The logistics of three children

[PetitFilou1]

This is a bit premature, but I'm planning no3 for next year. It occured to me I'm going to have to get one to school, one to nursery and manage a newborn - if that is what happens. Is this a sensible idea? possible? How do people cope?

Newborn goes in sling/pram whether they like it or not, and off you go!

Actually, my DS3 spent most of his first few weeks in the sling, whether we were indoors or out.

What's the age gap going to be? I found a three year age gap much easier than a two year age gap.

How do you cope? You just do - you just find ways to manage it. I have 19 months between ds1 and ds2 and 20 months between ds2 and ds3. It's harder going out with them when they are small, if you are on your own, but it's OK. It's actually harder once the younger one starts running off! Ha ha!

Mine are 6.5, nearly 5 and 3 now - so it's getting easier.

I have ds 3.5 and dd 2 (just). So I'd be aiming for a 3 year gap. But....it will mean that just as ds goes to school and dd could have time just with me, that potential dc 3 comes along (and I do feel a bit bad about that) but I am 35 now and don't want to leave any later...
I'm wondering how on earth I will get them all up, fed and out of the house (and myself up) and I'm not even pregnant yet!

I agree with Dino - I'm going to have this from the end of this month - DS1 at school (thankfully literally just next door), DS2 starting nursery - so it'll be everyone up and dressed, DS1 shoved into the school gate at 8.45 and told to go in when the "inside" gate is opened (at about 8.50), zoot down the hill with pushchair and DS2 in tow and hopefully get him to the nusery for 9am.....it's only a 7/8 minute walk - but you know what 3/4yr old boys are like .

DS1 is almost 7, DS2 nearly 4, and DS3 14 weeks.

next September I'll have the joys of a toddler, DS2 at school next door, and DS1 up the top of the hill at the middle school.

I don't find it a problem to get out in the morning - you get up at a sensible time, get yourself ready before the kids, have clothes sorted the night before and any school stuff you are going to need.

You just get a routine gonig.

"get yourself ready before the kids"

that is of course if your newborn/baby wakes up at "predicatable" times .

albolute fuckwits cope
so oyull eb fine

Agree - you just get a routine going. And the older ones amuse the baby, so it's not like being at home with a PFB.

It depends if you have to walk or drive to both school and nursery.
I don't drive and would find it impossible to get one to school and one to nursery. Luckily dh does the nursery run for me.

Have two large glasses of wine before you leave the house. Then you just dont care.

Seriously tho, leaving the house is hard. Organisation is the key I fear.

Mine are 7,4 and 2. My oldest has autism. What we do is get bags ready and in the care the night before. I lay their clothes out the night before and I get up and get ready first (very difficult with a newborn). They have a set routine in the morning: breakfast then straight to the bathroom for a wash and to brush teeth...then clothes then line up at the door. It took a long time to get a routine going.

With a newborn you may not be able to feed and sort baby before you go. I had to learn to let my newborn cry during the school run. When we got home I nursed him and gave him all my attention. If I tried to get him fed and perfect right before we left the house than all hell broke loose.

You just manage it.

Nursery- well we were always a bit late, as were many. School comes first. Whilst baby doesn't give a damn what time he's anywhere as long as is fed and dry.

Expecting No4 btw!

Mine are (boys) 7.5, 6.5, and 4

You have to learn to be in 3 places at once.

I find it much better now all mine are at scool in the same place for the same length of time.

Running from one school to the other every hour or so drove me totally nuts. But as others have said, you just do cope with it somehow and hang on to the fact that it'll get easier eventually.

I have ds 3.11yrs,dd1 20m dd2 8m. Ds has been in playgroup the past year which means he was in 9-11.30am. Never had any probs with the getting ready etc. We are all up by 7am. I get dressed first [dc clothes sorted night before], take them and dc downstairs, breakfast then get dressed. Then all upstairs to brush teeth , do haiir etc. I then sort my hair out while they watch tv. We are out the door by 8.30am

"I find it much better now all mine are at scool in the same place for the same length of time."

I you.

DS1 will go up to next school as DS2 starts Reception. When DS3 starts reception DS2 will move up to the same school as DS1.....but the following year DS1 will go to secondary school, DS2 will still be at the junior school and DS3 at the infant school - eeek!

Meant to add whoever is in school would be my priority, then nursery.

LOL Cod That's the trouble though - if I was a fuckwit I wouldn't be worrying about it would I?!

I will clearly have to give up work if we have three (hides from Xenia at this point)

Oh QofQ that'll be a tough one.

Will you allow the older one to go to school on his own?

Mine are much younger atm and only at infants and juniors. I don't know how I'll feel about letting older dd do the trip alone to secondary school when she goes (not for a few years yet) although I know others that do.

The year my third was born my eldest started school 3 months later so we had to contend with a new baby, a new routine with school and a 2 year old. The situation today is my DS1 is in year 2 and my DD has started school. My 2 year old is asleep.

I walked to school and had the baby in a sling and my DD in the buggy. That worked for about 4 months until the baby got too big and then he went in to the buggy and my daughter walked.

if he goes to the school we hope he'll go to then he'll have to make his way to the bus stop (school is in next town) on his own I think - although it may be possible to drop him at bus stop, then zoot home to finish getting younger 2 ready for school (bus leaves about 8am - I think).

TBH I'm hoping that by the time DS2 is in YR3 (the school year that they'll both be at the same school for a year) that I'll be able to trust them to walk up the hill on their own together - it's literally straight to the top of the road then across a pedestrian crossing (green man thingy) and the school gate is right there - it's VERY busy with children and parents in the morning so they wouldn't be "on their own" crossing.........but we'll cross that bridge when we come to it.......

I ame expecting DS to go to school on his own once he starts middle school at age 10. I will still have DD to take to first school at that point. So I think your worries will be over by then QofQ. But I would be tempted to wait until the door opens for your DS1 and be 5 mins late for nursery with DS2 (unless you can find another mother to watch him). Nurseries are used to children being 5 mins late due to older siblings.

QofQ That sounds a good plan. You have lots of time to rehearse the route and get them switched on to the idea

They don't tell us about dilammas like this when you have children, do they?

Tbh the constant to-ing and fro-ing from school to pre-school was one of the things I found most hard to cope with. I always seemed to be putting my shoes and coat on and off and getting very little else done during the day.

I know I can trust DS1 to go in once the gates open - he's well known by most of the mothers too - and if I'm honest there's been a few times in June/July (when DS3 was tiny) that I shuffled to the house gate in my dressing gown, waited for him to disappear inside the school gate and shuffled back inside . He'll be 7 in 12 days time so one of the older ones too.

You'll do it because you have to. And it's worth the morning mayhem once you get the older 2 away and breathe a big sigh of relief to only have newborn at home, who doesn't mind watching your choice of morning TV.

My advice would be:

1. Get everything ready so older 2 only need to get dressed and eat breakfast, then out!
2. Get a dummy for the baby - my dc3 never fed well so I never knew if she might start howling at inconvenient times.
3. Master the art of turning off the car engine, taking out a car seat, unlocking the front door and placing car seat down 100% smoothly and in absolute silence. There's nothing more annoying then when lo falls asleep on the way home then the eyes open wide the minute you stop the car.
4. Lower your previous standards a lot.

It is knackering though, I won't lie to you. Not quite so knackered now (dc3 is 18 months) but now she doesn't want to go in the pushchair/be carried when we're in a hurry, so just new problems really.

Go for it - it's great fun!

Goobledigook, am very concerned as my first 3dcs are exactly same ages as your three .

Only difference is is that I have an 18month old as well.

And as to coping, you just do and it is great fun (sometimes)