Could this be 4 month regression

[Laylor]

Someone give me strength. We are absolutely knackered

Baby has always been a bad sleeper but last two nights have been truely awful.

First night - bed at 7pm, dream feed at 10pm, feed at 1 which us super early and then up thrashing about every 20 or so minutes for the next 4 or 5 hours. Bit of sleep here and there.

Last night - as above but slept until fed about 230 ish then shouting/cooing until I got him up at 645

He will not nap for longer than 30 mins in his moses basket in the day time. He will however sleep on us all day if we let him.

He is drinking a little bit more. Last night 2 oz more.

Over last few weeks hes has been super fussy on the bottle. It's like he would rather do anything else than eat. He is constantly moving his head side to side and looking around.

Does this sound like the dreaded 4 month regression. Baby is 17 weeks tomorrow x

I did have a routine, but I'm a routine person. It was flexible (as in, I wouldn't wake him up at a particular time and I would put him down as soon as he looked tired instead of 'bedtime' if you see what I mean). But we had a sort of loose structure, your health visitor is sensible though IMO because their needs change so much depending on growth spurts etc.

The main thing I did was make sure he was never awake too long in the day, and then I made sure we did the same things every time I put him down to sleep (if he wasn't sleeping in his pushchair etc). Our routine was in the bag, he now starts yawning as soon as he sees the bag like Pavlov's dog, then curtains drawn and white noise on. Then a 5 minute cuddle in the dark so he knew it was sleep time. So nice and bright as soon as he's awake, dark for sleep. I do think mini routines like that help as opposed to a set structure for sleep/wake times. Although now at 18 months DS does follow a clockwork structure, but it all gets more predictable once they're a bit older I think.

We also swaddled which helped massively, but I think by 4 months he didn't want it any more.

It sounds like you're doing all the right things. It feels like forever but it will pass, I seem to remember it was over very suddenly!

He was waking up every hour last night. We are shattered. But I'm in a much better place today that I was yesterday. I think we are going to take him out of his next to me and move his big cot in to the bedroom and try that. He bangs his hands in the side so not sure if that disturbs him perhaps. It's always after his 4am bottle hes the worst though. Last night he was shouting for up to an hour. We were just led in bed listening to him. He went off to sleep eventually.

When you have day time naps do you pop him in his sleeping bag too or just for bed x

Oh gosh, sorry it was so awful last night 😩 mine used to bang his head against the side, it was dreadful!

I put him in his sleeping bag and in the cot for naps, just the same as for bed. I have really thin ones just made out of thin muslin for Summer, he doesn't like going to bed uncovered.

Cot sounds a great idea, maybe a bit more room will help?

I dont want to put him in his cot for naps as I'm worried about the sids guidelines. Downstairs in his basket he wont sleep longer than 30 mins so I've been holding him but he flecks about loads and still dosent seem well rested. I think hes struggling to link his cycles x

Oh I see, yes I remember linking cycles being a problem at this stage. I'll put my thinking cap on, I seem to remember that once he managed to take longer naps it sorted itself out.

I think we did the baby whisperer pat and shush thing when he woke up after a very short nap to settle him back down. I didn't do anything else from the book but that particular technique worked for DS.

Thanks. Your ever so helpful. When he gets to 30 minutes he will wake up wether in my arms or basket. Only when hes in my arms I can get him in to next cycle. In his basket is something else. I honestly think this is why his bed time sleeping is so bad cause hes constantly over tired. I know they say to look for the signs of tiredness such as yawning but he yawns alllllll the time so he would be asleep all day x

No problem, I know how tough it is. Maybe let him sleep on you then and see if there's an improvement? I know it's hard though when you're pinned down by a baby for ages at a time. Would he sleep in a sling so you can move around?

I have two slings. A cotton one and a bjorn one and I cant get on with either. I've just tried the Bjorn one on again but faced him forward and it felt okay. X

I used to use one of those wrap ones because you can tie them so that they stop the head flopping around when they're sleeping, but they're a bit fiddly to tie. Does he sleep in the pram?

Yeah but again only 30 mins. Honestly I go go and leave him alone for 30 mins and come back and he would be fine. Obviously I wouldnt but he is like clock work x

I'd say ignore all that 'Rod for your own back' nonsense and follow your instincts. Both my children had their naps in my arms or the moving pushchair. DD2 still does and she is coming up to 7 months. DD1 is a great sleeper now so all the people that told me I was doing it wrong, were wrong! :)

Thank you. Do you believe in all that self settling and linking cycles or is this something they manage on their own?

I have never done the self settling thing. DD1 had naps with me until she stopped needing them. And she just naturally went through the night on her own not long after she turned one. I know a lot of people recommend cry it out (or so called more gentle methods) but I don't believe in them myself. I think it's a natural milestone that children reach on their own providing they have good routine etc. Just my opinion but it worked for me. Hopefully it wasn't just luck and DD2 will follow in her sister's footsteps haha!

Thankyou. There is no way I'd do the cry out method. Hes only had 60 mins nap today which I'm hoping is down to the regression or teething x

I did do self settling but we used the gradual retreat method, so started off just getting him to nod off with me patting him then gradually giving less support until he could do it on his own. I never left him to cry for long periods, but he was much older when we started (at least 8 months I think). At 4 months I did teach him to fall asleep in his cot, but with my hands on him soothing him, which took a while. The whole process took a long time, my friends who did controlled crying had very quick results but I just didn't feel it was right for us.

Oh my god @shreddednips baby just woke up for first time since 7am. Well he stirred twice but settle straight back down. No thrashing, no banging legs etc. Numeroua factors though- either or was the calpol before bed even though I gave it him the night before and he slept worse or the fact hes in a bigger bed with a softer mattress. I dont care though cause he slept. Hes done 7 hours or so I'm most pleased!! Sorry to write at this very how awful hour. X

Yay I'm so glad for you! I hope it continues, fingers crossed the cot is the solution!