Could this be 4 month regression

[Laylor]

Someone give me strength. We are absolutely knackered

Baby has always been a bad sleeper but last two nights have been truely awful.

First night - bed at 7pm, dream feed at 10pm, feed at 1 which us super early and then up thrashing about every 20 or so minutes for the next 4 or 5 hours. Bit of sleep here and there.

Last night - as above but slept until fed about 230 ish then shouting/cooing until I got him up at 645

He will not nap for longer than 30 mins in his moses basket in the day time. He will however sleep on us all day if we let him.

He is drinking a little bit more. Last night 2 oz more.

Over last few weeks hes has been super fussy on the bottle. It's like he would rather do anything else than eat. He is constantly moving his head side to side and looking around.

Does this sound like the dreaded 4 month regression. Baby is 17 weeks tomorrow x

Sounds likely, has he become more alert and mobile during the day? Alternatively bad daytime sleep means bad nighttime sleep especially after 1am when their sleep gets lighter. At this age he needs 12 hours night and about 3 hours day. I'd make him sleep more during the day even if it means in a sling or on you (if possible). That may help you.

Thanks zoo keeper. I honestly think he really suffers with lack of sleep as he yawns all day every day. He is very alert and smiles/laughs all day long just wish he would sleep better.

We have no routine with feeding and napping and just go along with baby. I thought he could have about 2 hours awake time but perhaps I'm reading the weing signals.

I would sit with him on me all day if I could bit people tell me not too because I'm making a rod for my own back and all that x

You cannot spoil a baby. Mine napped in my arms until she was 5 months and then took all her naps in the cot quite happily. Sleep is more important at this stage than worrying about where she's having it. Let him sleep in the sling if you want your hands free.

Thankyou. That's what my health visitor says. I just read everywhere about sleep associations and self settling at such a young age and feel like maybe I should be doing that.

Listen to your HV - she sounds unusually sensible!

Worry about sleep associations when your baby's sleep matures after this crucial developmental stage.

Laylor I could written this. My usually good sleeper has become an absolute monster. I used to be able to put him down drowsy and with a dummy and he'd get himself off to sleep, but not anymore. I think hes dropped a mid-morning nap and has extended his awake time and is a nightmare as a result.

@Letsallscreamatthesistene how old is your little one? Honestly I've had a 3 day headache. My husband returns to work tomorrow for the first time in 4 months. Dreading it. X

Hes 12 weeks old, I thought maybe a bit young for a sleep regression but I read somewhere that it can happen anywhere between 3-5 months. It definitely puts me off a second.....

@Letsallscreamatthesistene haha yea me too. I had an awful pregnancy too and was in and out of hospital. Only bit that didnt bother me was the pushing him out bit. Yes I read about it starting earlier than 4 months. X

Oh my gosh, my baby is exactly the same atm!!

The thrashing is driving me insane. Honestly having a live salmon in the next to me would be quieter. It’s exhausting. My DH sleeps through it but I just can’t

My LO doesn’t eat during the night any more (dream feed around 9 then ‘sleeps’ until 6) so initially I thought the thrashing meant he was hungry so I woke him up, fed him....and he thrashed even more!! So last night I didn’t bother and he actually thrashed less?!

He used to do this when he was a newborn so I’m guessing it’s his version of a sleep regression. Most frustrating part is because he is asleep when he’s doing it, there isn’t anything I can do! At least if he woke up I could feed, soothe, etc

He just stopped doing it when he was younger one wonderful day - I’m hoping that day will come again soon!!! Any tips on how to stop this without swaddling?

He sleeps okay in the day, but in a sling :)

I know you asked for tips without swaddling, but I found the Love To Dream 'swaddles' amazing. They're sort of a half way house between swaddling and a natural sleeping position.

@Eggcellent29 I detached the next to be crib from the bed last night and put the side up and it helped a little bit. Baby would thrash about and hit me If I slept too close. If I turned over i would disturb him and if my husband snores he disturbs us both. Hes about a foot away from the bed. He would be so much better in his own room so roll on 7 weeks.

