Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

Parenting

For free parenting resources please check out the Early Years Alliance's Family Corner.

Flip

1 2 3

Original poster

Almost 3 and hysterical about changing nappy!

54 replies

Astrongcupoftea · 14/08/2017 07:18

It's getting ridiculous. The battles. He is a placid and pleasant child except this which causes him such distress! He becomes hysterical! He screams and loses his temper and goes nuts and throws the nappies away and says "No nappy! I go away! I put nappy away!"

He is getting very difficult about changing clothes and anything to do with his Willy which he is getting very guarded and defensive about. He only goes in the bath if he can stand up in it wearing his nappy.

He have been as kind as we can but right now he has a poo in his nappy and we're going to have to spend 20 minutes basically begging him to change it!!!!!

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

Igottastartthinkingbee · 14/08/2017 07:20

Maybe time to potty train?

GoingplaceZ · 14/08/2017 07:22

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

WindyScales · 14/08/2017 07:22

I've just potty trained my 2.5 yr old and she is the same with putting her nighttime nappy on. Do you think yours is ready to potty train?

Interested in this thread?

Then you might like threads about these subjects:

Families General parenting Potty training

LittleCandle · 14/08/2017 07:23

Stop begging and just tell him! You are the adult. Perhaps it is time to potty train him since nappies are causing such distress. You don't need to be angry, but just be firm. If he gets away with behaviour like this at 3, what is he going to be like at 13? You also need to get to the bottom of his behaviour. Is he in pain? Have a word with your HV about this. They might have suggestions to help. Does he have special needs? This does need to be investigated, but in the meantime, you need to be firm but kind to deal with this.

OrphanAccount · 14/08/2017 07:23

He's almost 3 and telling you he no longer wants nappies. Time to give potty training a go I think.

Original poster

Astrongcupoftea · 14/08/2017 07:33

But that's the thing,we want to train him but he's having none of it!

It's only this weekend we actually persuaded him to even sit on the toilet (on the toddler insert). He sat on it three times which is miraculous. But he would be very resistant to being on it bare arsed.

OP posts:

WindyScales · 14/08/2017 07:46

Have you let him pick out his own potty and made a big fuss about it. My DD wouldn't sit on a toilet when I first potty trained her, I think she was intimidated by it. But now (about 2 months later) she's not really interested in the potty and wants to sit on the toilet. She's progressing in stages. Your son sat on the loo 3 times in 1 day/weekend, if he's never done that before that is progress. Maybe you need to think of taking it in smaller stages?

OrphanAccount · 14/08/2017 07:51

Could you let him choose him own potty and pants? It's quite common for toddlers to not like the toilet.

WindyScales · 14/08/2017 07:54

Yes (I forgot about the pants), let him chose those too! Something with his favourite character on it or if he likes bright colours. Make it fun.

Bribery to use the potty/wee in pants is also effective. We've been using chocolate buttons, then as time goes on chocolate buttons just for poos and then just phase it out.

Original poster

Astrongcupoftea · 14/08/2017 08:04

We finally changed his nappy this morning by bribing him with a biscuit which he promptly forgot about so he got porridge afterwards instead.

So I told DH about this thread and he invited DS into the toilet and showed him himself doing a poo (we've been doing that for weeks) and then after they flushed he asked DS if he'd like to do a poo and he allowed DH to take down his trousers and nappy! Apparently he even strained and said "No...it's all gone"

We are so proud!

But what's the next move? He is going to nursery today and they have regular nappies. Do we start with training pants instead of nappies?

OP posts:

ImDoingLaundry · 14/08/2017 08:39

Take some training pants to nursery, tell them you're starting potty training and what he's done at home so far. They should be supportive.

It really sounds like he's ready to be without nappies, but not sure what to do. Does he understand the concept of sticker reward charts yet?

Original poster

Astrongcupoftea · 14/08/2017 08:43

No we've never used them. But tbh we've acted like it's the greatest thing in the history of the world and he's so happy right now he's hyper!

OP posts:

ImDoingLaundry · 14/08/2017 09:05

Cute let us know how it goes!

liquidrevolution · 14/08/2017 09:11

And remember pull ups for night time and they are special night pants NOT nappies.

DD just decided to wear pants one morning before nursery. She was dry all day and hasnt worn nappies since.

Original poster

Astrongcupoftea · 14/08/2017 09:26

Thanks! Fingers crossed!

