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Parenting

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Original poster

To breastfeed or not to breastfeed

76 replies

MUMTOBE7 · 20/05/2019 22:16

Hi im 36 weeks pregnant and have being dead set on not Breastfeeding as i have tiny nipple which is going to make it more difficult and the thought makes me shudder also my fella is not fond on the idea, but recently i have being questioning my decision and in stuck any advice

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Ravingstarfish · 20/05/2019 22:18

I never wanted to breastfeed but my son had different ideas, I was lucky that it ended up coming naturally to us both.
It is really good for you and baby so give it a go, you can always change to formula if you can’t bare it

allergyhelpnewbaby · 20/05/2019 22:19

I have never heard of small nipples causing a problem.

You can always just give it a go and see how feel about it. It does not mean that you won’t bottle feed as well or that you will breast feed for a long time .

Sculpin · 20/05/2019 22:20

Tiny nipples isn't a problem - mine are small and I had no trouble breastfeeding. A new-born's mouth is very small!

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redbedheadd · 20/05/2019 22:21

If your partner doesn't support you, it's likely you will find it difficult. If you mean you have flat ish or small nipples I'd recommend nipple shields, I use them for this reason. I love BF but it's hard work so you have to really commit

Echobelly · 20/05/2019 22:21

I also have small nipples, and innies at that. But I always remember one great comment from a nurse - 'It's breastfeeding, not nipple feeding, it's nothing to do with the size of your nipples!'

TBH, I couldn't make it work with DD, which was nothing to do with my nipples. And it took a few painful weeks to work with her little brother and it was great after that. My sister (also small boobs/nipples) managed to bf straight away with no trouble whatsoever.

I would totally recommend bfing if it works for you, I would also totally recommend bottlefeeding if bf doesn't work for you, or even if you just really don't want to and it ikks you out, and not looking back or feeling any guilt or regret because either way you are nourishing and loving your baby and being a great mum.

Stormwhale · 20/05/2019 22:22

I dont think your nipple size will cause a problem. Really you want the baby to have a good mouthful of breast tissue rather than just sucking on the nipple.

Give it a go. Before I had dd I couldn't imagine breastfeeding, but it felt completely natural once she was born. Unfortunately it didn't work out but I'm very glad I tried at least. Currently pregnant with dc2 and am really hopeful we can get it to work this time.

AlexaShutUp · 20/05/2019 22:23

Why is your partner not keen? Presumably, he knows that it's the best option for your dc? Fair enough if you don't want to do it for whatever reason, it's your body, but I don't really understand what his preferences have to do with it.

Lucylou321 · 20/05/2019 22:23

Sounds like your fella needs to realise it's not really about him and it's about your baby who is going to benefit from breast milk! There's no harm in giving it a go. I would also recommend trying nipple shields if you struggle, they allowed me to breastfeed when I wouldn't have been able to otherwise.

Emelene · 20/05/2019 22:24

Worth looking at, and even to get the first milk - colostrum - for your baby is so beneficial. I'm still breastfeeding my 6 month old and I love it. So glad I did it.

TapasForTwo · 20/05/2019 22:25

It has nothing to do with your partner. If you want to breastfeed don't be afraid to ask for help. I had loads of support from the midwives at hospital when DD wouldn't feed.

ChesterDrawsDoesntExist · 20/05/2019 22:25

I'd say give it a good go, you've got nothing to lose and you might find it's something you feel really comfortable with.

Crabbitstick · 20/05/2019 22:25

It is your business/choice how you feed. I’d be concerned about your partners attitude - what’s his issue.

For thousands of years babies have fed from all sorts of shaped nipples. Don’t assume you can’t.

BF is tricky for most people for the first few days - getting baby to latch, getting comfortable. It takes patience, time, perseverance.

The pay off is that once you get the hang of it, it is brilliant (well it has been for me). It is convenient, now it is easy. No prep, no sterilising, no getting properly up in middle of night, no carrying about bottles, no having to pay! It is also really good for helping your baby bump disappear.

Those are all the benefits beyond the already well documented benefits to baby.

If you want to do it then commit yourself, read about it, speak to midwife, watch videos on latch etc - be ready to overcome early day hurdles.

