I dropped my baby - guilt

[PleaseAndThanks]

Tripped over a toy whilst holding 6mo DD, couldn’t right myself and she ended up falling about a foot and hitting the back of her head hard.

I’ve taken her to A&E and she’s fine in herself, no loss of consciousness or vomiting so they are happy for us to just keep an eye on her at home.

But I feel a bit hysterical. Partly with worry (I’m medical myself so have seen what
It is that they are worried about!) but just so guilty that I dropped her :( can’t stop going over it in my head and beating myself up.

Don’t know why I’m writing. Not for reassurance that she’ll be ok but more for reassurance that this doesn’t make me a horrific parent?

The first time you hurt them is awful. I remember making DH cut DS1's nails and he cut his finger and drew blood. I don't think DH has ever forgiven hiemself for that. When DS1 was brand- new I used to bang his head on the living room door every time I walked though it. Every time. Then when he was 6 months old he rolled off the bed and banged his head on the bedside table so badly I had to get his head x rayed. When he was 2 my friend's cat clawed his face about a centimetre away from his eye in an totally unprovoked attack (and I was suprising DS properly). He still has the scar from that.

Unfortunately, these things happen despite all our best intentions and regardless of that, they'll still idolise you until they turn 12 and then think you are the most useless person on the planet

Oh you poor thing 🌹
You are going to get loads of mums reply with similar stories I bet. I dropped mine head first once, I was so exhausted and she just slid out of my arms. She's a teenager now!

Your baby is fine and so are you, these things really do happen and happen to loads of parents.

I fell carrying DD (about 9 months at the time) out to the car and we both hit the driveway, hard. I was absolutely distraught and she was totally fine!
I kept hearing the thud for weeks after!

Don’t be too hard on yourself OP, it’s the most sickening feeling, but it’s not your fault.

I’ve also nicked their fingers while cutting their nails!

We've all done similar stuff. Accidents happen - rolling off beds, falling down the stairs still feel bad about that one

I put 5 month old DD on our bed, bent down to pick up my leggings, and she dived face first onto the floor. I was hysterical, as was she, I think these things have pretty much happened at some point to all of us, so don't be so hard on yourself.

Be kind to yourself, it was an accident and your baby will be absolutely fine.

I fell down the stairs whilst carrying DC1 who was 9 months ish (and pregnant with DC2)..it was a long drop onto a very hard floor and a very big me landed on top of him. It was awful, but it was a freak accident, just like yours. We were all ok in the end just very shaken and upset, as I imagine you are. Please, don't beat yourself up, it's pointless and none of it is a reflection on you.

I left my baby on the sofa, surrounded by cushions, to get her lunch. I saw her launch her self in the air and land on her head on the floor. I have never felt so sick in my life.

She is 48 this year, no lasting damage, except she still loves the Mum who allowed th is to happen😊😊.

It's ok OP, stuff happens. I know how you feel, all these years later and I still cringe when I think of it.

DH kicked tiny ds off the bed when the rest of us were tickling him. He was launched across the room, head first into the wardrobe.

Accidents happen OP, my DS1 rolled off the sofa when he was a few months old, I was definitely more upset than him. Your baby is fine, try to forget about it, are you ok did you hurt yourself? You definitely aren’t an horrific parent.

My nanny dropped me as a newborn, she's never forgiven herself and even now, 25 years later.. she won't hold a newborn unless she's properly sitting down!

Please don't beat yourself up about it.

DS fell off the bed /sofa 3 times before he was one
One of my cousin's was dropped down the stairs (she's ok, and in her 20s now)

These things happen, I'm sure you're a great mum

I tripped on a curb carrying dd last month! Thankfully she was in her car seat to the time but as I fell I knocked the seat sideways and basically rolled over the top of it. SHe was fine and I burst into tears thinking I’d crushed her and also imaginings what if she wasn’t but in the seat. It happens to everyone at some point, as long as all is okay then don’t beat yourself up over it, it was an accident pure and simple.

