Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

Please or to access all these features

Parenting

For free parenting resources please check out the Early Years Alliance's Family Corner.

Why didn't I check on him earlier?!

46 replies

Littlefrog99 · 31/05/2020 23:10

I've just had an awful experience and despite coming to bed shattered, I now don't feel like I can sleep.

DS is 3yo and goes to bed at 7pm, he usually takes an hour or so to settle and fall asleep. Once he's asleep we check on him and take toys off his bed, etc. Tonight DP is at work and I've been chatting to my sister so I didn't do my usual check. I've come up to bed to find him inside his duvet cover, under the duvet and kind of twisted in it. He was so hot i could feel the heat coming from him before I even touched him. He was sweating so much his pj's are soaking and his lips were blue. I literally had to climb onto his bed and tear him out of the covers as he was so wrapped up. He's fine now but I could kick myself for not checking on him earlier. I'm trying not to think of the "what ifs".

God, both of my children almost died during their births, my daughter had multiple episodes where we weren't sure if she was going to make it and I only said to my sister tonight that today is the first time I actually feel like it's all in the past and I can finally relax and move on. Would it be selfish to take him out of his bed to sleep with me? It's not a long term solution and he'd wonder what the heck was happening but I'd feel better for it.

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
loutypips · 31/05/2020 23:13

Do it.
How scary for you. I always check on my daughter before I go to bed, and if I forget I can't sleep until I go in there.
I'd do it for peace of mind, but you still may not sleep well.

MistressGammon · 31/05/2020 23:15

You poor thing, what a horrible shock, definitely bring him in with you if you’ll sleep easier for it.

TARSCOUT · 31/05/2020 23:17

You've had a fright but everything is ok. Do what you need to make you feel better but don't blame yourself.

Interested in this thread?

Then you might like threads about these subjects:

MrsTerryPratchett · 31/05/2020 23:19

Try to breathe. He's fine.

You can get quilts with no covers that you just wash the whole thing. If it would make you feel better.

What a shock you poor thing.

Ohnoherewego62 · 31/05/2020 23:20

You poor thing. How awful.

I check mines every hour or so when she goes to bed but that's because she literally ends up in all positions cause she moves so much and I fear exactly what your scenario was tonight.

Deep breaths and lots of love to you and your boy.

ThisNameIsDifferentFromTheLast · 31/05/2020 23:27

We've a wiggler and have found this bedding tonne very helpful.

Impossible to get wrapped up in it, makes it harder to fall out. The duvet can be taken out in hotter weather.

gro.co.uk/product/gro-to-bed/

AnneLovesGilbert · 31/05/2020 23:29

God, you poor thing.

Get him. Cuddle him. Hope you get some sleep.

FeelinFagin · 31/05/2020 23:29

What a scare! You poor thing.

I have a very vivid memory of getting stuck under the covers at Gran's house as a child. She was old fashioned and used to tuck the sheet, eiderdown and blanket firmly under the mattress and I had somehow moved down the bed and I couldn't get out. It was terrifying. Thankfully my Uncle rescued me. He was checking on all the kids (all the cousins were sleeping over that night)

Definitely get your boy in your bed and make yourself feel better. My DS is in with me now cos DH is on nights and I can't resist free snuggles with my 8 year old!

gamerchick · 31/05/2020 23:34

Ah do it OP. You've had a fright and I'm sure he won't mind. Flowers

Littlefrog99 · 31/05/2020 23:37

My heart is still racing. I always, always check on them once they're asleep and a couple of times during the night as DD still has night feeds. I try so hard not to be a neurotic parent. We were just unlucky with what happened in their early days and I know its completely irrational but I can't help but feel like I tempted fate earlier by saying they're both doing great, I can finally sit back and not worry about if they're going to die. Rediculous I know but it's really unnerving.

OP posts:
Littlefrog99 · 31/05/2020 23:41

Thank you so much for the info on the cover-less duvets. I never knew they existed! I'll definitely be ordering one.

OP posts:
Starcup · 31/05/2020 23:47

Aww bless you, what a fright you would have got. He will be none the wiser and dream land fast asleep.

Littlefrog99 · 01/06/2020 06:26

It took me ages to fall asleep and DS woke up at 5am, took himself back off to his own bed looking rather confused. Strong, sweet coffee should see me right today.

Thanks for your input, kind words and advice. It certainly helped to bring my anxiety levels down. Blooming kids. They are my absolute pride and joy but they don't half cause us stress.

OP posts:
SpillTheTeaa · 01/06/2020 06:31

So glad he is okay.
DS is still in with me and I'm constantly checking him. If I wake up and my back is to his cot I freak out.
Everytime I wake up I wake in a panic that I haven't checked DS. Currently sat here watching him sleep like a stalker

NameChangedToProtect1 · 01/06/2020 06:43

Oh dear sorry to hear you've had a fright. They are quite robust by 3 story not to worry too much. Put the duvet poppers at the feet end. Generally they will wake up and holler if there is an issue.

Littlefrog99 · 01/06/2020 06:58

I completely get it @SpillTheTeaa. Pre-kids I used to think parents who did things like that we're a bit over protective but here I am 3 years into it and finding I'm just the same. Worse sometimes!

OP posts:
katmarie · 01/06/2020 07:01

I have video monitors in both my kids rooms, because I was disturbing them when I checked on them in the night. It means i can have a quick look any time, may be worth considering op?

Doggodogington · 01/06/2020 07:12

I still check on my two before I go to bed, they are 12 and 8. The 8 yo is always in some random position where we have to rearrange him, take his toys out, take his jangly elf slippers off his feet or hands out of his socks Grin
I can imagine it was really scary but you did go up and he’s fine now. Just check on him earlier until he’s a bit older. Kids love to keep you on your toes Wink

sashh · 01/06/2020 07:14

How scary OP but it was fine. Stop thinking 'what if...' well try to stop thinking that, your little boy is fine, you DID check him and you did untangle him, that's what checks are for.

dottiedodah · 01/06/2020 07:16

What a shock for you. Thankfully all OK now, Try not to blame yourself Children are like little eels! The cover less duvets sound great .Have a nice big cup of coffee and dont worry (not easy I know) Maybe take the cover off for the time being, and just pop his duvet over him until the new one arrives .

userabcname · 01/06/2020 07:16

Kids!! I swear mine are turning me prematurely grey!! Sounds scary but he was fine. Definitely agree about the video monitors. Also if it's warm in your house at the mo maybe just switch to a sheet as a covering? Our house is baking right now so both my boys just have a thin covering - sheet for 3yo and muslin tucked in for 7mo.

Tolivebytheseaahh · 01/06/2020 07:22

Aww this brought back a child hi d memory. I was about 4/5 and woke up stuck inside my duvet. I screamed daddy and I remember him untangling.

You know what we've all been here. It's ok. You are a good mum. It could have happened at 2am. He would have yelled for you. Kids cause us so much worry. They just get into these situations sometimes. X

SiaPR · 01/06/2020 07:25

A child won’t get blue lips from being wrapped in a duvet. If he was sweating and had blue lips why didn’t you phone an ambulance? I don’t think the covers have anything to do with blue lips, that is more likely a heart defect.

wedding2021 · 01/06/2020 07:29

I was going today the same Sia. Sweating and being hot wouldn't cause blue lips. If he was the opposite and freezing cold then I could understand blue lips.

randomer · 01/06/2020 07:30

This genuinely sounds traumatic. Perhaps you could write down the exact events and your observations, incase you need to refer to them later eg GP.