Baby has his eyes closed too but surely he csnt be having effective sleep through all the thrashing. X

I moved my baby to his own room at 8 weeks and things were so, so much better

@Letsallscreamatthesistene really? How? Did you wake each other up too? Xx

Hes a really noisy sleeper, and kept being disturbed by us. We were disturbed by him. Nobody was getting any sleep.

I also firmly believe that putting in his own room, in his own cot has led to a really good and effective bedtime routine

That's what we are like over night. It's so hard work but I dont feel confident putting him in his own room. Last night we did shifts just to get some sleep. He slept miles better and only woke up a handful of times for his dummy. Although from 415 he was wide awake and catnapping. I wonder if hes teething. His cheek is always flushed, dribbles loads and aggressively chews his hands. His mittens are soaked in a morning. If I go anywhere near his mouth he tries to bite it. I thought he may be hungry at first but he hasnt done that since my breastfeeding days. Could teething be causing this? X

I could have written this when my DS was the same age, it's so tiring and I feel for you. All I can say is that almost all the babies in our NCT group went through the same phase at roughly the same age and while it was rough, it passed for all of them.

It does sound like it could be teething if his little cheek is red. Could you give painkillers and see if that makes the sleep better while he's so red and chewy?

I do think this is a phase that just needs to run its course, but I agree with PP that daytime naps are really important. I wouldn't stress too much about HOW you achieve it until this phase has passed.

Also, when he's thrashing is he actually upset or is he just having a good wriggle? If it's the latter, could you just leave him to it and try to snooze yourself? I think mine was rather active at night at around this age, I assumed it was to do with getting ready to roll.

Thanks @shreddednips when I look at him his eyes are closed. He lifts his legs really high then smashes them down its soooooo loud. He is always at his face which could again be related to teething.

Baby napped on me yesterday and today and last night he slept much much better.

I think I will try with the calpol tonight to see if that helps. Would you give it at the start if the night or when he wakes up in the night?

He is hitting all his milestones x

@Taylor oh my I could've wrote this myself. My daughter is 4 months 19 weeks and is just the same. Especially slamming her legs down in her cot so so loud! Last night she woke up every 2 hours. We have to hold her at nap times in the day or she wakes instantly! Shes my 3rd and I generally cant remember my other 2 being this hard

Little noisy monsters. The sleepless nights are hard. How often does your baby feed in the night x

I'd give it before bed and then if he wakes in the night and is upset (assuming it's been 4 hours). My chap definitely did the slamming his legs around thing, I think it passed when the regression did. Does he look like he's about to start rolling/hit another big milestone? I've found that very active sleep usually comes before they start doing something new.
Really hope the sleep improves for you soon!

He is definitely teething I'm pretty sure of it. He rolled the other day at the hospital but the bed was on slight incline so it was in his favour. Hes pulling his legs right up so perhaps it's near but I cant be too sure. I feel exhausted today. Its first day husband has gone back to work since he was born so weve had a slobby day but it makes you feel worse. I need to start planning my days better I think. Get outdoors and active x

Oh you poor thing, it's exhausting. Getting out and about might be a good thing for his sleep, my totally unscientific observation is that plenty of daylight helps with sleep. Bet he's about to start rolling. My DS was TERRIBLE for a couple of weeks recently and then started walking! It was the same with crawling.

Have you got the Wonder Weeks app? It was spookily accurate for DS, it predicts their tricky phases and, comfortingly, tells you when they're likely to come out of it 🤣

Yes I had the app but couldnr get my head around it. It saved leaps in my calendar and messed everything up. He started smiling and laughing at a very young age and seems to be hitting milestones sooner than others. Dont know if I'm just thinking that cause I'm his mum though

I read that they pull there legs up and away before rolling. He dosent do the swaying but defo the pulling his legs up.

I cant wait for him to hit milestones like that but in other ways I want him to stay stationary as I can barely get anything done as it is.

Did you have a routine at this age? We only have a very loose bath. Massage. Bottle and bed routine, no specific time just what ever fits in around naps and bottles. My health visitor told me not to introduce proper routine until about 1 year and just be led by baby. If he woke at the same time every morning I could probably implement a little routine but hes soooo unpredictable. X