Someone PLEASE help me!!!!

[flamey]

I don't know what to do with her anymore.

I gave her warning - I told her she could have one computer session a day, we made little cards so she could choose the computer card, put it in a box ready for the next day.

She had a timer to tell her when the session was up.

She knew at the start of the session that after the timer she would be having a bath.

She screamed. Kept turning the computer back on.

She lost all her pasta (kept counting to 3 and taking another piece). She still kept screaming no at me.

I gave the jar to DS (she is convinced he will break it) - said she could have it back when she got in the bath... still screamed no at me.

Threw her teddy out the front door.

Confiscated her care bear.

Threatened to confiscate giant Boo which eventually got her into the bath.

Somewhere in amongst that lot I lost my temper and smacked her leg (I very very rarely smack).

I screamed and shouted - I was never going to be screaming shouting mummy.

My throat hurts. I can't do this anymore.

I don't want to be around her because I can see how much I have failed her.

She would be better off without me.

I'm not being critical, I promise.
Can you give her a reason to finish on the computer or to go in the bath? DS would watch TV all day if I didn't provide an alternative, just telling him to put TV off would not do the trick. He can be tempted into the bath with a water pistol / squeezy bottle, story, game etc (gets bored quickly so have to keep thinking of new suggestions), he would also meltdown if I just tried to make him.
Also removing things (toys etc) can just make them more angrey as they don't understand why, just think you're getting at them. As a child I was always being sent to my room and not really knowing why. Just concluded that no one liked me.

Right - both out the bath.

We've had a chat and a cuddle and she seems to have calmed down a bit.

Believe me M2K - I have tried the various options offering route etc. The bath was agreed on before the computer session - it was coloured with bubbles and toys.

The visual day plan could help a lot - I did something like that before we went on holiday so it didn't freak her out too much.

She has just come in and asked what card we're doing now... that sounds promising?

you are human, you shouted, you sound like a damn fine mummy to me

Thank you FB Things are a lot calmer here now... they are playing nicely together