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Parenting

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Original poster

Is it natural to always want ‘just one more’?

47 replies

BillywigStings · 03/11/2018 20:11

I have two kids and am totally happy though I still have yearnings for another! If I keep popping them out, will there come a point where I feel content, or will I always be yearning for ‘just one more?’

I ask because I don’t want to get pregnant again if it’s just hormones or something making me want more - if I truly feel our family is incomplete, then that’s fine though. It’s just hard to tell the difference

OP posts:

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flossietoot · 03/11/2018 20:13

I have two and know I don’t want any more and rarely get any yearnings!

KoshaMangsho · 03/11/2018 20:13

Nope. I really didn’t want a second but I felt broody and had no 2. And I am done. He’s 2 and I have never felt broody at any time in these two years. So no it’s not the norm!

Ragwort · 03/11/2018 20:16

Not normal for me, even before my DC was born I knew I would never, ever want another.

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Havalina · 03/11/2018 20:16

I had two and felt like someone was missing. Had ds2 and was done.

I look back now I'm older and can't relate to broody me at all

SoyDora · 03/11/2018 20:18

Pregnant with my third and 99% sure I won’t want another after this one.

nancy75 · 03/11/2018 20:19

One was enough for me, never considered a second. On the other hand my Dad is 1 of 14 children, so I’m guessing my Nan always wanted just one more

Onatreebyariver · 03/11/2018 20:19

I felt strongly like that when I had two.

Now I have three I’m so busy I never have time to yearn for one more

I think you know when you’re done and when you’re not.

Hedgehog80 · 03/11/2018 20:20

I felt so strongly about ‘just one more’ I had 5 Ivfs then my sterilisation reversal

shecamefromgreece · 03/11/2018 20:22

Nope I've got four and I'm done. I look at a babies and think aaah so cute but I think that about lion cubs I wouldn't want either though

LoniceraJaponica · 03/11/2018 20:24

For some women, yes. For many, no.

swampytiggaa · 03/11/2018 20:26

I’ve got five and honestly would have had more. Youngest is 10 now and the yearning lessened from when she was about 3 and became less dependent on me.

LaPufalina · 03/11/2018 20:27

I had SPD and insomnia in my second pregnancy alongside a toddler, and I'm almost 40 so not going again. Still got big pangs folding away the newborn stuff for the second and last time!

DonkeyPunch88 · 03/11/2018 20:27

I've had four and I'm still very broody but realistically 5 is not gonna happen as financially and logistically it would be a nightmare. I love the newborn stage though and it's over so quickly I think that's the bit I crave. I probably would just keep going if I let my heart decide!

GiveMyHeadPeaceffs · 03/11/2018 20:32

I had one, my ds, and never seriously wanted another.

onemouseplace · 03/11/2018 20:37

I knew I wanted another after DC2 but after DC3 was born I knew I was done. I have friends who felt that way after DC1 or 2.

Oddly enough, it was DH who said that if all else was equal, he would happily have had DC4 or more.

3kidsandmore · 03/11/2018 20:55

This is a worry I have! I have three currently, the youngest still a baby. I really want / hope to have a fourth at some point (our eldest also nags for this and is great with the younger ones) but the environmental impact and being over populated makes me feel guilty for having three already!

I also don't want to have a fourth and still long for another else it'll never end. Will watch this thread with interest.

MadeForThis · 03/11/2018 21:05

I have 2. Dd2 is only 10 months but from she was born I've been thinking about dc3. It can't just be wanting to have a new baby because she is still a baby.

I honestly feel like I will never stop wanting another and do wonder if it's hormones.

Keep having very logical discussions with DH about the implications of having a dc3. Home and car size, finances being shared amongst 3. Holidays. University.

But the desire for dc3 doesn't go away.

What further challenges me is my age. I'm 39 this month. Scared of the dangers of getting pregnant again. Losing a pregnancy. Disability and what that would mean for our DD's.

People keep telling me that you can only regret it if you don't try.

So scared of making the wrong decision. Or even scared of having dc3 and still feeling the same. Wanting another. Don't have the luxury of time to do that.

flapjackfairy · 03/11/2018 21:11

I am mid 50s with 3 birth children , a long term foster child and an adopted 4 yr old. I am permanently broody still !
I have an excess of maternal instinct for sure !

FlipFlapBat · 03/11/2018 21:18

Felt like that after my first, after my second I knew I was done. DC2 is 2.5 now and recently I was with a group of women who were going mad over a tiny baby. I had zero broody feelings, nothing. I have no desire for a third.

Original poster

BillywigStings · 03/11/2018 21:36

This is quite interesting actually. Seems to be a mix! I’m glad @3kidsandmore mentioned environmental impact , I thought it was just me that felt guilty for that on top of everything else (less attention to go around, finances etc)

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PlayingForKittens · 03/11/2018 21:42

I really wanted my 3rd. It was so strange but when I was out with the 2 kids and calling them or gathering them up, grabbing their hands in the street etc I would look for the 3rd child and have a split second of wondering where they were before realising I only had 2. It stopped as soon as I became pregnant with number 3. 3rd is 6 now and while I have occasional pangs at never giving birth again or breastfeeding again or snuggling a newborn I don't want another child at all.

schopenhauer · 03/11/2018 22:18

I feel the same way as you op, I know it is more sensible for us to stop now at 2 dc but I still sometimes feel broody for another one, but then sometimes think it is better with just two. Friends have announced they are definitely done after two but I don’t feel like that... it’s just having a third would make life harder in many ways! And then what if I wanted four?! I don’t think I would but you don’t know I guess. What does your partner think? Dh is happy to stop but occasionally says he wouldn’t mind a 3rd.

hamburgers · 03/11/2018 22:23

Interesting thread.

I'm pregnant with DC2 and already thinking about No.3 but realistically it won't work for us financially and I have to get used to the idea of stopping at 2 which is really really hard

lulabaloo · 03/11/2018 22:27

I had 2 boys and after each i always felt i wanted 1 more, then had my 3rd, a girl. Now i don't feel broody anymore. Not sure if its because i have a girl now that i feel my family is complete, or that its hard going from 2-3 so has put me off.

slappinthebass · 03/11/2018 22:29

I used to wonder this too and felt I'd always be broody. But I genuinely feel done after my third. Youngest is only 2, so maybe I'll change my mind, but I don't think so.

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