If you work and have baby in nursery...

[WhatchaMean]

Did you take them out when you took 2nd/3rd maternity leave?
I have an 18 month old who goes to nursery 4 days a week. I'm pregnant with 2nd child, and a friend commented "it will be great for DC1 to have you home with her for your maternity leave", but I was actually planning to let her stay in nursery (maybe reduce to 3 days) for a couple of reasons:

1. She loves nursery and is extremely active, so I think she'll be bored while I'm trying to navigate the early newborn months
2. It took her a while initially to settle in, so breaking the routine, and then returning her when I go back to work will be like starting all over again.
3. I'll be getting paid by work for most of it anyway

What do most people do? Now I'm not sure if I'm being really selfish

Hell to the no.

I needed those days.

God no, my child went to nursery as normal and I just collected her earlier

Keep at least some nursery hours. They thrive on routine and once baby comes you will need some time to be with baby and not the older one. I believe it's best to try and avoid big changes around the arrival of a new sibling as that's such a huge change in their lives it's kinder to minimise other changes.

DD1 is in 4 days as well but I will definitely be leaving her in!

I reduced 3 days to 2. Needed nursery days!

I would leave her in as long as you don’t reduce more than a day. In the same situation I reduced my DS to one day for financial reasons and it was a disaster.
It wasn’t often enough, he was horribly unsettled and with hindsight I would have had him home all the time. I think 3
days would have been ok though.

I took mine out of nursery. I could have done with a bit of a break but I sort of felt wrong leaving DD in when she struggled to settle and I was at home anyway.

I just reduced hours- she’d been part time anyway at two days 8-5 so we did 2 days 9-3. Though in hindsight if I could have afforded a slightly later stay I would have as I felt like I was always having to wake DC2 from their nap to go and collect her.

Mine stayed in the same 4 full days! I picked up slightly earlier but most days she was in not long after 7:30 in the morning because she was an early riser and had probably been up 3 hours at that point and I was knackered after being up with her baby brother all night as well, so DH use to drop her off on his way to work as normal, so I could stay in bed or potter with baby! She loved nursery though so I had no worries at all.

Some nursery is good when you have the second one, because babies can be limiting for older children particularly in the early days and we needed to separate them to reduce rivalry.

No.

That sense of routine will really help them adjust to a changing dynamic at home.

Defiantly don't take your child out! Nursery is a good way to socialise at that age, I feel like it's abit disruptive to get them settled, take them out for 9 months (or however long maturity is) and then put them back! Plus it'll be a lot easier for you giving the new baby your full attention. Maybe reduce the days if you want tho, or do half day instead of full etc if you want more time together as a family

I’ll be leaving dd in. I will only be taking short leave again (3 months) so not worth changing anything.

I’m reducing two days to one (mainly due to costs) and he will continue with one other day with MIL. He loves nursery and his day with his grandmother and I’m sure I will be grateful for a bit of time just with the baby.

God no.

Children like structure and routine. The arrival of a sibling is bad enough, but to stop nursery too - that’s not necessary or fair really. This is if she’s enjoying it, of course.

It’s also nice for the second child to get you to themselves for a bit. The toddler will be all-consuming.

Plus, you could certainly do with napping during the day, I’m sure.

Honestly, I see nothing but benefit to keeping her in if she enjoys it and you can afford it. Moreover, I see disadvantages to disrupting her routine.

My DS 2.3 goes two days a week. I'm due baby in July and hadnt even considered taking him out of nursery. It's part of his routine and he enjoys it so I think continuing will be beneficial to everyone, in our case anyway. Hoping to get some funding when he turns three as well.

DS1 was almost 3 when DS2 arrived. Kept him in full time nursery for the 5 months I was off. He loves nursery and meant I could concentrate on looking after the baby. Also I would have lost his place if I didn’t carry on paying so no point really!

100% keep them in best for both of you I'd say. I'm a teacher and currently in nursery even though they are 3 and 4 they still sometimes struggle after breaks! If it were me I'd drop to 3 days in nursery and probably collect earlier as dont get out of school until around 6pm normally but you can pick and choose that day to day anyway.

If she was a bit older would you have pulled her out of school to homeschool while you were on maternity leave? Her routine should continue.

Imo a nursery isn’t just childcare it’s a space for your child to develop socially and developmentally- I wouldn’t pull my child out of that unless I couldn’t afford it

I took mine out after a month. I reduced his days to 2 days a week when I went on leave while still pregnant but then ended up withdrawing him.
Reasons were
He became very unsettled after the baby and cried every morning when I left him.
It is expensive

I started him again when baby was 8 months old to get him used to it again and he settle better. I think being a little bit older helped.

In hindsight I would have taken him out when I went on leave. A baby and a toddler are hard but toddlers know there has been a huge change in their life and he wanted to be around me for it. One benefit was that I never had to get him ready to drop him off or pick him up, we could just go about our lives on our own time schedule.

No, DS stayed in nursery. Sure he did shorter days but I needed that time.

absolutely not. my son needs nursery for social, behavioural, everything development. i need him at nursery for my sanity. the new baby needs time with mummy at peace just like my ds benefited from. at the moment he's only booked in for 2 days per week but I'm going to up it to at least 3.

and imagine taking them out of nursery only to then shove them into school 5 days a week! my ds would lose his mind even though he complains about going to nursery.

Oh I forgot another reason why I withdrew him.
I got a little anxious about him bringing illness home to the baby.

I'm having my second next year and no way would I take DD1 out (she goes 3 days). Mainly because she loves it and I don't want to upset her routine but a big factor is funded hours kick in soon and I doubt she'd have a place to go back to on the days I work afterwards. She'll probably have shorter days there overall but I'm really looking forward to 1 on 1 time with the baby