OP posts:

Cutesbabasmummy · 14/08/2017 10:10

Definitely ready for potty training. No more nappies! My advice is whatever you do don't go back to nappies or they get confused xx

waterrat · 14/08/2017 19:38

At his age dont wear training pants he can just learn to go ! The nursery will have to help potty train him and they should accept that involves accidents.

Original poster

Astrongcupoftea · 16/08/2017 17:29

Ok guys update is that we're not progressing. He's refused to sit in the toilet since. We've switched to training pants but he still refuses to let us change his nappy.

We're doing everything we can to transition him, including telling him stories whilst he's sitting on it. But he really won't sit on it. He won't even sit on my lap when I'm having a wee! But he's happy to observe and tell me to wash my hands!

He told me he's frightened of the toilet. He doesn't like it.

Nursery is on board but tell us he rarely will sit on the toilet there. He will go in with the others and observe them. Just doesn't want to do it himself.

So we're in limbo!

The only way we can change his nappy is by standing him at the sink on a chair and letting him splash in water. Then he's so distracted we can do it.

So I would be perfectly happy to forget the toilet if only we could change his nappy without a screaming match or him getting soaked at the sink!

OP posts:

AreWeThereYet000 · 16/08/2017 17:33

Forget the toilet just use a potty. My boy wouldn't go on the toilet it scared him but was happy to go to the potty. One upstairs and one downstairs, before you eat tea - let's try the potty, mummy's going for a wee on the toilet, you try the potty etc.

My boy (3) has no issues with using the loo now

Igottastartthinkingbee · 16/08/2017 19:30

Don't force it. Use the potty if he's happy with that.

ImDoingLaundry · 16/08/2017 20:55

Would he just wear normal underwear? Keep getting him used to the toilet by taking him with you etc.

Our boy was late toilet training, 3 years 9 months. He just wasn't ready before. What helped was taking him to the toilet with us, letting him watch, lots of books about pooing, YouTube videos about pooing, giving up pull up pants apart from bedtime, and a "special toilet seat" with a bar so his feet didn't dangle down. It was only £12 and seemed to help him feel more secure.

Almost 3 and hysterical about changing nappy!

iamapixiebutnotaniceone · 17/08/2017 23:25

My eldest had a very similar phase, she wouldn't go near a normal potty and was scared of the big toilet. We got her one of those toilet shaped pottys with the 'flusher' that makes a cheering noise. She chose the Minnie Mouse one, she took to it instantly!

DameDiazepamTheDramaQueen · 17/08/2017 23:30

Put him in pants and leave him to it,no fuss, attention or begging him to cooperate. Lots of praise when he manages it and just quickly change him when he doesn't with minimum fuss.

Cutesbabasmummy · 18/08/2017 13:27

Take the power back. He can do a wee and poo in the potty. He's nearly three. The reason he is guarded about his Willy is because he is starting to realise it's a private thing. Take off the nappies and have him bare bottomed. When you see him weeing put him on the potty and tell him that is where he does his wees aND poos. No nappies apart from a pull up at night. Then once he is doing wees on the potty you can move to trousers and no pants. We have done this for a month and today is the first day of pants and trousers. My son was like yours- hated nappy changes and it was like a wrestling match.

Original poster

Astrongcupoftea · 22/08/2017 09:11

So things are worse than ever. This morning he got dressed placidly enough as he just had a wet nappy getting up, but an hour later we noticed he had done such a poo it was coming out the top of the nappy.

He literally would not let us touch him. We tried all the usual enticements, but when a bit of poo actually fell out of his trouser leg and plopped on the bathroom floor, DH stood him up on the toilet seat and basically forced him. He was having a complete meltdown throughout, hysterical. We also had to take off his top as poo got on the hem.

Then after he wouldn't out on any new clothes cos "there's poo on it" and we had another half an hour of trying to get new clothes on.

Oh and the latest thing is that we're not allowed to look at his Willy. And the only way we can change his nappy since is if we solemnly swear not to look at his Willy.

This is a situation where we would be only delighted to not toilet train the child and leave it for another 6 months.......but he is putting us in limbo where he doesn't want either nappies or toilet.

He still won't sit on the toilet. In nursery he doesn't sound keen either, though he does the odd time, briefly.

And to top it all nursery have recommended we not use a potty as none of the other children use a potty!

(And tbh he is developing such a hard nut that I suspect he would rebel against the potty too)

He is in nursery 5 days a week so we can't just leave off thr nappy and ask them to clean shitty underpants, you know? We need their cooperation.

Besides, if he is that distressed about poo escaping from a nappy he would have a nervous breakdown over poo in underpants.

It's just so distressing.

OP posts:

Flip

1 2 3