Alternative to birthday candles for a 4 year old?

[ringydinghy]

Hi all. DS has his 4th birthday coming up in the next two weeks and we will be having a small celebration at home. We have ideas for his presents, special party games to play at home but I'm in a little dilemma when it comes to cake. Since the COVID pandemic, we have decided as a family to stop blowing out candles on birthday cakes, as I'm sure many other families have as well. The idea of dripping wax and spitting on a cake to be shared has always made me feel a bit uncomfortable. So we threw out all the birthday candles in the house. But I am now unsure what to do now when it comes to the cake and singing happy birthday part.

I have seen people suggest putting the candles on a cupcake, or on the birthday boy/girl's slice of cake, but I'd rather just do away with the candles thing altogether and let DS see his big special cake while we sing to him.

I was thinking sparklers but I was unsure whether they'd scare DS..and besides I think giving him a little special something to do after the happy birthday song would be nice (if he was older we'd let him cut his own cake). Any other suggestions? Or should we just sing happy birthday and go straight to cake cutting and eating

surely nobody with any memory of COVID will even consider doing candles...I guess at first desperate people will do cupcake candles/sparklers and suchlike but eventually I think people will come to realise, we don't NEED candles on birthdays. So I ideally wanted to prepare DS for the modern way.

The world has gone mad.

I will absolutely continue to do candles on cakes.

* I know people think I'm being crazy,*

Understatement. A epic understatement.

In fact, one of the oddest OP I have ever read.

The candles in the ring itself are usually not that wide (bigger than UK birthday cake candles, the same sort of finger size as the ones often found in the German wooden Christmas decorations that turn using the heat from candle flames, oddly ;-) ) - they'd be significantly reduced if left burning for a whole leisurely meal or child's birthday party.
You do sometimes put a massive candle in the middle and that would be the same one every year, usually each person would have their own personal big candle.

This has GOT to be a wind up. If not, stop the world, I want to get off.

We did two cakes with my DSS 4th birthday was during rule of 6 times. One shared cake we used a birthday card to fan out the candles, actually quite tricky and he found it fun! The other one did 4 x cupcakes with the candles on a board and main cake for sharing on the other board.

@itchyfinger

This has GOT to be a wind up. If not, stop the world, I want to get off.

@itchyfinger that exact phrase went through my mind earlier on when I read the OP and the follow up posts 😂

Here's a good article for those interested
www.huffingtonpost.co.uk/entry/the-disgusting-truth-about-birthday-candles-in-a-covid-19-world_uk_5f6df08ec5b6cdc24c180e82

Ok I know people think I'm being crazy, but another big reason why I'm reluctant to do candles is when COVID is over and we hopefully have parties again, surely nobody with any memory of COVID will even consider doing candles.
Of course people are going to keep having candles on cakes, don't be daft. Just get your son the candles he wants.

@BestZebbie

The candles in the ring itself are usually not that wide (bigger than UK birthday cake candles, the same sort of finger size as the ones often found in the German wooden Christmas decorations that turn using the heat from candle flames, oddly ;-) ) - they'd be significantly reduced if left burning for a whole leisurely meal or child's birthday party. You do sometimes put a massive candle in the middle and that would be the same one every year, usually each person would have their own personal big candle.

That’s exactly the candles I use in mine! Had a load left over from a German market decoration that broke

I just talk it over with DP, and he says he thinks I should give him a candle as promised, but not one he blows it. So done a bit of research and after considering sparklers and the candle ring as suggested, we made a decision.

DP found an LED happy birthday cake sign that lights up without a flame we can put on his cake for a finishing touch instead; DS is paw patrol MAD and loves chase so it will match his cake perfectly! We can tell him it's a big magic candle that he doesnt need to blow And he also gets his special magic party popper moment when we sing to him

This is completely batshit. OP, you still haven’t answered the question of how many people are going to be there and why it’s a problem to blow in front of your immediate family.

Does he go to nursery OP? How do you cope with all the germs he inevitably comes home covered in?

@Rainallnight

This is completely batshit. OP, you still haven’t answered the question of how many people are going to be there and why it’s a problem to blow in front of your immediate family.

