Just had nine month old weighed - feeling like the worst parent

[Rarfy]

Nine month old dd has just been weighed. She's 19lbs. Almost on the 75th centile. Not bad I know but she was born on the 9th.

Anyway I felt like they were interrogating me about what she eats. I'll be the first to admit I don't do baby led weaning. I don't like it I'm frightened she'll choke. That isn't going to change.

I don't just give her pouches and mashed food though I give her bananas, toast, crumpets, bagels etc I just break them up for her. A typical day is cereal. Usually weetabix, porridge or shreddies. Lunch is usually a sandwich - chicken, tuna or cheese then tea is a meal pouch Ella's kitchen or aldis own. After each meal she will have a dessert which will be a fruit pot, a from age frais or a small custard pot. I very very rarely give her snacks as I don't feel like she needs them.

She is still having three 6 ounce bottles a day. First thing, mid aft and then last thing.

Is this quite bad? I feel like I'm doing something wrong it's really upset me.

She was born skinny and has become heavier - but is her height proportional to her weight? If not then perhaps she’s due for a growth spurt? Kids gain weight then all of a sudden they shoot up and become in proportion.

There's some great ideas here. So helpful. The veg and mash thing is the easiest to do really I'm a dab hand at that it's just getting on and doing it.

She does have a travel cot downstairs full of toys which is a safe space and fun for her I just feel guilty if she's in it too much. If I have housework etc to do which I always do. I know we can do it though. Just better planning and more confidence.

Op asking for advice on here is useless. You’ll find one or two responsible posters but don’t listen to the majority.

Look for some medical advice and books about baby weaning. Look at the NHS website and ask to see a dietician if you’re worried.

My (uninformed like the rest on here) opinion is she’s getting food to actually eat whereas she needs food for exploring and introductions. She’ll eat for actual eating’s sake when she’s 1 and above.

Yes I understand what you're saying. I felt like we did all the first taste things so I did used to puree the veg and fruit etc from about 6 - 7.5 months and then I wanted to move onto things that were more of a meal and easy and convenient to make then I guess I got into a rut with that and the health visitors comment about a light lunch of sandwich. I didn't see the harm in the pouches if I'm completely honest just that they were a bit repetitive.

I'm surprised that you're concerned about baby led weaning TBH if you are happy to give sandwiches. I found sandwiches one of the harder things for DC to manage at that age. So if she does OK with sandwiches, you'll probably find that she does OK with all kinds of finger foods. Just avoid anything round - sweetcorn is OK if she picks it up herself. You can squash blueberries so that they are flatter. I cut cherry tomatoes into small pieces (messy) and grapes into quarters, later halves.

I totally agree with the Annabel Karmel books if you do prefer mashed foods, you can always find them cheap on amazon or at nearly new sales/charity shops as well. Maybe ask around friends with older children if anyone has one they aren't using any more.

I suppose she does do a lot of BLW more than I probably put across in my posts. She's sat feeding herself tuna now and I have made her a corn on the cob. Only has one tooth so not sure how she will get on but we can try.

Don’t worry about teeth, their gums are pretty hard! Mine has one tooth and manages to eat all sorts

I agree, their gums are very hard, they have all their teeth just under the gum. It's amazing what they can eat if they really want it!!

My MIL was always concerned about me giving my daughter food before she had teeth - till she got bitten! Those gums are like razors!

Those silicon muffin trays are worth getting for freezing stuff. You can then freeze portions in each sections, then when frozen pop out and into a labelled food bag . Then reuse for other stuff. Means once they are out of baby stage the muffin pan can be used forever for well 'muffins'!

She didn't manage to eat much of the corn but did have a good munch. Picked up some piccolo stock cubes so I'm going to try a curry and a pasta sauce.

Don't feel bad, most of the advice is contradictory online and around here health visitors say it's not in their remit to advise, so you do what you think is right. It's great that you're open to change, but please don't feel bad. Baby led weaning isn't the be all and end all anyway, but maybe after porridge include some fresh fruit? As many different ones on different days as possible to get used to textures but also taste and how to handle them. The pouches aren't too bad if you feel happier using them for a meal, just go for the ones without fruit as a base; many of the 'meal' ones dont, but I'd give half (and save the other half) and something else as well for them to explore. If you feel more confident that's great, triple check of course, but pretty sure aside from honey, whole nuts, and a few other things they can try anything- obviously control salt intake as well. I felt similar to start with, but I really enjoyed it once we both became more confident and could eat largely the same meals. Textures, taste and balance is key.

There's also some fab recipes on Instagram etc, banana pancakes (just banana and egg), spinach and egg muffins and pinwheels were all favourites here.

I would stop stressing about the term baby led weaning. It just means self feeding, which from the sounds of it your baby already enjoys. At her age, traditional weaning would include finger foods, which you are doing already.

