People touch my baby's face - rant

[qi]

I am always angry about this.

Today at M&S shop there was a woman (who works there) came from no where and start to touch DS's face.

I treat my DS as a little person not a toy, I'd expect others do the same. Besides, how do I know a random person's hand is clean or this person does not have disease?

I think it should be an offence to touch baby's face without asking the parent first.

So if some old lady bends down with her hand outstretched towards your baby what do you do? Do you speicify where she can touch and cant and watch her to make sure she follows your instructions?

I agree with the twiglet pov. qi you seem to have a particular issue with faces/hair which I don't understand. And what is nicer to touch than baby hair? So soft and downy and lovely.

I totally agree with twig. Besides, a little bit of dirt is good for their immune systems. Your ds was not being touched inappropriately, a stranger was just being kind enough to admire him and express affection. Be proud, and chill.

I used to think it was lovely when people made a fuss of my babies.
I think it is one of the last vestiges of a sense of community - that in a small way babies belong a little bit to everyone, and are to be cherished.
Fifty years ago everyone where my grandparents lived would put their babies in their prams outside their houses, and kept and eye on each other's children. Passers-by would stop to have a chat, and fuss over the babies.
Cue some of the posters on this thread fainting clean away from an attack of the vapours!
Unless we keep our children in hermetically sealed bubbles, they are going to come into contact with other people.
I wouldn't be pleased if a stranger put their fingers in the mouth of my baby, as it seems a rather strange and invasive thing to do, but a stroke on the face is really no big deal, IMO.
Babies need to build up an immunity to germs. The average M&S employee is hardly likely to be riddled with scabies and carrying rabies, but I may be wrong.
Re: "I think it should be an offence to touch baby's face without asking the parent first".
There are far worse things that can happen to a child than to be gently stroked on the face by a caring stranger.

well put humphreys cushion

Jeez. Next someone will be complaining when the next door neighbours dog comes and licks your baby all over. It's good for them!!

agree with humphrey cushion.

A stroke on the face is fine by me. Not if baby is asleep though, and definitely no finger in mouth.

Yer dont let peple tuch ur babas they mite be PEEEEEDOOS

Good point Colditz. I hadn't thought of that. Must be more vigilant.

When someone makes a fuss of my dd I love it. It makes me feel so proud.

I used to love it even more when complete strangers used to put money into her little hands .

DD loves all the attention too.

If I had a worrry about my child I think I would have carried her in a papoose or covered over pram or something so she was inaccessible. Tbh, if your child is in such danger from picking up germs maybe they should be kept indoors?!

rofl

rofl

I'm with Can'tWait...i feel proud when people comment on how gorgeous my son is, and stroke his head or brush his cheek. Obviously there's a limit, but there's something lovely about strangers aknowledging the loveliness of babies. It's nice to see otherwise miserable bus passengers smile and coo on sight.

With my first I was paranoid when ever anybody touched her face because if anyone was wearing perfume she would break out in red spots. Howver by the time ds came I was very chilled and passed over to people as soon as I could.

People talk about bugs that are very harmless, but what about bugs that we don't know? Nobody heard about SARS before the outbreak in HK. The bugs were transmitted by a sick person pressing a lift button.
200 people died in 2 months.

Avian Flu? The government is trying to educate the people to be prepared for the flu season. There have been talks of supplying antiseptic wipes on public transport because it's a confined space and very easy for germs to spread.

I think that is what worries me. It's alright saying that there hasn't been a case in the UK, but people do travel. Believe me I am no clean freak. My home is anything but clean.

You ARE a first time mum.

Well, this is my second baby and I don't want strangers touching him. FWIW, ds2 was a preemie and as we are in the cold/flu season I think it is reasonable to not want him touched. When we are out he is usually in a sling or a wrap and so people don't tend to touch as much. You can move ever so slightly when they start leaning towards you and it prevents most touching. If you keep smiling they don't tend to realize that you moved on purpose. It still happens occasionally though.

As far as the post about someone sticking their finger in a baby's mouth, this happened with ds1 and maybe helped to increase my paranoia. Once they reach their hand out is it going on the head, in the mouth, or what?

I know "It Takes a Village" to raise a child, but it takes a parent to keep them healthy

Blimey, it's no surprise, really, that we're so baby and child unfriendly in this country, if people freak when someone touches their child. I don't think it's acceptable for a stranger to stick their fingers into a baby's mouth, and I know that we're all naturally protective about newborns but if an old lady wanted to stroke the face of my 7 month old because she thought he or she was gorgeous and because she remembered what it was like to have a child, and perhaps because she missed her grandchildren, bloody fantastic.

Some friends of mine have Italian relatives and whenever they visit, and I'm there with my kids, the Italians swoop on the children and carry them away, kissing them and exclaiming about how beautiful they are, and laughing - it's wonderful, and joyous, and makes my children feel adored. And that's a sentiment that is almost entirely lacking in this country.

Try to chill out a little, qi, your baby is more robust than you think!

PMSL at this thread. Those of you who are worried should buy those buggies that come with a bubble over them (they were designed to keep out pollution- they were around when ds1 was a baby, but I haven't seen them since so assum,e they didn't catch on- they came with filters etc).

I remember BIL holding his PFB and my cleaner reached over and stroked his cheek (she loves kids- loked after ds3 for me for one day a week for 4 months whilst he was a baby). BIL pulled PFB away- it was really obvious. I was embarrassed for my cleaner.

Agree I think you need to realise you are freakily odd about his and everyone else is normal.

DD3, my most bug-free child was practically raised in an hospital. which actually has more potent bugs than in the outside world. She has just got her first bad tummy bug illness at 22months. and she hasnt stepped foot inside the hospital in 6months. I wasnt worried about people handling her, heck she licked the floors and chewed the doorframes there. She visited my dh when he had a nasty hospital bug. She has had her face stroked by anyone and everyone, she put her little cubby fingers in their mouths and then in her own mouth. She has played in the field next to horses there, has eaten in communal areas, dropped stuff on the hospital room floor and ate it before i could stop her.

TBH a little face stroking is the least of your worries. soon your baby will be on the move and chewing your shoes.

Ha d aquick google- can't find the buggy I'm thinking of but apparently phil and teds do some sort of pollution cover. Peple will wonder why you've got a raincover on when its not raining, but they won't be able to touch your baby (mind you my babies would have gone ballistic- none of them liked raincovers).

and the cleaners and porters loved stroking her face and coo-ing at her.