Do you speak exclusively in your own language?

[Sibongile]

We have a daughter of 11 months, my husband speaks English and I speak Afrikaans. He understands very little of it. All the books say that one parent should stick to one language, but I find that difficult because my husband then doesn't understand anything I say to our daughter. What are other people's experiences? Do children get confused when you mix languages? She already says about 6 words, but they are all words that are the same in both languages, like 'hello'.

Hi Sibongile

Not read all this thread although it looks really interesting just wanted to add that my DH is Greek and we speak to our 2 children in both Greek and English. My 2 year old is picking both the languages up with no problems and absolutely no confusion at all (my other DD is only 3 months old so early days). This is probably the best time to learn a language!

Branster, no problem, I respect your privacy - I was just curious. We are in Belgium and both of mine watch Dutch children's TV. I am amazed at how much they have picked up. DD2 (3) was at a party the other day, they were painting, and one of the children asked, in Dutch, for the yellow paint. DD2 said, in Dutch, "I've got the yellow," and passed it over. I couldn't believe it! I wouldn't say I am fluent in any language, but have a reasonable grasp of French, German, Romanian, Dutch and Polish and have always enjoyed learning languages. I learned French from age 3, and also a bit of Spanish, but learned the other languages as an adult. I did try learning Russian but got it very confused with Polish as they are so similar.

Tanzie that is amazing! Their little brains are like a sponge on a seashore!

I've meant to add this before but forgot. Google have an 'in your language' tool to the right of thier search facility, could try there for Romanian sites etc. Good luck!

Also, although I'm pretty certain Romanian language is not exactly in demand (don't mean to be rude, just factual) considering the EU is extending at such a fast rate, you might find when your kids are adults, there is a lot of bussiness to be done in that part of the world and knowing the local language is certainly an advantage for a foreigner. So they can only but benefit from knowing it.

I didn't know that about Polish & Russina but it does make sense now that you've mentioned it. Will do my best not to elarn any Polish then so I don't get confused when i do decide on Russian. By the way, I have a British friend who's parents were both Polish and moved to teh UK. he's born & bred in England but can speak Polish fluently. i have to tell you that he has one of the most prosperous bussiness in Poland and is some sort of chairman of a company based in there too, all down to the fact that he can speak the language ans saw the potential in that market. But the UK company he works for is pretty big so oobviously that helps with backing. I think there is a lot of potential in emerging markets like those, work force is cheper than here and talent and enthusyasm are abundent so getting a foot in the door there when you know the language and/or the local customs coupled with a Western experience can only lead to positive results for both the investor and the local economy.

Agree whole heartedly Branster!
The state of 2nd (3rd/4th/5th) language learning in the Uk is disgraceful, and boy, are the British going to get a shock with the expansion of the EU. There are thousands of highly educated multilingual go getting young Eastern Europeans out there who are going to blow us out of the water if we don't get our arses into gear!

Used to live in Russia and lecture in a university there. Must say, the level was unbelievably high despite the fact that most had never spoken English to a native speaker. The head of faculty also told me that some of the staff had spent a semester in the States and had had to rewrite their course as the work prepared for them was of an embarassingly low standard.

Must say, coming as I do (at least partly) from a place where Welsh medium education is the norm, it is gratifying to see that this is going well. Children arrive in Welsh medium schools from all corners of the earth and most are speaking good Welsh very very quickly.

(I was so tickled and proud to see a traditionally dressed young Indian women, talking Welsh into a mobile the other day!)

Could bang on about this for ages, but that will do for now I'm sure!

Jeeez, 'must say' a lot of things musn't I?!
(Why the sudden urgency I wonder..)

Dh is Danish and tries to speak mainly in Danish to our sons. Although I don't speak Danish, over the last ten years I have picked up enough to be able to follow most dinner-table conversations. I just butt in with English whenever I want to join in and get an answer in whichever language.
Just to repeat everyone else's points about getting books and videos and audiotapes in the other language. Song tapes in Danish are great - very funky. We are also lucky enough to have a Danish Association in our city so go along to their meetings and parties. Here our sons can meet lots of other Danglish children and experience specifically Danish customs like Christmas and midsummer.

Hi - don't have experience of one parent one language - but have a 5 month old who has only heard Farsi so far. Farsi is my DH's and my own native language. We intend to apeak and read to him only in Farsi, beacuse that way he will associate the hime with Farsi and the outside world with English. We get books, tapes and videos sent to us from our country. Are you able to do this with Africaans ?
I am a firm believer (this one is from experience ) that children can learn any language extremely well, i.e. like a native, under the age of 10. The research on bilingual children confirms this age. I came to the UK aged 9 and 1/2 and am biligual (Farsi/English) - I speak both languages like a native - i.e. no foreign accent when I speak either. I have also read several books on biligual children and they emphasise what you have said - "one parent one language" if there are 2 languages in the home as in your case. Also, you seem concerned that your 11 month old says very little in either language. One of the classic traits of children who are spoken to in one or more languages from birth, is that they (generally) start to speak much later than monolingual children. The research does not support "confusion". In fact it has been shown that bilingual children have (generally) higher IQ's and do much better at school in the early years than monolingual children. So don't give up ! My DH also speaks fluent French and we intend to introduce DS to French early on. We are not concerned that he has little exposure to English at home although we live in London, because he will learn it quickly in playgroups and nursery.

Hello all !

I speak only in french to my daughter ! My partner is english and he's working so he is less with her that I am. I'm still in maternity leave so I find it normal to speak to her in french. I'll be devastated if she was only speaking english. I find great the fact that my DD is from 2 countries, it makes it more interesting. I just hope she'll enjoy it too, speaking french with mummie and english with daddy. She's 6 month today and I'm curious to know what is going to be her first word, I hope it's going to be Maman !!!!!

Hi,
We mix arabic, french and english. I have always mixed arabic and french with my own family and to be honest I can not recall which language I mastered first.English is more of an "acquired taste" for my DH and me but we have now been in the UK long enough for it to become like a second nature.I do not see any risk of schizophrenia in multilingualism.I do not have any "theory" or "tip" other that to trust your kids and be on the lookout for any sign of "late development" of speech.

I have a 22mo DS who was born in Germany, but we are now living in Oz. My DH is german, and I learnt german while living there for nearly 2 years. I speak both english and german to DS, out of habit of having been over there, but I am trying to cut back the german so as not to confuse or teach him the wrong thing (actually he says strawberry in german, but pronounces it wrongly as I wasn't saying it quite right). My DH does his best to always speak german with him, and as I understand it it isn't a problem for us.

What I am worried about is that friends of ours in the same situation to us but with a 2 year old and and 3.5 year old have found that in the last 1.5years the older boy will only respond in english, even though his dad always speaks german, and so now the younger one will only respond in english also. Are they embarrassed? Is the dad not doing a good enough job teaching them german? Should the parents insist that they respond to their dad in german. Their german grandparents came out recently and the kids would talk to them in english even though the grandparents didn't speak any english. It's got me worried. I want to know how to handle it if it starts happending with us. TIA. What a great thread.