Benign neglect. . .

[ahundredtimes]

Is there a handbook on this parenting style? Is it just another way of saying I can't be bothered or would all our dcs be happier if we dropped the endless activities and interest in their blardy spelling homework and took up being benignly nelectful.

If you call the book happy accident maybe the 1st chapter should be about conception?

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DS goes to nursery 2 days so I can work, and playgroups 3 mornings a week (I mean the sort where mums stay with kids) but the rest of the time he's poaying about in the house or running around in the park. Now he's 2.8 I find I can chat more with other parents and don't have to be within a hand's reach of him all the time.
I'm derfinitely of the opinion that kids need time to work out what to do with themselves: after all, the whole point of raising them is that they go away from you.

I'm also with Twiglet. I don't think they need to be entertained every secong - i love listening to my children play, they think of way more interesting things than I can I don't like those car dvd thingys either but...went on a car trip with a friend and our ds's -got stuck in horrendous traffic, and I must admit that it was heavenly that the Sith, and their vengeful ways were keeping the boys entertained - I had enough on my plate making sure dh didn't pop an artery on the m6 !!

A happy little boy is probadly a grubby one.
my little boy was very grubby and very happy after an afternoon pottering around at the cricket club.today hes learnt to kick a ball and has been more confident and less clingy there than he is at any of the "childrens" stuff I take him to. at Hueristic play all he wants to do is sit on my feet :-) so I let him.

I started this thread and then went away for the weekend. . . I benignly neglected this thread.
Well, I think we're all very healthy. Does anyone ever post on MN and say, we do five musical instruments, I interfere with my children's lives on a constant basis and push them to do well in all areas in which I failed? Probably not, hence Paranoid Parenting probably. Shall go find that book. Darn, must throw away first chapter of Happy Accident, and go launch whole new parenting style.
Where's Cod? She's going big with that american one.

I think this is what used to be called "normal parenting" before the overachievers took over with the after school activities, a number of which don't even seem to be beneficial to the children so much as therapeutic to the parents.

i.e the mother and baby singalong types where the Mums sit and sing nursery rhymes to the kids. I find it hard to believe that people actually PAY to sit in a room and provide their own entertainment to their children. Loopy!

I spent long hours as a child in the garden sailing upside down flowers (fairies) on leaves (boats) across the pond to talk to the frog king, or swaddling up the poor dog and wheeling him round in my pram, or drawing pictures on the yard floor with chalk, whatever. Saying you were bored was treated like a dirty word in our house, and usually resulted in Dad saying "Go and tidy your room then!"

I think I'd like my children to do at least one sporty activity a week, (since both sides of our family are prone to putting on weight) plus swimming. Other than that just playing with friends is enough after school I think, unless they express a huge interest in something.