It's just going to be us in our household at this home celebration of course: me, DP, DS and DD (who's 2) And fyi it's just not good hygiene and something I don't want to encourage to DS. Of course I'm not trying to make him a germophobe but at the same time I just think its a bit disgusting and bad manners to spit and blow over food youre going to eat, let alone everyone else's (hence why we're not even doing candles on cupcakes). To the few families who insist on candles in your household then more power to you I'm not stopping you, but it is one of the things our household have decided its for the best not to do anymore post-COVID.

It's not 'a few families' who are still going to have candles on birthday cakes. It's everyone

I do honestly think this is pretty damaging in a way. Our children have become neurotic about germs and handwashing already as a result of covid. I'd rather be trying to teach my children that actually, dirt, germs etc in moderation is perfectly ok and natural in most circumstances and actually can be helpful in many ways. Hygiene and food safety is one thing but being incredibly uptight about germs is a not really the message I would like for my kids. And this is off-the-scale uptight.

Hygiene and food safety is one thing but being incredibly uptight about germs is a not really the message I would like for my kids. And this is off-the-scale uptight.
Absolutely. This is such a ridiculous fuss over nothing.

If he's at a party post-covid where the birthday child blows out their candles as normal are you going to ban your child from eating that cake?

@bekindtome

Cling film the cake. Then unwrap and throw it away and enjoy the cake.

Do this. Problem solved.

Wow, I can’t imagine not allowing my daughter to blow out the candles on her birthday cake.

@DappledThings

Hygiene and food safety is one thing but being incredibly uptight about germs is a not really the message I would like for my kids. And this is off-the-scale uptight. Absolutely. This is such a ridiculous fuss over nothing.

If he's at a party post-covid where the birthday child blows out their candles as normal are you going to ban your child from eating that cake?

I wouldn't hold your breath on candles at a party. Most of these childrens party venues now probably wouldn't allow candles to be blown out anymore for health and safety.

But say they did somehow or if the party was hosted at home by traditionalist parents, then no of course I wouldn't I would bring DS (and DD for parties she attends) a flapjack or something to snack on just in case. If the candle was blown on a cupcake then they can have a cupcake of course.

These covid related posts are getting weirder and weirder by the day. People have seriously lost their minds. OP if only your household will be eating this cake then you've already shared germs with each other. Just let the kid have a candle on his cake, he already can't have a party or see his friends - why look for ways to make it even more joyless?

Birthday candles go out really easily so you don't have to blow a quick fan with say a birthday card will put them out you and he can even do that himself

OP your latest post is the maddest yet! Health and Safety? A flapjack? 😂 I honestly hope you look back on this in a year or two and chuckle to yourself at how mad you were being.

We "wafted" out the candles at a birthday last year by hand flapping/waving!🤣🤣🤣....but actually we were all laughing so much I'm not sure it made that much difference!

^ this was at a time when 6 friends were allowed to meet outside^ if it was only our household we would have just blown them out.

I wouldn't hold your breath on candles at a party
Ha! I'll not hold it no, I'll use it to blow out candles.

Your description of people being normal.about this as "traditionalist" is hilarious. I'm sure your son will really appreciate his slice of cake being whipped away in front of him and replaced with a flapjack.

@CeibaTree

These covid related posts are getting weirder and weirder by the day. People have seriously lost their minds. OP if only your household will be eating this cake then you've already shared germs with each other. Just let the kid have a candle on his cake, he already can't have a party or see his friends - why look for ways to make it even more joyless?

I fail to see how I'm making things joyless. Yes he will not blow out a candle but but he will have a giant party popper to set off. And a giant happy birthday flameless cake sign with flashing lights for the visual effect. It's not like we will just sing happy birthday and he stands there doing nothing in front of a bland undecorated victorian spongecake. That's the whole reason why I made this thread, to find something fun for him to do while making his wish that doesn't need candles.

Yes its different from what many had imagined doing on birthdays in the past, but these are new times and we are ready to embrace these and do things differently. And maybe doing things differently for the first time makes his birthday even MORE special?