Twins- breastfeeding or formula?

[Toddlerandtwinstobe]

Hello,

I’m after some advice!

I have a little girl, and I am about 11 weeks pregnant with twins. DD will be just 3 when they are born. It’s all a bit of a shock and I’m trying to get my head around a few things.

Breastfeeding with DD was absolutely everything to me, and planning another child I would have 100% EBF and never given formula (just a decision that I would have wanted- not that there is anything wrong with it).

However, when I found out it was twins. All I thought about was how? Without ever spending any time with my little girl again, or ever getting any kind of sleep, and possibly losing my mind through constant cluster feeding!

So part of me wants to do dummies and formula to potentially make life easier- but I’m just not sure how to come to terms with that. I’m also worried I won’t have a bond with them and that there will be health issues. DD had a cmpa so I would be scared to give them regular formula.

Just wondering if anyone had experience of this or experience of feeding twins? Whether formula or breastfeeding?

You might want to get your post moved to the multiple section, report your post to mnhq and they can do this for you.

One friend of mine who had twins whilst also having a 2 year old BF for a few weeks in the early days and then switched to formula to save her sanity.

Another has exclusively pumped for both twins and also has a 3 year old.

I think whatever works for you, or whatever you feel comfortable with is ok. Even if you're not sure of that until the babies come.

Sending you best wishes, I imagine I the a lot to take in. It took both friends a good few months to come to terms with the idea of having twins rather than a single baby.

Sorry, v conscious that mine isn't personal experience - hope it helps though.

Breastfeeding is definitely possible with twins - I know several people who ebf twins and one who combi fed. Definitely get some support now. There is a brilliant Facebook group which was set up by a lactation consultant who is herself a twin mum and specialises in feeding multiples. Lots of experienced twin mums in there who will be able to answer all your questions!

m.facebook.com/BfTwinsUk/?locale2=en_GB

They also have a website:
breastfeedingtwinsandtriplets.co.uk/

In case the link doesn’t work it’s Breastfeeding Twins and Triplets UK

Good luck OP! You can do it! 💪

I did BF my twins but they were my first and I spent an awful lot of time on the sofa under two babies. I think it would be tricky with a three year old. But maybe give it a go and see how you feel. You can switch or introduce some formula as you go along. I don’t think you need to make a hard and fast decision right now. I would say you will need to have some support for the first 6 weeks in the day to help with your DD.

Thank you @BertieBotts I’ve been looking through the multiples section but it doesn’t seem to get much traffic so thought I’d try here.

@feliznavidad2 I’m kind of leaning towards that- getting them their colostrum and then looking to move on. I think you are right thought I will have to see what the babies are like/ how the birth goes and sort of roll with it!

Amazing thanks @Peasbewithyou I’m going to join that Facebook group right now. I think it helps that I have already breastfed Dd, as I can imagine if I was a first time Mum trying to feed twins I would have given up quite quickly.

@FreeButtonBee that’s great that you fed them! Totally agree, I am trying to rope in my sister to stay with us during the summer so at least DD will have her auntie spoiling her if I am too busy with the babies for a while. Did you get one of those twin feeding pillows? Or did you feed each separately?

I only had singles but DD1 was ff from
6 weeks and DD2 ebf. On the whole bf was much easier than ff.

I'd definitely also recommend the breastfeeding twins and triplets uk Facebook group. I fed my twins until about 21 months and couldn't have coped without the advice and support from the group. I also have an older boy who was 2.4 when my twins were born. As with feeding a singleton, getting established at the start is tricky but once you've got sorted it's so much easier than dealing with formula.

I’d always recommend breastfeeding, particularly with babies who have an increased vulnerability (twins have a higher chance of preterm birth, low birth weight, low blood sugars in the immediate post natal period) there is also data that suggests an increase in the prevalence of PND with multiple births which evidence shows is decreased in breastfeeding mothers.

I’d also bare in mind that whilst the first weeks establishing breastfeeding can be difficult, once well established it includes much less prep, planning and equipment than formula feeding.

I’d invest in a stretchy wrap sling for those early weeks, pop both baby’s in, pop them on the breast then you’re hands free for playing with and managing your little girl.

My eldest daughter was 23 months when my twins were born at 35 weeks. I had BF her for one year.

