If you work and have baby in nursery...

[WhatchaMean]

Did you take them out when you took 2nd/3rd maternity leave?
I have an 18 month old who goes to nursery 4 days a week. I'm pregnant with 2nd child, and a friend commented "it will be great for DC1 to have you home with her for your maternity leave", but I was actually planning to let her stay in nursery (maybe reduce to 3 days) for a couple of reasons:

1. She loves nursery and is extremely active, so I think she'll be bored while I'm trying to navigate the early newborn months
2. It took her a while initially to settle in, so breaking the routine, and then returning her when I go back to work will be like starting all over again.
3. I'll be getting paid by work for most of it anyway

What do most people do? Now I'm not sure if I'm being really selfish

I left ds in nursery he’s 2. Dd is 4.5m. If we’d taken him out I wouldn’t have coped. Also he loves nursery. And we need to keep his space.

My DD did one day in nursery and one day with my mil- to take baby to a baby only group in the morning and she would just have DD all day then.
I think it's important to have nursery days to catch up but I personally think 4 is too many. For financial reasons as well as benefits that come from being with mum a bit more. I'd say 2.5days is plenty.

I left mine in full time. She loves nursery, the routine and familiarity helped.

Plus work paid for nursery when I was on SMP.

Phew ok I feel a lot better now, thanks so much everyone. Some really good points that I didn't even think about. Yes I think I'll stick to my original plan to keep her in either 3 or 4 days, and collect earlier in the evenings

We dropped from full time to the 3 funded days, as was 3. He loved it and I wanted baby to have some individual time with me. Plus it gave me a break!

No. I even increased DC1 to another day. Now teens, I look back and it was the only way I coped. A two year gap, zero help. That, and getting back to work asap was my salvation.

I think if you can afford to keep DC1 in nursery, then Defo do it!they love routine, probably made friends there.
And it'll be a nice break for you to just spend time with baby Number 2 too!

Will be having my 3.5 year old in nursery three days - am pretty sure I wouldn’t cope without those days! They will be my only chance to get a bit of a rest as he wants to play non-stop, twelve hours a day, and doesn’t nap. It wouldn’t be fair on him to be alone with me five days a week while I try to cluster feed a newborn.

Kept my 3yo in nursery 3 days. Felt a bit guilty and planned to reduce it to two but the time never seemed right! He was fine with it though and I really needed those days. Didn't have grandparents etc to have him.

I reduced from 3 days to 2

Yes I took mine out - but he really needed that time with me. Some toddlers love nursery in which case leave them in of you can afford it! But some are more needy and depends on age and character etc

I also took mine out. I put the money I would have paid into an account every week and that paid for extended unpaid leave. She settled in grand again after the break and I enjoyed my time with the two of them before I went back to work.

Yes. Well I reduced to one nursery day. No regrets-loved spending extra time with him.

I imagine as with all these things we do what we think will work best, and if it doesn’t, we change things. If my son (who will be 23mo when number two arrives) struggles with the new arrival and the answer is to stop nursery altogether then obviously we’ll look at that

I’m expecting dc2 in July and will keep dd (who will be 3) in nursery, probably even extending to another day as we will get free hours (she currently does one full day and one half day). She adores nursery and I will need that time with the baby! We have no family help at all nearby and I know I won’t be half as good a mother if I’ve got both of them all the time! Plus she will be stimulated and enriched so much at nursery she hopefully won’t mind things being a bit more boring at home for the newborn bit...

Kept my older child in nursery, kept a bit of a routine for her, but reduced her hours (went a bit later / picked up a bit earlier)

2 year gap. I reduced dd1s nursery days from 5 to 3. It kept me sane and gave me time to rest! We were planning to reduce it to 2 days but I was struggling to cope as it was (we found out later dd1 has ASD). It did cost a fortune. I was off on mat leave a year. We didn't get the free hours until I'd been back at work 4 months.

We were keeping DD at nursery, she went two days a week. Her sibling was born and we swapped her nursery in the same month (after a neglect incident at the other one). I was so stressed by it, but as she never settled at the first it wasn't so bad, she loves the second nursery.
Two days was probably the perfect balance for us; I didn't feel too guilty but was able to do baby-focused stuff on her nursery days.

I couldn’t afford to keep ds1 in nursery on my maternity pay so didn’t have a choice but to take him out. Would not recommend it if you can still afford the fees. When I went back to work after ds2, ds1 was 3 and it took him months to settle back in. He did have a lot going on as their father and I had just split but still I think having him at nursery even just a few days would have been beneficial all round and would have been great for bonding with the baby

Our dd will be 3 when number 2 arrives and we'll keep her in pre school 2 days a week, to keep the routine. She absolutely loves it, and I think it will be nice to have bonding time with the baby for me as well.

Dc was at nursery 3 days and childminder 2 days and I reduced to nursery 2 days and childminder 1 day until the free hours kicked in a few months later and we moved to 3 days (9-3) just at childminder. I changed the actual days a couple of times over the year. He definitely liked the routine and it kept his place available for when I went back to work.

I increased from 3 to 5 days! Only short term, but my baby literally did not sleep and constantly threw up all day and night til we sorted allergies and reflux when she was much older. My older child was only just 2 when baby was born and it was such hard work, financially it was a huge stretch but mentally those weeks he was full time saved me I think. We dropped down to 4 then back to 3 as time went on and I learned to survive on a few hours broken sleep!

Sahm and I sent my eldest to nursery just before the new baby was born (when he was 2) so he could get used to it as his new routine. He did 2 mornings a week and it absolutely saved my sanity. Definitely don’t take them out if you can afford it

DS1 was a bit older when DS2 came along (almost 3) but we kept him in nursery, although reduced his time here from 4 days to 3 days. It worked well for us all.

Also, part of the reason we kept him in was our nursery was heavily over subscribed and I had no guarantee I could get him back in later.