Should I wake 7 week old for feeds?

[newmum234]

How much sleep should a 7 week old baby be getting during the day (i.e. 7am-7pm) and should I be waking him for feeds if he goes too long? Are babies like adults in that the more they sleep in the day, the less they’ll sleep at night? DS has generally been fairly good at going down for the night, but yesterday after his 10pm feed he wouldn’t settle until about 12.30am, then needed feeding again as usual at 2am. I’m exhausted!

Is he bf or ff?

Also, I’d like to establish a (very loose and very flexible) routine for him if I can. Can anyone suggest an evening/nighttime routine that could work? At the moment he feeds around 6pm, then naps in the sling with us while we have dinner and watch telly in the lounge. At 9.30-10pm I take him into the bedroom, wake him and give him another feed before putting him in his cot for the night (and I go to bed at this point too). I’d like to squeeze a regular bath in there somewhere but not sure when would work best!

@Lockdownseperation thanks for the reply - he’s ff

babies are actually the opposite to adults - the more quality sleep the get in the day, the better they sleep at night. It's a 24-hour thing rather than day and night until they get to around 4 months.

Your baby is still tiny but you can definitely have a little bit of structure and routine to the days.

I would suggest something like this
7am bottle
8.30-10am nap
10.30am bottle
11.30-1.30pm nap
2pm bottle
3-4.30pm nap
5pm bottle
6pm bath
6.30pm bed (I put my baby to bed at this time with the monitor but I know a lot of people keep their baby next to them, it can result in more disrupted sleep though)
10pm bottle in a dark very quiet place with minimal interaction
Then your baby might wake again 1-2 times in the night but that is normal. Night waking will reduce a lot in the next few weeks.

Sorry I meant to say you do another bottle or top up after the bath at 6pm. This is called a split feed. Then your baby is having 4-5 bottles a day plus the night feeds.

Firm believe in just letting them sleep when they want.
There were some days DS would slept 7 hours in the day, and some only a few hours.
He would need feeding every 2 hours on the dot though day and night till at least 4 months

Night wakings will reduce a lot

For some, but I would say equally the same amount of people it won't so don't feel 'worried' it baby is waking lots through the night

That’s really helpful, thanks @GenevaMaybe! Why do you suggest the split feed around bath time out of interest?

I would like to put DS down in his cot at 6.30pm, but I’m not sure he would sleep without me in the room - he’s become quite clingy this last week.

@GenevaMaybe also would you wake him for feeds if he’s sleeping, or wait until he wakes up to feed?

I wouldnt bother with a routine in the day just yet. Equally I wouldnt try to attached a routine to timings.

The only 'routine' I would do is bath, bottle, bed. For me this is anywhere between 6pm and 7.30pm and is dependant on when hes woken from his last daytime nap. I also actually put him to bed in his cot and have a video baby moniter, but I know others wont like to do this. Ive done this 'routine' since about 8 weeks old, but just shifted the timings depending on him. He goes down really well at night now, and will wake for a feed sometimes between 12-2am, then again at 4-5am. He'll be up for the day at 7.30, although sometimes he decides he wants to be awake from 5am!

I also dont wake him for feeds.

Also agree with PP - good daytime sleep equates to good night sleep

@Letsallscreamatthesistene that sounds ideal! Was that his routine at 8 weeks too (bed around 6.30, waking for feeds at 12-2 and 4-5), or did it take a while to establish that?

Last week your baby was 6 weeks. That is a known growth period. They suddenly feed more and it can be relentless. It helps to research these periods as there are others coming and it really helps you when you realise it's normal and a good thing and not just some horrible exhausting mystery.

I did something very similar to what @GenevaMaybe has suggested and it worked really well for us. Reduced a lot of the anxiety for both of us and we knew what was coming and when. Also, making sure that baby has at least 5 or 6 bottles during the day will give you a better chance for longer stretches at night. Mine started going 7-7 at 13 weeks or so, so certainly not impossible and it didn't involve any sort of cry it out.

So far today DS has been fed at 7am and went to sleep at around 8am in his cot. He’s been asleep ever since but now seems to be stirring!

Thanks @MrsLully. Did you wake your baby in order to stick to those timings, or did you just feed when he/she woke up naturally? I would prefer not to wake him and let him sleep/wake naturally if I can.

I'd wake for feeds in the day and leave them be at night.

I wasn't a big fan of 'routine'. Your baby will fall into their own rhythm and they will stick to that regardless of how you you try to shoe horn them into suiting you. I never did bath time before bed because my DC were always unsettled at night if we did. They don't need washed-up every day at this stage either unless you have a very sicky baby.