I BF my twins until around a year. They both had cmpa which we only found out when we started weaning.

I will say though that the early months were very difficult. It would have definitely been easier to formula feed but given my first dd was a staunch bottle refuses I couldn't put myself through that stress again.

So it is possible but very hard work.

Congratulations I bf my dt for 13 months and had a 4 year old. I was a single parent too and felt bf would be easier than making up ff.
Routine was the key so I woke them up to feed at the same time (had a feeding cushion but it didn't work as they got bigger I found smaller cushions better).
I also expressed so that when we were out I could bf one and bottle feed the other.
Had a box of quiet things specifically for while I was feeding (for dc1) things that dc1 could do by themselves or a book I could read if they held it (I did a special beep noise so they knew when to turn the page which they loved) also independent things like a jigsaw or colouring book.
Dc1 was great and wanted to help and would often fetch things if I was incapacitated. Also dt got used to having to suddenly stop a feed and be put down.
Good luck it gets easier as they get older and definitely worth a try. I did attend a bf support group but as I was the first twin mum she'd had I gave her more advice than she gave me.
Also where you sit to feed cover with a sheet harder to catch any deposits when your other hand has another baby in it.

Some great advice thanks ladies! It’s so nice to hear of twin Mums successfully breastfeeding- and when having an older child too!

I absolutely agree with the benefits especially if they have to go to NICU and are early. My little girl went to NICU but only for the day, and I couldn’t see her. Couldn’t hand express anything so the first feed she had was formula. I do sometimes think that started her allergy. We got fobbed off by the doctor for months, giving reflux meds and told sugar water would help her colic, he said there’s no point giving up dairy but prescribed special formula . So glad I didn’t listen to him but wish I’d sorted it sooner. DH and I both have PTSD to be honest, I’ll never forget her screams. I’m so scared these babies will have colic! I will be giving up dairy in the third trimester, and if we do give formula and there is any hint of discomfort I will definitely demand a prescription milk.

DD was a difficult baby but ultimately what saved me from any depression was breastfeeding, because we had such an amazing bond. So I agree with a PP who made a comment that it can help, I definitely think in a lot of cases it does.

I think the hard thing about twins is I feel like I’m totally clueless all over again! I thought I would know what I’m doing this time but because now there’s going to be too I feel like I just have no idea. I have been waking up in the middle of the night feeling so anxious!

The great thing about subsequent babies is that you’re already, subconsciously, good at routine and prioritising. Allow yourself to accept that the first weeks are going to be filled with too much tv, too many nappies and far too many biscuits - and that’s ok.

You can absolutely do this, not only that, you’ll be pro within weeks.

I'm a huge advocate of BF - sound very similar to how you were with your first DD.

But twins is another ball game I'm sure. And I think for yourself it's going to be a big benefit for the new babies to be able to take a bottle. (Mine never could as I EBF)

Do you have many breastfeeding links from your first born? Any way you could find someone who could donate you some expressed milk to bottle feed and then you may be able to get in the swing of pumping yourself?

In the BF support group I used to visit a couple of the mummies there were pumping for others while BF their own babies.

I had the my Brest friend cushion and fed them tandem practically every feed. They were dinky little things though so fitted til they were 11 months. I couldn’t have managed without it - even fed them on a ferry using it 😄

It is absolutely possible but I know a lot of other twin mums and very few who EBF, none of them had older children either. Not trying to be discouraging, just honest about my experiences.

I was desperate to bf my twins but things did not go to plan - emergency section, straight to NICU, NG feeding and IV nutrition. I started expressing them pumping with a manual then double pumping with a hospital pump. When DT1 came home at 17 days he still had an NG tube in as I couldn’t get him to latch properly - every time he latched it was agony and most of the milk would fall out of his mouth. NG tube kept coming out, etc. Ended up going back into NICU after he had been home a couple of days and they just handed me formula and a teat. DT2 exactly the same latching issues.

Looking back I am certain both had tongue ties but we had much bigger issues to deal with at the time. I kept pumping and felt too guilty to stop but had to keep pumping every 2 hours as my supply was low. Eventually stopped at 7 months and wish I had stopped sooner.

The fact that you’ve breastfed before will be a massive help, but much more challenging when you can’t just pop both in a sling and let them feed while caring for an older child.

