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Parenting

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Original poster

Are child reins a big faux pas?

142 replies

MerryMarigold · 26/01/2007 14:51

My friend's child is constantly running off and I always declared mine (who is now just walking) will be on reins as soon as he's running. But I never seem to see people using them. Why not?

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twelveyeargap · 26/01/2007 15:07

I used a wristlink when out in busy places. I thought that was a bit less like a "lead". I saw a woman in an airport with 4 children linked to her wrists with them. I thought it was a great idea. Airports are stressful enough, but I'm sure it's unbearable when travelling with 4 kids and no other adult support.

IntergalacticWalrus · 26/01/2007 15:07

I think it's down to the individual child tbh. DS1 isn;t particularly compliant kid so I use them with him because he goes taeringh towards the road at top speed, and as I usually have DS2 withy me, who is 4 months, I'd rather not take the risk. The way I look at it is that I'd rather people think I am crass than have my precious babies run over.

If DS2 is a little calmer then DS1, I probably won;t use them tbh. I only use them with DS1 when we are somewhere busy or unknown

Skyler · 26/01/2007 15:08

NP - I know. Sound dreadful doesn't it, but my dd's and roads terrify me. I just culdn't trust them. DD1 is excellent walking with me most of the time now. DD2 won't be for a long time and she is stubborn too. Mine always had the reins and used to bring them to me to say they wanted to go out lol. They were more than happy to put them on at the ages I really wanted them to wear them.
The reins very rarely got used when dd1 was older as the threat was enough to get her to comply .
I am still jealous when I see Mums with a child in a pushchair and a toddler obediently holding on.

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Original poster

MerryMarigold · 26/01/2007 15:09

anyway, i was thinking of the ones fastened by harness rather than on wrist, slightly less doglead-ish i think and arms free to do whatever even if legs are not.

OP posts:

littleducks · 26/01/2007 15:10

my dh cant wait for dd (8 months) to be big enough to use them, he mentioned it this morning maybe he is a lurker on mn

Skyler · 26/01/2007 15:11

Oh I don't like the wrist straps actually. What a hypocrite

IntergalacticWalrus · 26/01/2007 15:11

I will add that before I had DS1, I was definitely not going to use reins. A bit like I was definitely not going to use a dummy (his non stop screaming put paid to that one) and I was'nt going to let them watch too much tv (yeah right)

Original poster

MerryMarigold · 26/01/2007 15:11

yes, i had really cool ones when a kid, and still remember them quite fondly, a big lion face on the front! maybe your dh did too, littleducks, and so can't wait

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Original poster

MerryMarigold · 26/01/2007 15:13

can't reins be cool in a retro kind of way? that's what i was thinking...

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Imafairy · 26/01/2007 15:14

Don't pay any attention to anyone else - do what you want to do.
My DS1 (3) ran off on me the other day. I had to abandon DS2 in his buggy to go after him. Wrist strap has been re-instated. I would prefer to get bad looks from people that have ANYTHING happen my DCs

Blu · 26/01/2007 15:17

I think they are an obvious and practical answer to keeping a young toddler safe when you are out and about, need to have a hand partially available to do other things (which you can't when leaning silightly sideways to be able to rach a small hand), and can't for the life of me see why people object to them.

Kittypickle · 26/01/2007 15:18

I think after you've grabbed an absconding toddler from the path a couple of times you get to the point where you really don't give a monkeys what they look like. I used them for a couple of months with DS until he got the hang of the not getting squashed under cars thing. DD was completely different and I didn't ever contemplate them for her.

nailpolish · 26/01/2007 15:21

twig - like a choke chain? LOL

marigold - yes i think you are right - i often observe wriggly and runny boys

mamama · 26/01/2007 15:21

Agree with Becky - better safe than sorry.

I used them when DS was just beginning to walk - he was really unsteady and would fall all the time but was quite insistent on walking everywhere & absolutely refused to hold my hand. With the reins, at least I could hold them so when he did fall, he wouldn't hit his face on the ground.

He also had a nasty tendency to make a sudden dash for the road. I'm in the US and have never seen anyone use them here but we got lots of compliments on them as well as a few dog lead comments but most of those were in a 'cute', affectionate way. And, tbh, DS is a bit like a naughty puppy anyway...

Jimjams2 · 26/01/2007 15:29

I have a large belt plus reins for ds1 (aged 7) essential if I have to go out by myself with him and his brothers or we have to go and say buy a pint of milk (involves waiting).

Loads of people stare, couldn't care less. They shouldn't be so rude.

IntergalacticWalrus · 26/01/2007 15:32

Amen to that JJ.

Blu · 26/01/2007 15:32

I actually think they look quite cute, and don't know what there is to stare AT..never mind the question about who should care about the opinion of anyone so rude as to stare! Reins are a common enough piece of kit, available from mainstream children's shops...so what's the big deal?

They are not cruel, uncomnfortable, dangerous, habit-forming, contributing to global warming or full of hydrogenated fats, so what's not to like?

IntergalacticWalrus · 26/01/2007 15:34

Nobody has ever said anything to me about DS!'s reins, but if they do, I'll just ask tme if they'd like to keep him undef control for a while by a busy road. That'll shut 'em up.

Anyway, DS likes his reins. He asks for them to be put on.

Original poster

MerryMarigold · 26/01/2007 15:35

spot on, blue. really can't see why more people don't use them...

OP posts:

hatwoman · 26/01/2007 15:37

I used them for a bit. especially if you've got more than one kid - stopping them from running into the road comes way higher than giving a hoot what other people think.

Lact8 · 26/01/2007 15:45

DS1 and DS2 would never wear the reins. They woudl just make themselves go all floppy and dangle from them.

DD, however loves hers. She's 13 mths old and I've discovered the only way to get her to sleep all night is to take her for a walk every dy.

So she is wearing ones that I was given, pink ones from mothercare with princess written on the front of them (most def a faux pas and I deserve all the stares I get ) But they do mean she doesn't fall over as much and I can keep a firm grip on DS2 at the same time.

Carmenere · 26/01/2007 15:47

I used them, running toddlers and roads terrify me. In the village I grew up in in Ireland a 2 yr old ran out under a car and was killed I don't care what it looks like.

TheBlonde · 26/01/2007 15:55

I use them. Mostly for on the tube when I need to keep a grip on the toddler with one hand and fold the buggy with the other

I make him hold my hand but I also have the reins as back up should he make a break for it

3andnomore · 26/01/2007 16:03

I think it depends on the toddler and the area where they are likely to walk..
with ds2 I had to have reigns/harrness thing (had one of those Lindam backpack things, brilliant)
ds 3 is completely different so, we don't need any of that, even though he has started walking out and about at a much younger age....

Songbird · 26/01/2007 16:09

Try this . I didn't like the dog-lead connotations of traditional reins and the wrist strap gave me nightmarish visions of dislocated shoulders, and this makes dd (22 months) feel much more grown up. So many people have commented on what a good idea it is. You can detach the strap as well so it's just a small back-pack. Dd looks soooo cute wearing this and she loves it.

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