally had me.