battles at the dinner table with a 3 year old....

[BellaVictoria]

my husband and I are not quite sure as to how to handle this new chapter
we've tried holding her to eating everything on her plate or else she goes on time out & misses her "yummy" afterward.....not quite working! We've read, and have not tried yet, letting her eat what she wants off her plate without stressing what or how much she should eat and accepting when she says she's done.....we don't know about this...since we think we she needs her nutrition....she does get a vitamine every day.....and she is used to getting a "yummy" after her meals.....a reward for being a good girl....we also don't know how to get out of that routine, if we let her decide how much she'll eat, we definitely don't agree with giving her a reward for a half eaten meal Thanks ahead of time for your input.......this website has help us tons in our 4 years on it!!!!!!

no, it probably is bad, im just trying to rack my brains for ideas for you.

Its not something that i do. Honestly though the imaginary play stuff works on my child and on my nieces and nephews.

Like you said earlier, this is the latest in the chapter, i just think "whats next" if its not getting shoes on in the morning, its getting in the bath or going to sleep.
Its a constant battle as they gain independance and develop fantastic imaginations.

the timer does sound good.
Do you have an alarm clock?

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ha!ha! isn't that the truth!!!

Not that I'm advocating bargaining, but that's where we seem to be at with dS1, now.
Him: "I've had enough"
Me: "10 more spoonfuls then"
Him "No - five"
Me: "Well, five and backwards then"
Him (victoriously): "OK"

(and as we count 1,2,3,4,5 - 5,4,3,2,1,0 and "one for good luck" he gets 12 spoonfuls which invariably finishes the meal!)

He's 6 now and I can't believe he still falls for it!

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3 year-olds are the champion wind-up merchants, and expert prevaricators.

Drop the battle. As soon as she senses that there is any issue at all for you in whether she eats or not, she will play it. So drop all your interst or anxiety over this completely.

And definitley drop the 'yummy' business. Food is food - pudding is simply a different kind of food after the first lot. If you call it 'yummy' it immediately sets up the idea that anything else must be 'not yummy'. And if you set it up as a reward, then a reward is something you get for doing something hard or unpleasant. Not simply eating enjoyable food.

I am speaking from bitter experience here. I am sure DS ate next to nothing as a 3 year-old, and I stressed, angsted...everything. Then I stopped. Then DS started calming down and eating. Once, in the middle of his spag bol, he spotted a packet of buttons on the worktop, and asked for one. I gave him one. He ate it, and he carried on eating his spag bol.

yes!
Absolutely, mine does this..not much for a few days then eating every thing in sight for a day.
Works out ok.
He is a healthy weight, rarely ill, full of energy and bright as a button.

thanks oops!!! sounds good!

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isn't it terrible how we can be our mothers???? even when we swore we would not become them???? One thing I have always loved about this chatline....I see myself very clearly!!! and I don't like it!!!!! Which means, neither does she!!!!! ha!ha! time to settle down! Thanks for the reality check!

My lovely Ds is perfect in every way, he is nearly 2 and i am so proud of all the things he can do, but the one little thing that he doesn't do is eat, he seriously lives on air pies. He is very healthy, strong as an ox and developing really well, but that one little thing that he doesn't do drives me barmy why is it that we get so hung up on them eating when they are clearly doing really well!!!