Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

Please or to access all these features

Parenting

For free parenting resources please check out the Early Years Alliance's Family Corner.

Would you let someone take your child on holiday, if they wouldn't tell you where they were taking them?

65 replies

Aimsmum · 04/04/2007 18:04

Message withdrawn

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
2cheekymonkeys · 04/04/2007 22:53

No bl**dy way!!. I'd need a full breakdown of exactly what they were going to do and when, and maybe even a webcam so i could check they were ok. Tell him to provide more details or forget the holiday.

Aloha · 04/04/2007 23:07

No.

mumto3girls · 04/04/2007 23:13

There is no way I would let my chilod go with him.

Interested in this thread?

Then you might like threads about these subjects:

Marina · 04/04/2007 23:14

Goodness Aimsmum, definitely not
What an idiot! You have to put up with such a lot from that man

UCM · 04/04/2007 23:19

At first I thought God NO. But when I read your post correctly I realised what (I assume) they are doing. It's quite reasonable to approach caravan sites on the spot as such, to get a cheaper price if you want a cheap holiday.

So, in response to this, I would suggest that you ask him to look on the web and if he can't then you do it, for the nos. of the people who own these sites.

Do you have his mobile number, and is his partner hostile as far as you are concerned? This is an important factor.

Aimsmum · 06/04/2007 09:35

Message withdrawn

OP posts:
UCM · 06/04/2007 21:23

Oooo Aimsmum, I didn't know that he is usually unreasonable.

I was looking at it from the side of someone driving up to a holiday camp and trying to get some cheap accommodation.

I hope you have a lovely time anyway

edam · 06/04/2007 21:35

What an idiot he is.

edam · 06/04/2007 21:37

(My mother once called the police because my paternal gran was planning to put my sister and I on a train on our own to get back home from her house. We were six and eight, the guards were on strike, and it was a 100 mile journey involving two changes... the police actually came out and my grandmother ended up driving us home.)

fortyplus · 06/04/2007 21:38

Hopefully he will give it a bit more thought next time. Well done you for standing firm

tribpot · 07/04/2007 14:19

This is the guy who once charged you £25 to drop his own child off at school, yes?!

mishw · 07/04/2007 14:29

Good God no way!

If you explain to her first why you are not letting her go then he can;t make you out to be all bad as you will have already explained the situatiopn to her.

Judy1234 · 07/04/2007 14:36

I suspect a lot of mothers do this though so let's not be too sexist about it. I think it depends on the extent of the other parent's involvement. If you know them and trust them it doesn't matter but if they hardly ever see the child and they might be about to make off with it and they're dangerous with children then it's a very different matter.

Aimsmum · 07/04/2007 22:13

Message withdrawn

OP posts:
paros · 07/04/2007 22:31

Do you think he is inTENT on doing that . LOL sorry glad you stuck to not letting her go he sounds really stupid taking his child away with no thought for accomadation .

Aimsmum · 08/04/2007 11:02

Message withdrawn

OP posts:
Surfermum · 08/04/2007 11:19

I can kind of see it from his point of view, but I don't agree with how he's handled it.

We found it really annoying when dsd's mum insisting on having all the details of our holidays. It wasn't so much the wanting details but it was the "you're not taking her anywhere unless I know xyz" stance that she took. The way dh looked at it was that he was dsd's dad and was going to look after dsd every bit as well as dsd's mum, he should just be trusted with her, just like he trusted her to his x every time he handed her back. Also, she knew that dh was contactable on his mobile 24 hours a day.

At the time, however, had to hand dsd back to her mum and would not be able to contact his x for another 3 weeks. She thought that was perfectly reasonable, and when dh asked her what she'd be doing and where she'd be going with dsd for the 3 weeks he wasn't going to see her he was told it was none of his ** business. Double standards. So I hope you can see where our frustrations came from.

We would never have promised dsd a holiday and then not taken her though because her mum was insisting on details. What did we want to achieve at the end of the day? A holiday with dsd, if that meant providing all the information dsd's mum wanted then so what - the double standards thing was annoying, but there was no reason not to give the details. She even got dh to sign a letter when we went to France saying he would return her passport to his x as soon as we returned, got dh to sign it, dsd to sign it, she signed it and she dragged a friend in the sign it too. All we thought was "we can sign it in blood if you want, but we'll do it so we can get our holiday".

paros · 08/04/2007 16:48

Or were you just CANVASING for opinions . LOL OK I will stop now .

Aloveheart · 08/04/2007 17:03

No i wouldn't at all.

SofiaAmes · 08/04/2007 17:15

I think that it's unreasonable to require your dd's father to report to you about how he's planning to spend time with her. It's not unreasonable for you to want to be able to stay in touch with her while she's gone...6 is too young to not have contact regularly with both parents. However, please try to bear in mind that it will do your child good to learn that there is more than one way to approach life and that there are times when you need to be able to cope when things haven't been totally preprogrammed. Now I'm not suggesting throwing her out into the world on her own at 6 to learn life lessons. But she is going to be with her father and a chaotic trip to a camp ground doesn't exactly sound like a hugely risky adventure (it's not like they're heading off to the jungles of africa without pre-planning).
If however, you truly feel that there is a bigger issue here (beyond the irritating male behavior) and he is not a suitable caretaker for his child (because he is violent or abusive), then you should pursue the appropriate channels to prevent him having unsupervised access at all. He is the man you chose to be the father of your child....he must have something right with him.

powder28 · 08/04/2007 17:18

Havnt read thread but from your first post it sounds like he is trying to p*ss you off by being all vague and unhelpful with the details. As long as you dont susepct he is trying to smuggle dd out of the country then just rise above it and let her go.

Aimsmum · 10/04/2007 16:12

Message withdrawn

OP posts:
kslatts · 10/04/2007 16:36

Do you always tell him where you are taking your dd?

I can understand he want's to take his dd away for a few days.

cruisemum1 · 10/04/2007 16:44

haven't even read op or following posts.. NO!

Aimsmum · 10/04/2007 16:53

Message withdrawn

OP posts: