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Original poster

ROAR Toddler group nightmare ROAR

46 replies

colditz · 21/05/2007 10:35

I am so so tolerant of mothers who have difficult to handle children.

But I walked out of a toddler group in a strop after 25 minutes this morning, because my 13 monther had been physically attacked 3 TIMES by the same little girl, and had toys snatched and not replaced 8 times, again, same child, while Mumsy looked on and simpered "Oh Tilly!"

She didn't move, or anything. At one point she made the child sit in a chair, but as she got straight up and did as she pleased again without being stopped, it was pretty ineffective.

So, ROAAAAR!

(And before the pounce, I have got an older child, know very well that this is normal behavior, but it doesn't mean it shouldn't be damn well stopped!"

OP posts:

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MrsWeasley · 21/05/2007 10:39

I agree with you. If I take a child to a toddler group who was a bit of a "ahem" lively! I keep a very close eye on them and try to help them to play nicely.

Sadly I have seen many, many parents and carers just leave the children to it!

Original poster

colditz · 21/05/2007 11:01

It annoyed me so much, I have a difficult child, I know how hard it can be to stop a child rampaging, but you have to make the effort!

OP posts:

brimfull · 21/05/2007 11:05

surely the point of toddler groups is for children to LEARN how to play sociably.She is a twunt for not teaching her child properly.You may roar to your hearts content.

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WanderingTrolley · 21/05/2007 11:07

I have a blunt and stupid acquaintance, whom I try to avoid.

One day she followed me to a toddler group where there was a v boisterous, violent child with a semi comatose mother.

"Christ!" she said to his mum. "He's a right nightmare, how do you cope?"

Comatose mum never seen again. This is why I tolerate blunt and stupid acquaintance. Sometimes you need someone with the social grace of a hand grenade to state the bleedin obvious, very loudly.

Mumsy of Tilly needs a sharp slap imo.
This will be dealt out in due course by Tilly, I bet.

Original poster

colditz · 21/05/2007 11:17

But I usually am blunt and stupid aquaintance!

I di just tear my baby out of the girl's grasp and snap "Right, home time now!" and just walk out without saying goodbye.

Hmm, I'm a stroppy nightmare but really!

OP posts:

suzycreamcheese · 21/05/2007 11:20

..toddler groups ...they are just nightmare...!

did you point it out to staff / helpers?..though sometimes they are not much either but should be told..

.....comatose mum is alive and comatose everywhere ....and needs to be woken up!

wandering trolley ..i like your friend...

WanderingTrolley · 21/05/2007 11:23

My BASA once said to a small child, "Stop that right now or you'll get a smack from your mummy."

We aren't close.

Colditz, you must practise your blunt and stupid skills. The correct responce is "Lady, your kid's a right nutter, you wanna get it muzzled."

Sympathy - I hate the mums of wild kids. Always the ones to shriek loudest when Tilly is accidentally bumped into by a slightly smaller child, ime.

Original poster

colditz · 21/05/2007 11:27

There aren't really any staff, just the lady who runs the hall it's held in - it's a community project type thing. And this was my first time there in a long time. She saw my face as I left though, and had an "Oh dear" expression.
FGS, though, her child pushed mine over by the face to get at a toy he was holding, and I had to pull her off him! (Mumsy hadn't moved)
My face tells a story when I have something on my mind!

OP posts:

SueBaroo · 21/05/2007 11:32

I don't bother with them anymore. Camel-back breaking straw was when my eldest was 4 and a little boy kept thumping her, and all the mother did was laugh and say 'Boys will be boys!'

I didn't particularly want to hang about with a woman who thought it was fine for boys to smack the crap out of girls myself, let alone have my kids around hers.

Original poster

colditz · 21/05/2007 11:35

I never bothered with them with ds1, but I wanted to at least try them, but they really are hell on earth! There is nothing so awful as having someone make polite conversation with you as she watches her toddler smack the crap out of your baby!

I wanted to scream "He's not a fucking doll for her amusement, that's MY CHILD!"

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Original poster

colditz · 21/05/2007 11:37

And he's not even my ds1, he's my ds2! Had he been ds1 at 13 months old, I may very well have burned the place down as I left, or blackedher eye, or something equally atrocious.

I just don't have the right sort of personality for them, maybe.

OP posts:

AttillaTheHan · 21/05/2007 11:45

I think you have exactly the right personality. If you were not so switched on your child would have been battered by comatosed parents kid.

More needs to be said to her imo...
burning down toddler group might be a bit rash though!

suzycreamcheese · 21/05/2007 12:00

pick andchoose...if you are lucky enough to have choice..
found they can vary wildly...

ds at preschool now and i was so happy my his our days were over at these places.....

though ..did meet one nice mum who we see...not bad ratio i reckon....
they are just hell hell hell

makes me hate thinking about school and the nutjobs they will have to deal with there....

Original poster

colditz · 21/05/2007 16:08

The peron who runs the centre kncked on my door this afternoon, with my 50p! She said she picked it up and brought it back "On principle" when she realised what had happened, and than Comatose Mum is odd anyway, and always has been!

I told her she should keep the 50p, as I did make myself a cup of tea, but she says that as I didn't get chance to finish it, I shouldn't have to pay for it

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SueBaroo · 21/05/2007 16:16

Oh that's flippin brilliant. The last group I went to would have come round on the days I didn't go and asked for my subs just for the privelege of associating with them...

PinkTulips · 21/05/2007 16:23

there's a mom like that that goes to toddler group at soft play and swimming.

her little brat tried to hold dd under the water one day and has battered her repeatedly. mom is the most ineffective tool i've ever met and laughs it off so i've started saying it to him. he was being a right hooligan jumping on kids in the ball pit last week so i told him off (gently) and lo and behold he stopped!

ThisIsDavinaPleaseDoNotSwear · 21/05/2007 16:24

I think that there is a very great need for a toddler group to be set up for parents who don't do toddler groups

Go back next week and roar really loudly at the litle girl next time she comes near you, or spray her with water (it works for dogs!)

motherinferior · 21/05/2007 16:25

Look on the bright side. When Tilly is 14, oooh, she will be an uncontrollable nightmare brat. Even worse than, er, all other 14 year olds. And you will look on as her mother wrings her hands pathetically and repress a not so silent snigger.

rowan1971 · 21/05/2007 16:32

My response in these situations is to speak pretty sharply to the child, on the basis that somebody ought to let them know that their behaviour isn't on. Little Jemima-Epiphany's mummy is usually so surprised that she forgets to call me on it. It is also tremendously cathartic, in the way that only yelling at defenceless small children can be.

bobsmum · 21/05/2007 16:36

I freaked on a toddler (about 2.5) this morning having watched this child systematically lay into every other one there including the 3 and 4 y o children. Very vicious and unprovoked - really random.

So when the child pushed dd over so tat she actually flew across the room (for the third time) I went right down to him, put my hand policeman style in front of him and said "No Pushing!" really loudly - but more for the parent's benefit than the child's I suppose. Parent finally noticed and made 2.5 y o say sorry.

I'm normally pretty good at being anonymous at toddler groups, but I'd had enough this morning because this has been going on for weeks.

Agree with taking on blunt and stupid training. I'm signing up tonight

franca70 · 21/05/2007 16:40

This why I don't do toddlers group. There should be a small set of rules all mothers should stick to, in order to really help the children to learn how to play together/ respect each other/ be sociable.

bettybobo · 23/05/2007 17:32

i went to a toddlers group or was it that tinygym doodaa, and was the most painful hour i have spent in a dingy room. And i had to pay a ridiculous amount for it. Needless to say i never went back.
plus they had someone offering to take photos of one's preciousnessses for a fee.
omg made me wish for the beaches where i grew up and children ran around free and sandy.

Original poster

colditz · 23/05/2007 20:24

Precioussnessssessss

OP posts:

bettybobo · 23/05/2007 20:37

colditz

kitbit · 24/05/2007 20:56

I have been practising a very useful roar: "WHOOOOOOSE IS THIS CHILD???" which I have now used several times at soft play. ds loves it so much I don't want to be driven away by little hooligans so am campaigning to stop little horrors being little and horrible near my toddler. Am making myself quite unpopular with the resident clique of dozy-mums but have noticed some quiet looks of secret gratitude and delight from some of the mothers of other trampled children.
Have also noticed that some of the littler children follow me around to play near me as I watch ds, I think I have become a sort of toddler bodyguard

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