I didn't start putting my DC up to bed in the cot with DH and I downstairs until nearer 3 months. Mine were no where near ready to settle for the night at 7pm at that age either. It was closer to 10pm, shifted to 9pm, shifted to 8pm and then settled around 7pm. You will get your child free evenings back, but it wasn't until about the four month mark I could reliably put my two down that early upstairs on their own.

I used to either have them downstairs with us until we went to bed, or I would put them down in their cot and sit and watch TV in bed. If your baby usually settles around 10pm, get yourself away to bed then too. For the first few months follow their sleep pattern. With my youngest, I went to bed around 8pm when my eldest did, DH did the evening shift and last feed around 10/11pm. He'd go to bed for the evening then and I'd get up for any night feeds. If the baby woke around 5am before DH had to go to work, he'd do that one as well. So I could at least get a solid chunk of unbroken sleep.

I understand where you're coming from. I tried to do the whole routine thing with my first at this stage. It didn't end well. I also didn't listen to everyone who gave me the same advice I've just given you! With my youngest, I was much more chilled out, wasn't in a rush to 'get back to normal' and happy to go with the flow to get through each day. There is an end in sight. My two dropped the 2/3am feeds around 9 weeks and would sleep 10pm-5am. Probably doesn't sound much, but it makes a huge difference having those hours of unbroken sleep.

I found I just went with my babies own routine. For the first 6 weeks she's fed 2 hourly and then gradually had longer between feeds. If there's no problem with weight gain then do wake baby to feed. We have had a similar routine for little one since she was born re bath, milk and bed. It was originally later (around 8ish) and as she's got older 10.5month she has her bath around 6/half 6 and then bed for 7/half 7.
I find as they get older their needs and routines change xx

*don't wake baby for feeds

When he was 8 weeks bedtime was a little earlier by an hour or so, then we made it later when it was very clear my son didnt want to go to bed that early anymore. He's only been waking for feeds at those times at night for the last week or so. He very gradually dropped them.

I agee with PP about not trying to impose your own routine on them. My son kind of fell into his own routine and we went with him.

Also with regards to feeding during the day, I feed on demand, but he asks for food every 2-3hrs. I feel like this is important as he'll be getting most of his calories during the day.

My two dropped the 2/3am feeds around 9 weeks and would sleep 10pm-5am.

So you were getting 7 hrs of unbroken sleep from 9 weeks? That is incredible, I hope the same happens to me!

EASY routine works for very little babies, due to its baby led (but predictable) nature.

E = Eat (a feed)
A = Awake time
S = Sleep
Y = You time (while baby sleeps).

Its a cycle, rather than a by-the-clock routine. It allows predictability with predictable awake times - an estimate for this age would be 30-60 minutes. So when baby wakes jup, you have a clear idea when the next nap needs to be and feed in that window.

I wouldn't wake baby to feed during the daytime - unless you have been advised to for medical reasons.

Start-to-end EASY cycle for this age might be 2h, maybe 3h (very child dependant), which means feeds end up being every 2-3h as baby is fed upon waking.

Some key thing with regards to baby's routines:

More sleep = Better sleep
An over tired baby will have lighter and more unsettled sleep. A baby getting ample sleep will sleep more deeply.

More daytime calories = Less night time calories needed
The more you feed baby in the day, the less baby will need at night. That doesn't necessarily mean more milk in the bottle. You could feed more frequently (say every 2h from 7am-11pm) rather than bigger volumes of milk in one go.

Milk can sometimes = Comfort
Many families use milk as a source of comfort when baby is crying, but not hungry. That is OK in itself (feeding on demand definitely recommended). But bear in mind that baby wanting milk might not mean baby is hungry.

@newmum234 My little boy is 6 weeks are our routine is

6am to 7am wake up feed and play
8:30am to 9am dress and ready for day
9am to 9:30am feed
9:30 to 10am sleep for about 2hrs to 3hrs sometimes longer
The rest of the day he feeds on demand and we go for a walk he will sleep throughout the day and normally has another 30mins playtime
7pm naked play time we take him upstairs and strip him off amd let him kick about on changer for 10mins naked
7:15pm bath
7:30 feed
8pm cuddles with me
8:30pm in cot
9pm he is sleep
10pm feed
4am feed he sleeps 5 to 6hrs before he wants feeding
6am awake and start day again

Hope this helps, its good to get a good bath and bed routine in place early on x

So you were getting 7 hrs of unbroken sleep from 9 weeks? That is incredible, I hope the same happens to me!

Entirely possible with a formula fed baby. My exclusively FF child (DC3 of 4) was not waking between 10.30-7am from 4 weeks old. I dropped the 10.30pm feed at 7 weeks and by 8 weeks old was not waking between 7pm-7am. He slept through from then onwards.

Not so lucky with my other 3 children though!