Following the endless conversations in the car this afternoon that stressed me out beyond belief.....

[Blandmum]

.....Does anyone know how I should talk to my kids to stop them talking to me????

DD started talking at 11 months. She is now 10, and off hand, I don't think that she has ever stopped talking

DS2 talks constantly to get attention (youngest of 3). At a recent visit to a farm with a group of mostly old people, we were told that women who might be pregnant should not go in the field with the sheep. DS2 looked pointedly at me and shouted out 'yeah mum' very loudly so everyone looked at me. Well past the age of procreation but was so embarrassed.

there is a cohort of women wandering around the country giving the impression of being sane - but are actually a mental wreck as a result of their offspring's constant wittering.

I have 3 - I am a fully signed up member of the aforementioned club.

I also wish frequently that the word mummy/mum had never been invented.

DS1 and DS2 do organised shouting which is a bit wearing. You know, one starts going "ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh" at the tops of their voices, the other joins in, and they manage to do it without pausing for breath at the same time, meaning there is a wall of unbroken sound for as long as they are enjoying it. Which is Ages.

So that might be why I quite like the wittering.

I had forgotten - my twins sit on the car shouting "stop talking" at each other, and then once they do stop talking they complain that they have forgotten what they wanted to say because the other was talking.

DS3 is 3 and talks endlessly. He does that thing of starting a question and getting a little further into it with each breath.

" Mummy.... um Mummy why do...er um...Mummy why do people...why..people....Oh TRACTOR! Mummy why do people need to have ....why...Mummy why do people need to have some legs?"

This is the sort of thing he asks me as I'm trying to negotiate a tricky junction or roundabouit.

Thank you to whoever suggested the Charlie and Lola audio cd for the car. It was delivered today and I managed to househunt (5 houses and a 3hr car journey) with my 4yr old ds without being driven mad

Hey is this a things they say in the car thread?

The 3 yr old said: mamma can you read this book to me?
Delores said: No I'm driving.
3yr old: You can read it in the mirror.

My DD never stops talking either - I am very relieved to find that we are not alone! (And I used to think I talked a lot.)
I still remember the time when I had picked her up from Nursery and we were driving home and she asked me if we could play hide and seek in the car!!!!!

I have 2 dds aged 7 and 2 1/2 neither shut up ever, they both talk in hteir sleep, and they shout shut up, shut up at each other with increasing volume when we are in the car in an attempt to be the one that is "chatting" to mummy, I do a school run with 6 children and the other 4 are all quiet all the time...the latest from my 2 1/2 year old was a 20 minut monologue on her bottom and poo....and the 7 year old has started singing everythin in a sort of bad operatic fashion...i am driven to gin at 5 pm everyday.

A moments insight from ds3 (3.7) yesterday...
"Mummy,it goes all quiet when I stop talking"

So it does.

To anyone who thinks it gets better when they are teens- it doesn't

The two youngest (17 and 15) still compete in the car to get the most out. Mostly it's wittering. DS1 (19) talks at me and doesn't pause for breath. Sometimes I could weep it's so boring. If I say "oh I like this song" or "I want to listen to the news/ traffic report" and turn the radio up, they get louder

(I have been known to beg them to pleeaasse stop talking. Then they look all hurt and surprised)

LOL sugarfree

Witterers - OH yes I have two of those.

Many's the day when we arrive at school and it's all I can do not to lay my weary head on the steering wheel and weep because at least one of them will be gone until 3pm.

Ds - "I taw a ne naw mummy, a ne naw, MUMMY A NE NAW, NE NAW MUMMMY, NE NAW" on and on until I acknowledge it - we pass a police station to get to school every day.

And yes I also agree to stuff because I'm not listening but say "Yes DD, ok DD".

How I do not drive straight at the nearest brick wall is a mystery to me.

DS 1 and 2 could talk a a glass eye to sleep.
I have develpoed a sort of neutral ' hmmm' or 'aahhhhh' which I use throughout their conversations so I don't actually take in what they are saying - they don't notice.
I do worry though that they will bore poeple to tears when they grow up as they both think that everything they say is so interesting.
Do the driving thing to Aloha' Will you be quiet I cannot reverse the car with you wittering away in my ears.'

Which mumsnetter was it that started car journeys with a bag of sweets on her lap. Everytime the dc asked if they were nearly there yet, or argued, she chucked a sweet out the window. Any sweets left on arrival were doled out.

Damn fine idea.

I find now with teenagers, the tinny blare of three or four different ipods (one gangsta rap, one nirvana, one warbly arabic type girlie doowap) competing with the younger ones bleep bleeping gameboys/Nintendo makes wittering seem wonderfully cosy and human, epecially when you are driving for a couple of hours.When I brightly suggest switching everything off and conversing, they all look at me as though I am mad..

i'm doomed.
ds is only 20mo and he's started already.
"it's a car. it's a car. IT'S A CAR! IT'S A CAR!"

I KNOOOOOOWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!

I still shout ' ooh look a tractor/ cow/ police car' even when on my own in the car!

I do that Devioudaff. Lol
I feel quite disappointed when we pass a 'Load Exceptional' and DS is not with me. I mean I really do think -"oh ds would have loved that". Happens a lot when I'm on my way to work.

Daffodil, I do that too, LOOK! A digger!

Had my mum in the car one day. She was getting rather desperate to keep DD amused.

LOOK! TREES!

oh thank god I thought mine was the only one.

Last night - no more talking now.
Dd continues to prattle on in a whisper
"you are still talking dd"
whispers "no i'm not prattle prattle prattle"
No whispering either
quieter whispers prattle prattle prattle
DD be quiet and do not move your mouth

dd nearly combusts with the effort.
dd2 is 9 months and is never silent.

And they shout/shreik/mimic each others noises.

I am learing to drive and we have bought an in car dvd player.

Silence - it's amazing.

a 10 min taxi ride recently had the poor taxi driver looking like his ears were bleeding by the end of it.

My mum used to point things out to us constantly when we were children to keep us amused. Unfortunately she's still doing it 25+ years later. The other day when I was in the car with her (on my own for crying out loud, no kids) - "ooh, look - a police car, ooh - a butchers shop" ad strangulem Even worse is when we go on holiday and she does the same but in a bloody French accent!