It’s doable if you really want to, and can get any support needed - I probably could have fed directly if I’d had the right support but it wasn’t there and at the time I didn’t have the energy or time to battle for it.

My twins were my first children, so I had to learn how to BF, however once established it was fairly easy. We did move on to one formula or expressed bottle feed a day fairly early, so that DP could be involved, and I could get more than 90 minutes continuous sleep once every 24 hours. Thankfully apart from a couple of brief periods when one was poorly and the other wasn't, they most stayed on the same schedule. There are various ways of arranging yourself and the babies so everyone is comfortable. My local TAMBA group gave me some support (this is nearly 22 years ago though!)

@PinkyU Thank you for your lovely comment! I definitely think our little girl broke us in nicely to parenthood, so anything better than a baby that cries 80% of the day is going to feel pretty good to us!

@SinkGirl thank you for sharing your experience, I’m sorry you didn’t get more support! That sounds really rough. Don’t worry about being discouraging- I want as much info as possible. I think because I’ve breastfed before I’m realistic. I think if I accept now that formula is a big possibility, then it will be much easier for me to come to terms with if we mix feed etc. did you have a double pump? I have a single medela but it is very time consuming so wondering whether to invest in a double.

Looking at a brest friend cushion and it’s going on my twin baby buy list!

I’m moving soon to a little village, there is a children centre down the road so I really hope they will have one of the twin support groups.

Can’t help with breast feeding twins unfortunately but I know a lot about allergy’s son has multiple allergy’s and there’s a lot of evidence to show eating allergy foods during pregnancy prevents allergy’s so I’d definitely have a look into that before removing dairy

I had twins and my son was 2 and a half when they were born. I had breastfed him until just under a year old. When the twins came, we had to stay in hospital for 3 weeks due to them learning to feed and grow. When we were allowed to go home, I was breastfeeding and pumping to keep supply up. At 6 weeks though, I decided to move them over to formula. I felt so bad for my son as all my time was taken up feeding the twins. Moving on to formula was great as he could help feed them, which he absolutely loved. It worked so much better for our family so I was happy with the decision. I think you just need to do what is right for your family and not feel too pressured either way. Good luck. Twins are great!!!

I think if you had a successful experience of feeding your elder daughter it will really help you in feeding twins. It is a bit crazy for the early weeks because feeding them separately does take a lot of time but when they develop some neck strength tandem feeding is more of an option. I found it hard to tandem feed in bed but it much easier on the sofa. My method involved a lot of pillows. I did some mixed formula and breast feeding from about 12 weeks I think and the babies seemed to cope pretty well switching between the two. It's worth seeing how it goes.

I don’t know much about b feeding twins, but I do know about b feeding a newborn with a 2.2 year old. I think after 6 weeks b feeding gets easier and then again at 3 months.

My 2.2 year old became my slave- getting baby’s nappies, wipes, clothes etc. He really enjoyed the role. Also TV sounds like a plan! The cluster feeding happened for me mostly at night so hopefully your 3 year old will be in bed. Will she be at nursery at all? My little boy is still to go, but I assume you will have 15 hours free?

I think it is doable, but sounds hard with twins. I wouldn’t worry about your 3 year old too much- she will adjust

I wasn't able to breastfeed my twins so used formula. It was great because my husband was equally involved and we could feed one each at the same time. When I was by myself I still fed one at a time so I got that one on one time with them. Never had any issues.

@Fatas I can see DD being like that! She adores babies. She plays with her dolls all day, putting them to bed/ in their pram/ putting on nappies! She is already at a great age I think, getting very independent. Can go to the toilet by herself and will take herself off for a nap, so I hope by the time they are born she will love being my little right hand girl. I work 3 days a week at the moment, so she does 3 full days at nursery. I think we will keep it unless she gets upset and wants to stay home for the odd day. She loves nursery and is very active so it’s great for her.

@BiggerBoat1 glad to hear you had a good experience with formula. DH not being able to feed them does scare me. I was up so much with DD and had to co sleep from 4 months to 11 months as she fed all night. I don’t think he understands what that is actually like!

It’s probably best to play it by ear, but after a week or so you could maybe combi feed, once your milk is established. That way you get the best of both worlds. Then you could decide to b feed a bit more later on when they feed less