Anyone get annoyed with interfering MIL

[PoppyHxx]

So my daughter is 7 months old. She has pureed veg that I prepare myself. When we go for a roast I keep being questioned as to why she cant have some of the roast (mashed up). I havent said anything but I dont want my baby having the home made gravy , when its full of chicken juice , flavourings and salt. So yesterday my little girl had finished her veg I broght with me. Then MIL gives her some mash and puts gravy on it and says there thats better than vegetables..
Uhhh just irritates me . Shes 7 months old she only needs healthy foods, she has a life time to have all of these other things!

Then last week she insisted I gave her chocoalte mouse. I put a teent bit on a spoon for her to have , of course my little girl loved it. And MIL said ' give me more mummy '. I said no that time. Shes just a baby 🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️ sorry for my rant

You need to say that you don't want to give her that food. You don't need to explain just say "No thanks MIL, she is eating the food I've prepared today." If she continues just keep repeating. If she doesn't give up just say "I have told you a few times now, I am not giving her that food."

Or get DH to speak to her about it.

It takes time for some grandmother's to adjust to the fact that the baby is not her baby, it is yours. Just be firm and stay calm. Definitely dont let her persuade you into changing your mind - that will just make her push you even more next time. It can help to reassure her you are not criticising her - so say, actually there is research around now that says chocolate and salt are bad for babies at this age, and I know you just want what's best for baby too don't you?

Its just hard because im in her home and I dont want to offend her in anyway. I know shes not try8ng to cause any harm to my baby and I know it wont actually harm her. But its just for her entertainment as of course its cute watching a baby try different things.

You need to hold your ground. Your baby. Repeat and repeat. She sounds like a nightmare. Why did you give her chocolate mouse anyway? Worse than gravy

I dont mind her trying abit of different foods. She has tried abit of chocolate before. I know its not going to harm her. But its on my terms not someone elses , which is annoying and getting to me

At 7 months old . is pureed veg enough ?

I often put a bit of gravy in the puree at that age. Just a little, and lots of cooked vegetables and boiled water. It was fine.

Your baby though. Just tell her no if you don't want it given.

Im a first time mum , so ive been upping her pureed veg. Shes only recently learned to put food to her mouth , sp she has alot of melty snacks and some fruit also

Why can’t she have some of the roast? If you were doing baby led weaning she’d be gumming on the veg / the meat etc anyway? The amount of gravy she will ingest is so tiny it won’t make any odds.

What's wrong with a bit of, say chicken, potato and veg? It would seem like a pretty normal meal for a baby to me.
It might be helpful when visiting to let her eat some of your host's food, saves you a job.

I think I agree with your DM. At 7 months your DD can have mash and a bit of gravy no problem. Maybe not salty gravy every day but now and again it is fine. It would get your DD used to other flavours and textures.

Why can't she have the chicken and potato?
Other ideas if you haven't the assertive skill set are dont go to mils at mealtimes.

Salty gravy isn't ideal but a 7 month old needs to eat more than veg.

Your mil should respect your parenting decisions and not make a fuss if she makes a suggestion and you say no.

But for what it’s worth, I would agree with her that a bit of mashed potato and gravy is fine for a 7 month old. Probably not for every meal, but as a one off. We did a mix of purée and finger foods both times for weaning so I’d spoon feed them some veg or whatever and then let them chew on a bit of cheese or chicken or toast or veg sticks. A roast dinner is perfect for those things

The only issue surely is the salt content in the gravy why couldn't she have the mash and veg 🤷🏽‍♀️

What I get from this post is maybe im over reacting ? Im a first time mum , and ive been signed off from any HV care so information online can be very conflicting. I give my baby girl lots of different veggies & snacky foods , so I guess some gravy isnt going to hurt her. I feel better about her having it now :) thanks

It is confusing....and HVs come out with corners such as “they should eat what you eat”, while at the same time sucking their teeth about the evils of Petits Filous. I think chicken, roast potatoes etc are quite a good idea for moving on after the first bits of puréed veg; I’d have turned down the gravy as well, although possibly just because I hate it myself!

Corners? Corkers, I meant. Corkers!

Its all so confusing. Im also abit worried about giving her chicken incase she chokes ?? She doesnt have any teeth. To be honest BLW scares me abit.

I think like everything else you do what's best for you - if you want to give home made purées then do that, if you want to do BLW then that's fine too
Given that you aren't meant to start until they're 6 month, it's odd that people are suggesting that by 7 months purée isn't going to be enough for your baby
With my first I was similar to you in that I didn't want to give anything that wasn't pure and made by me, although I only did purée for two weeks then BLW. But I never gave gravy till she was over 2, so I get it. Yeh it won't kill her, but there's absolutely no need to give her these things if you don't want to.
Stick to your guns, do what you think is right for your baby and when the time comes to move onto the next stage, I'm sure you'll do great with it

I should also add with my second we were much more lax, he ate/eats anything and everything and so far neither one of them is more or less healthy than the other

She doesn’t need teeth, just let her gum it! You’ll be surprised at what they can do.

Dont give her the salty gravy. People are saying the chicken and mash, not the gravy.
Health visitors cover till age 5, you don't get signed off from them. You can still use them ilfir advice.

We have a 9 month old DS, at 7 months I'd have been fine with the mash, veg and meat, but definetly not gravey, it's very salty for a baby, even now we don't give him salty foods like that!

First time mums are much more worried about these things than mothers with 2, 3 or more. Understandable, but all the children will thrive - notwithstanding chicken, gravy, chocolate mouse. It's all grist to their mill and the more variety the better.