Babysat by phones

[ABonHawks]

I'm sorry
I really can't stand parents that babysit there kids with their phones
Out and about in buggy in a park and your child stuck to your phone or their iPad
Or put having dinner, and you got pepper pig playing non your phone as rest of you eat
Why can't you teach your child to speak to you about what's going on around then ?
Why can't you teach your child to sit nicely while adults eat? Or do some colouring ?
Why has a child under age of 10 been giving a phone ?

I'm sorry but phones tablets not happening in my household till my child goes to high school simple

My oldest son (5) plays on a tablet for about 30 minutes a day, I don't use it as a 'babysitter' but I don't judge those that do. If you see someone in a park or at a restaurant doing this you're only seeing a snapshot of their day and know very little about their lives. Occasionally parenting is about survival for all concerned. Sometimes something has to give.

When you're a single parent, managing a household on your own, and everything you need to do - ordering grocery shopping, clothes, essentials, requesting the repeat prescriptions, paying household bills, checking the bank account, the savings account, the credit card, checking emails from work/uni/careers updates, replying to important emails - ALL of that stuff is done online. It really fucks me off when people see you on your phone near your child and just assume that you're just mindlessly scrolling through Facebook or whatever. Actually, fuck off, after spending the morning scraping porridge off the floor and trying to explain that we can't go outside because it's 6am and cold, why should I be judged for checking out for a few minutes to see what my actual friends in the real world are doing?

TL:DR: Oh do fuck off dear

All I'm saying is as a kid I was bought up without iPhones and iPads and tablets my parents actually had to speak to me and teach me numbers and letters
Manners to sit nicely at table while adults spoke etc
Why can't I teach my child that ?
Why do parents these days use technology to silence their kids ?
Let them speak
Talk to you ask you every question they want to and to learn from the people that love them not technology

All I'm saying is as a kid I was bought up without iPhones and iPads and tablets my parents actually had to speak to m
Yes and you grew up friendly, open minded, supportive of others with the recognition that others are different and that difference is great.

Oh wait...

most pompous thread ever

How old are you OP? Phones and tablets have only become a thing in like the last 10-15 years therefore unless you’re ridiculously young your comparison makes no sense

I try not to give my kids screens in restaurants or at the table but when they were about 18 months-4 sometimes it was the only way we could have a peaceful meal if eating out. We'd take them back once the food arrived. I know you don't think you will but if you eat out I bet you'll be handing over your phone to keep your child disturbing the peace at some point over the next few years

On planes/in airports my dc have screens as much as they want. When they were in the buggy only when really kicking off/really needed a few minutes peace! Only take them in the car on journeys over 2 hours. On holidays they watch them in the morning and before bed.

They mainly just watch tv at home but I don't believe screens are the devil. They're a good distraction when needed and tbh I have no idea how our parents coped without them! And I would imagine you won't get as far as secondary school unless you don't go out much or travel. That's when they come into their own imo.

I don't understand

Why can't we parent without need of technology? Humans been doing it for 100s of years

Why all of sudden do people have children to silence them ?

I'm sorry
Last time I'm saying this

No iPads no tablets no phones for my child till start of high school
Simple

My child not being babysat by a phone
I chose to have a child I parent that child I don't let technology do it for me.

I have a 5 yr old and he's never played with my phone, so it can be done!

I've got three children, one is a teenager and two primary school age, healthy balance of technology just now ( helpful especially just now in lockdown to communicate with friends and for school). They are lovely kids, and sometimes they use their tablets/phones on occasion. That's not all they do though, they play sports, games, read, have conversations...

But you know what OP? I'm in awe! You obviously know better than me and all the other posters on how to parent. Here's a badge

OP your kid your rules. But why in the name of god do you think we'd be remotely interested? And why the fuck are you so invested in other people's parenting? Teach your kid to be tolerant. That's clearly lacking in your house.

Op you must be a really old mother. Did you not have an atari or combat on the TV as they were early 80s. The person earlier that thinks drawings and crayons are relatively new in restaurants obviously didn't go to restaurants in the 80s either! If you look back in time children were expected to be seen and not heard so I don't think there was much interacting going on back then either.

Why do parents these days use technology to silence their kids ?

Because it exists. Hth.

Pretty sure this is just a wind up thread

Agree @newmane40593, complete with poor spelling and grammar in the hope that other posters will call her out on it 🙄

Pretty sure this is just a wind up thread

I think you’re right. I think there been an increase in these sort of threads recently. I’m suspicious of who is writing them now.... but they keep us all on here so... 🤔

Kid's conversation can be fucking boring. Just wait. It'll happen

Also, calling bollocks on you talking to your baby all the time, even whilst they sleep

HAHA 10 months old - good one

I have also chosen not to give my DC screens at the restaurant table as I prefer to talk with them / colour in etc. I do find screens are great on flights and long car journeys.

BUT I've soon found in life that there will always be other things that I do with my DC that people would judge me for so I don't bother judging others. Mums get enough judgement without us turning on other mums.

You'll learn that soon enough OP. We're all just trying to get by so don't be a cow.

I know what you mean OP.

And as this is a parenting site I think we should be able to discuss different ways of bringing up children without being called "judgey" and told to mind our own business.

I just want to add

Since lockdown. ALL of my 7 and 5 yr olds work is on an iPad......

It gets sent back to the teacher. So how are you going to cope with that?

You can say no screen time. But having a computer illiterate child could be quite damaging. The world is going towards the use of technology. Yes 100's if years ago they didn't use screens. But today it would take your child back years if they didn't know their way around a computer. IT is also one of the best paid jobs right now. Does that mean you don't want them to have a job like that? Because if they won't have one or use one before that age. You're going to be putting them back years

However you CAN help them by not letting them have the run of YouTube 15 hrs a day. But to say they aren't having screens till secondary school. That means they will be years behind their peers.

As my kids school they are all given an iPad to do their homework on! They have IT lessons at the age of 5!

There HAS to be a bit of give and take. Yes teach your child. Yes. Teach them numbers using paper. But your child will need to know his/her way round a computer by the age of about 9.....

You should really think about the positives and negatives of screen use.

Even before lockdown my school age DC were getting some homework that needed to be done on computers, tablets etc.

Primary school age DC that is.

YOU can do it without technology. Don't judge those who choose a different way or assume they don't also do the education, play and cuddles you mention either.

Nobody with a 10 month old thinks "my child will be on a screen from age 3." There are no benefits to you or child yet. When you get there you may feel differently. Technology is a big part of primary education so you will also want your child to keep up. Xbox is a big part of socialising in the darker winter months at late primary, you may allow your child for that reason.

Do what is best for you, don't look down on other people. Your child will learn kindness from you, difficult for them to be kind when they see mum judging strangers.