That said every breastfeed someone gives their baby is worthwhile, even if you only do a day, a week, a month.

I think it is an amazing thing and absolutely love it. Not everyone has that experience though.

MumUnderTheMoon · 20/05/2019 22:27

I know women who have breastfed, I breastfed for the first few days and then switched to formula and I know women who are dead set against it. Do what suits you and your baby without reference to anyone else, including your fella.

Oct18mummy · 20/05/2019 22:28

I got told I had flat nipples - never realised I had! Anyway it took longer to get latch sorted however we got there and seven months on my nipples are no longer flat due to all the sucking! It’s so easy not having to remember to take all the bottle paraphernalia when you go out or in the middle of the night. Pros and cons to both just do what is best for you and baby. Good luck

YouLikeTheBadOnesToo · 20/05/2019 22:29

If you’re undecided you may as well give it a go. If it’s not for you / doesn’t work out then you can always switch to bottle feeding, there’ll be no harm done (combination feeding is also an option). At least that way you’ll never regret not trying it.

I breastfed, it was hard at times but I love it (still going at almost 2, although it’s pretty much just morning, nap and bedtime feeds now).

If you do want to give it a try, please make sure your partner supports you. It’ll be more difficult if he’s not on board.

stucknoue · 20/05/2019 22:29

Nipple size makes no difference. Evidence shows that breastfeeding even for just a week or two is beneficial, with anything up to 2 years having increasing advantages. It's a shame your dp doesn't want what's best

TillyTheTiger · 20/05/2019 22:30

I definitely recommend trying it then seeing how you feel. The benefits are very well-documented, not just for baby but for you too (lower risks of various cancers etc).
The main reason I loved it was because once I'd learned to feed lying down, when baby woke in the night I could just shove a boob in his mouth and doze (we safely co-slept), instead of having to drag myself out of bed and downstairs to make a bottle. It also made leaving the house easier as I knew I always had a way of feeding when out and about, so didn't need to worry about how much formula to take with us etc.

Original poster

MUMTOBE7 · 20/05/2019 22:31

My partner supports what i want to do he just gets a bit weirded out by it just like i do my friend breastfeeds her 5month old and i can bare to see it i i don't know why as its completely natural, yeah my nipple are flat so thought the baby would not be able to latch on.

OP posts:

Original poster

MUMTOBE7 · 20/05/2019 22:31

Cant bare to see it.

OP posts:

Cinnamonsteamer · 20/05/2019 22:32

Clearly, probably reasonably fairly indisputably, breast is 'medically' best. However, there are many, many choices you will make for your baby in the next 18 years. Some of these may be technically 'better' than others, by various barometers/opinions. Some of these will work well for you and your personal situation, and some will not.

Do what you feel is best. You rather than your DP 'not being keen'- you are the one with breasts!

All the best with whatever you decide

MollysMummy2010 · 20/05/2019 22:35

I tried and failed. Tiny inverted nipples, tiny prem baby. No guilt at all. I expressed for about three weeks as I had time as she was is NCU but then it was formula. she is 9 and nearly taller than me after being born at 4lb4.

Crabbitstick · 20/05/2019 22:37

Hope links work - shows a newborn latching without intervention. Just laid on mum and they work it out. Think it is just beautiful!

Vinorosso74 · 20/05/2019 22:39

Give it a go. It can be hard at first but there is support our there; BF support groups, online, over the phone etc. However once the first few weeks are over it gets easier. Nipple size isn't an issue.
I'm more concerned your partner is weirded out by it.....

happymummy12345 · 20/05/2019 22:41

I never wanted to even try it so I didn't and I've never regretted it at all. And I won't be trying it if I have more children.
You need to do what you feel is best for you. No one can make that decision other than you

stillworkingitout · 20/05/2019 22:45

I was fairly ambivalent and open minded about breast v formula until my dc1 arrived and then feeding him became the number 1 important thing for me. It was definitely not easy, we battled with tongue tie, reflux, and oversupply. But we got there. And good job too as he actually had a cows milk allergy. The benefits to you and to baby are indisputable, so if it’s something you can make work then do keep at it. I know how you feel, I don’t think I was especially fond of watching babies feeding before I had my own, now I love a little watch of a latched on baby having a good feed - just magic!

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