Am I wrong to criticise??

[ch24]

Hi everyone!! I have a 8week old girl and she's literally the best baby from day one she's sleep through the night she's a delight but when she cries like all babies do my partner loses his temper very quickly he's had 3 children and she's my first so he pretty much knows what to do but I panic when I'm not in the room and he's yelling saying stop crying he's not violent in any way and would never hurt anyone but I have patience and he doesn't am I wrong to say don't shout at my daughter cause I don't agree with it ???

He shouldn't be shouting at a 8 week old baby and I don't understand why you would put up with that.

It's not in a way I'd ever be worried about anything bad happening it's like a stressful yelling when he's reached his limit it's a stressful time but I don't think I agree with yelling !

If he's geeking continuously at a new baby who cries, then he's not a good Dad. I'd be looking at how he treats his other children. Because shouting like this is abusive behaviour if it is long term. Losing your patience once when sleep derived is completely different to shouting every time a baby cries.

Do not ever leave him alone with the baby, even for a split second. Shouting at an 8 week old baby is a massive red flag. Is he aggressive with you OP?
I'd leave, but if you won't, make sure he is never, never left unsupervised with the wee one. All it takes is one bad decision or loss of control and the consequences could be catastrophic.

It's definitely not a violent situation it's weird because I can let her cry and I don't lose my patience where as he doesn't seem to like babies crying it irritates him oddly ! And he doesn't see his other children because of so many reasons his oldest for example the ex spilt with him after giving birth and he said he doesn't have a bond with her which I'm confused about too !!

I'm not surprised his other children are non contact with him! He sounds awful!

He shouts at an 8 week old and doesn't see his other kids? OP you need to wake up and see what he is.

Maybe now you can see why he has an exw. . .
I would stop leaving the baby with him unsupervised tbh.
Tell him without anger management you won't have him around the baby alone.

Oh no I must of worded this all wrong cause he's not a bad person at all but thanks guys I didn't realise how bad it sounds !

Shouting at an 8 week old and not seeing his other children - so many red flags. This is not normal behaviour and you should be very careful - never leave him alone with the baby.

Would you let a stranger shout at and scare your baby like that? If not, why are you dithering about letting her own father do it?

Are you not a bit concerned that he has 3 other children he doesn't see and he is already losing his temper with your newborn? Presumably you only have his version of why he doesn't see the others, but I'd be trying to get in touch with his ex/exes and doing some kind of background check if possible.

I am finding your chirpy exclamation mark ridden posts deeply offensive. It is no joking matter.

The key to good parenting is to understand the capabilities and feelings of the child at every stage; and if he is unable to think himself inside the mind of a helpless little baby (who only has crying as a means of communicating) then what is he going to be like with a stroppy toddler? This is a dangerous situation.

I can't imagine why the ex split with him right after his eldest was born.... can you?

If he doesn't see his other dc then he isn't really and experienced parent is he? And why shout at an 8 week old to stop crying. The baby's hardly going to understand and stop. Shouting will frighten the baby.

But doesn't anyone lose there temper when they are sleep deprived and working too ? And I'd never let her come into any danger she rarely leaves my side only when I need a shower I'd never put her in any danger but I understand where your all coming from but it's definitely not that kind of situation she's safe without a doubt I just don't like how quick he passes her to me if he can't cope !!

Oh my gosh I'm sorry guys I really didn't expect to get this kind of reaction i understand there's dangerous situations but this isn't one and I realise it's a serious matter and yeah I only have his version on his exs I will look into that Thankyou everyone x

But doesn't anyone lose there temper when they are sleep deprived and working too ?

No.

It is scary for babies to have an adult shouting at them. Your daughter only has you to protect her from this.

I honestly didn't realise this has definitely been an eye opener I'm glad I asked as a new mum I've read all these books and I want to be the best parent I can be and I'll look into his children I would like to no.

Why is he sleep deprived if the baby sleeps through?

He doesn't sleep well generally that's all. I on the other hand sleep like a baby lol

Nope, neither of us ever shouted at either of our 8 week old babies. Toddlers, yes. There's something wrong with him, and you need to think about why you think it's ok he doesn't see his kids, I'd run a mile from a bloke who didn't have contact with his dc - massive red flag unless he's got years of evidence of spending money to get contact and sound reasons why he couldn't get it.

How old are you op? You don't sound as though you have a lot of life experience.

The normal reaction to a crying 8 week old baby is to tend to them and comfort them.
Why would anyone shout at them? They're crying because they need something.

Does he pick her up? Change her nappy? Bath her? Cuddle her?

I'm 25 he's 31 and he has been through contact centres he's in touch with the ex but it's a matter of affording court he does want to see them !

Yeah he helps do all that he doesn't scream at her it's just oh u deal with her kind of thing he does walk out the room when she's screaming I'm the only one who can settle her.