Washed uniforms last night and didn't put them in the dryer

[earlgrey]

And dd1 will moan like hell 'cos I haven't got time to freeze them properly.

Any ideas?

i agree with a trial run. if it is a complete nightmare, you then have to wait all day, cross, upset or whatever for them to come home from school to settle things. I switch on pc as soon as i get up in the morning, about 7am, so I will watch out for you and do my best to be there for you. x

and also, although your situation is slightly different, I don't think there's a family in the world that wouldn't own up to some degree of meltdown on a school morning! I was so fed up with telling my dd over and over to hurry up & get up, I left her one morning. Then gently tapped her at 8 o'clock and said, 'sorry to bother you, but I'm taking mindees to school in 30 minutes, are you coming with us!!' Very mean, but very effective! (btw, it was a late start that day and i wouldn't really have made her late)

I just feel that your post itself indicates that you don't think it is right either.

It sounds as though your DDs are being 'pandered' to, and are being treated as children much younger than they actually are. Apologies if I have got the wrong end of the stick. It won't help your DD1's behaviour if they are not being encouraged to 'grow up' as it were.

School age children should be walking donwstairs, eating breakfast and getting dressed for school independently.

I think you need help to sort out the clothing issue which sounds as though it is not an isolated thing. You cannot allow children to dictate what you do.

Sorry to sound so harsh but I am troubled by yout post

OMG earlgrey, your kids have far too much control. too too much

I would never have thought of putting the uniform in the freezer earlgey. I would have told her to pack in her behaviour right now.

please dont tell me you are still buying her new soaks as well?

my reply to uniform too hot would've been 'tough, put it on' unless it had just come out the dryer then it would be 'leave it a few moments then'

i don't get the clothes in the freezer bit.

Earl Grey, Mn will always have someone here to help in the mornings.

I think you should decide what the new routine is going to be and then ( maybe together) write it down in a fun way on a large peice of paper. Then sit down together and go through it with them. Stick it up in the kitchen where it can be reffered to and STICK to it!
Tell them that uniform will be room temp and its ok to be washed. However much fuss they create just post about it on here and ride it out. They should accept it after a few days IF you stick to it.

I don't think theres much wrong with a bit of tv in the mornings.

We all get dressed upstairs and we aim to be eating breakfast at 7.30am. Sometimes we're a bit later but always by 8. If ds has been good in night (no screaming out etc) he gets to watch tv while he eats breakfast.
Then its teeth, shoes, hair and they can play till its time to go.
Bags and coats are by door ready.
If its a lunch club day I make it while they're eating breakfast.

You can make the change. You'll be so much happier.

sounds like my house mel, getting stuff ready and by the door the night before just takes some of the pressure away. there will always be someone here to help

i think I may have missed how old they are at some stage? can you remind me?

(7 & 8)

8 and 7

princessmel, I agree with you but it is only going to work if her H is also on board and doesn't use it as an opportunity to undermine her and point score. He seems to bring them down and take them off to school.

Earl grey - I've just seen this thread and wish you luck with your new start next week. FWIW I think it's the right thing to do in the long term. I have three children and I used to allow them to watch tv after b/fast as an incentive to get up. It just encouraged a general lethergy. At the beginning of this school year we 'forgot' to put the tv on, they do sometimes ask, but we say no. It has made a big difference. We also employ the infamous MN pasta jar system and whichever child is first up and dressed helps lay the table for b/fast and earns pasta as a result. The competition really helps. Most of the time the first up, dressed and breakfasted is my ds who is 4. I don't dress him, but do put his clothes out the night before as I do with dd2 (5). My 7 year old does the lot herself.

Have re-read all this this morning and some other things have crossed my mind that worry me.

She won't eat anything apart from bacon and yorkshire puddings, or spaghetti with lots (and I mean LOTS) of butter on it. That's her supper. Thank GOD she eats fruit and carrots. It wasn't always like this - when she was weaned she ate eggs, omlettes with all manner of veg stuffed in it. I just wonder that there's a pattern her, and how I can break it.

LIZS, you touched on a raw nerve when you mentioned the points scoring thing.

what do you do at meals times? do you ever say no to her?

eg have only skimmed thread, sorry (am theoretically doing tesocs shop)

are you concerned there may be sn? am guessing AS?

FWIW it sounds like she MIGHT be being, not so much stroppy, as extremely sensitive to certain tastes/sensations, which can I THINK be an AS and ?ADHD? indicator but also something that some NT kids have-my dd, for example, who seems thus far to be utterly NT .

Is there "bad" behaviour around anything else or is it limited to "sensations"?

EG I've just read through this thread - firstly poor you. Nightmare to have to deal with this thing daily. But you need help, so get some. Go to your GP and ask to be referred for famly therapy. I'm not questioning your parenting skills for one second BTW. I've had a difficult one in my house and I know it isn't easy. But freezing clothes is ridiculous and a clear sign of who is in control in your home - you need to turn the tables.
How is she at school? any problems there?

EG I didn't mean to pain you, just to acknowledge that the situation, and its suggested resolution, perhaps isn't as straightforward as it might be. Good luck.

Does your DD want all clothes out of the freezer or just her school uniform ?

I have read about children who have a sensory proccessing disorder. Do you think she really has issues with the things you have mentioned, or do you think it is controlling behaviour ?

I think the TV should go on only when they are dressed and have got themselves down the stairs as a start. It's an incentive to get through the dressing thing quickly or else they will get little or no TV.

As soon as ds was 4 whenever he asked to be carried he was told he was 4 and capable of doing it himself.

Your dd may have a medical reason for demanding new socks, frozen clothes, the same meal, however I'm pretty sure that all the therapies for that would be along the lines of gradually reteaching. So I'm not sure that just stopping will be the answer. I think you need some outside help really to advise you on a strategy.

how did it go EG ?