The weight thing it doesn't sound like an issue. I wouldn't make a point of cutting down milk, she will just gradually take less as she eats more food. All babies do this, at differing stages. They might not drop much for a while!

Probably just try and be a bit more adventurous in terms of what finger type foods you offer her and I bet she will surprise you!!

Our go to 'no think' staples at the moment are cherry tomatoes, sweet potato or parsnip roasted wedges, omelette, sliced up fruit eg plums, nectarines, roast courgette, tenderstem broccoli, something on toast eg avocado, nut butter, cream cheese.

Don't worry about low fat anything. Babies don't need low fat stuff. Variety where you can but nothing wrong with having some regular staples.

One thing I found, things my one turned her nose up at first she grew to like after a few times of being given it. Her face the first time she tried avocado was a picture and now she will pick up chunks of it and eat it.

A lot of the pouches even savoury ones have fruit such as apples in them, so in addition to the fruit purées, fromage frais, custard, sugary cereal she's getting too much sugar. Having said that I only feed DS home made food, no pouches, jars, melty puffs etc and he was just weighed 21 pounds and is nine and a half months, he's also 75th centile for height, he was born on 50th for both.

If she likes fromage frais Yeo valley do ones called little yeos that have no sugar, just plain yoghurt (in a big tub) or flavoured ones that are just plain yoghurt with a tiny amount of fruit puree, they don't taste sweet.
I batch cook for DS use the silicone ice cube trays and once frozen put the cubes into freezer bags. Spag bol, casserole, curry, fish pie, home made cheese sauce, when I'm coming for us I just have a little saucepan on the go at the same time and dint add salt, stick, chilli, soy sauce etc. For lunch today he had some pasta with broccoli and cheese sauce and then half a small banana, for breakfast porridge or scrambled egg or plain yoghurt is better than sugary cereal, although Weetabix is ok.

My DS went from the 50th to the 95th at one point and I didn't even occur to me to worry or feel bad? That's just what babies do. They fatten out and then grow taller, I really really could not bring myself to be worried about that.

You're describing IMO a normal diet for a child that age. Eating plenty but still drinking lots of milk. Please don't get anxious about this, the weight will even out very soon.

relax, your baby and diet sound fine.

baby food is not poison, contrary to what a lot of people on here say.

It's not poison but is really high in sugar and should be eaten occasionally in the same way adults should have ready meals and crisps occasionally.

Op sounds like you're making all the right changes. It's not about the weight of your dd just about her overall health and future relationship with food. Try not to worry if she doesn't eat it. My dc (6&9) still go through phases of being awful fuss pots then suddenly they'll eat a great variety again. I'm not sure it ever gets easier I'm afraid

Not all baby food is high in sugar, just check the savory ones aren't mixed with fruit, and the sugar level in the nutritional info. With the sugary fruit ones I'd add a small amount to a savory food so it's just a taste, ie on top of pancakes or homemade porridge fingers.

My kids (now 2 and 4) both went up at least 2 percentile lines from 6 months to 9 months once they’d started solid foods. They just loved to eat! And their height increased proportionally. My DD was only 10th percentile at a month old and yet is in the 90th now for height and weight at 2 years old. And she’s very healthy. They are just tall children with tall parents.

Weight percentile without height is not much use. If your daughter is tall then of course you’d expect her to be heavier than average!

Definitely try more of the real foods. Pouches are handy for out and about, but I tried to not use them at home. My kids always loved just regular vegetables - peas, steamed carrots, broccoli etc. Also things like cheese, bits of chicken, pasta are easy finger foods and enough of a meal for a little one

Things that make a good easy peas lunch or tea:
Scrambled egg
Slices of avocado
A good Quailty fish finger (not everyone agrees)
Home made sweet potato wedges (baked, not deep fried)
Pasta with easy / simple home made sauce

Thanks everyone. I've definitely noticed with the pouches they are heavy on the fruit or sweet vegetable side. We've made a few good changes today so I will keep them up. I'm not dead against pouches and probably will still use but more occasionally.

I think the big thing is to switch out at least two desserts for fresh fruit and if she has a sandwich for lunch maybe half of what she was eating then some veg on the side instead. Grating the veg is a revelation to me and dd will manage it just fine. If I can get some staple sauces nailed than were really onto something.

Bless you for weathering us with our honest (sometimes too honest) undressed opinions!

Things have maybe moved on but upthread you asked about bags or tubs for freezing things. If you end up batch cooking and freezing for you, partner + baby I'd suggest pyrex or (pyrex style glass) squarish tubs - I've found plastic stains if you use tomatoes (which you will...), and pyrex can pretty much go fridge or freezer to oven or microwave with no intermediate step thus eliminating one item to wash.

Well done on making such positive changes. It will make a huge difference in the long run. They all get fussy again by 2 but if they have been exposed to lots of tastes they are much more likely to stop being fussy.