I was lying on my bed with DS when he was 5 weeks. He was pretty chilled so decided to cut his nails. Managed to drop the nail clippers from mid air as I was opening them, with the sharp bit bouncing off his eyeball.

He was fine thank fuck - cried for about 10 seconds, and had a minor scratch on his eyeball which the eye specialist gave us drops for.

DH still makes me cut his nails though.

Yeah eight month olds high chair toppled over last week with her inside it. A&e trip required. She was fine. What a state I was in though

Oh the guilt is real! When dd was a week old I banged her head against the door frame. She screamed, I howled and phoned my mum in a panic. She was fine of course.

6 months she rolled off my bed while I closed my eyes for a millisecond and smashed her face on the next2me feet. Blood from her nose, massive bump on her forehead. Had to take her to hospital to get her checked over, I was hysterical for that one.

Couple of days ago she had crawled right behind me and I stood on her little hand 😭 felt terrible. It happens op! It’s not deliberate, and babies tend to bounce quite well. Have a glass of wine tonight and know you’re a lovely mum, you wouldn’t feel guilty if you weren’t

Thanks everyone for the hand hold

DH (who has been forced into this by hysterical me) and I are going to take shifts staying up to keep an eye on her (via monitor) to make sure she’s not sick. Probably OTT but that’s me for you!

This could be quite outing but I dropped 6 week old DD on a marble staircase, from chest height. I tripped on my flip flops. I was a brand new expat in a foreign country. It gives me shivers still. DD was concussed but fine.

They are called accidents for a reason - we can't wrap them in cotton wool - though it has sure as hell made me super cautious of her fragility.

The feelings of guilt will fade but the experience will stay with you. Those days observing her in hospital were the worst of my life.

I dropped my phone on my DD's face when she was sleeping... tried getting her to latch on to the breast whilst she was screaming then realised I was bending her arm back. DH was playing with her & twisted her arm... she screamed a lot. Felt bloody awful every time, even cried when I hurt her arm. But all total accidents obviously, don't worry about it OP, you're only human

Bastard expensive pram collapsed while pushing 5 month old DC in it while crossing a road and bumping up on to the pavement. Was so sleep deprived l hadn't clicked everything into place. The guilt from that was awful. Thankfully no cars about and v lovely people came to our aid and helped sort us out- I was massive snottery mess and some lovely builders helped me get pram righted and passing mum called me. The guilt l still have from my lack of checking is still there.

Not called calmed!

My mum was playing a game with me when I was about 2, it was a regular game where she threw me on the bed and tickled me.

One day she had got new silky bedding, she threw me, in my silk pyjamas on the bed and I just glided over the bed and off the other side where I hit my head on the dresser. She didn't think about the silk on silk!

I'm 21 and she still bangs on about the guilt!

@snewname that made me snort!

Oh OP you must be traumatised. Accidents happen. I'm glad baby's ok.

DD1 was 11 months old when I stupidly pulled up her leggings from the back, she went face first into the wooden floor at my DM's house and bit through her tongue (luckily no stitches). I absolutely shit myself, blood was everywhere felt awful for weeks afterwards.

We've all been there OP. 😀

Three kids and have far ,far too many accident horror stories to relate including phoning my mum in a panic at 11pm because ds1 had managed to piss in his ear .

These things happen, OP. You've done all the right things. In the very vast majority of cases it's OK.

I put 12 month old DD down on the seat on the bus beside me, then turned to give DS a snack, letting go of DD as I did it. At just the wrong moment, the bus driver had to slam the brakes on, and DD went flying off the seat and broke her arm. I'm glad she was my second, because at least I was somewhat inured to injuries by 4 years of living with my DS at that point. It was awful though. Not for her, she was totally fine once she had some paracetamol and a cast, but I was definitely traumatised! Holding her still for the xray was pretty unpleasant for both of us.
We've all been there. At least you weren't being totally irresponsible like I was!