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Original poster

FATHER OF CHILD'S FRIEND IS DIVORCED

34 replies

oliandmimismummy · 03/02/2016 15:07

My 11 yr old DD is friends with a boy in her class. They've recently started playing at either our house or his, no problem there whatsoever. Anyway, he lives with his divorced father who has now suggested that we go out to the cinema one day. He knows that I am married and I don't think DH would be too keen on me going out with another bloke. What do I do?

OP posts:
usual · 03/02/2016 15:10

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Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Seeline · 03/02/2016 15:10

Did he mean with the kids?

FrozenPonds · 03/02/2016 15:12

Is he wanting to take the children to the cinema together?

Sounds fine.

Even without the children, it sounds fine if he seems the kind of guy you could become friends with.

If you don't want to though, just say no. It's not hard.

Interested in this thread?

Then you might like threads about these subjects:

11 year olds Families General parenting
Original poster
oliandmimismummy · 03/02/2016 15:14

Yes, with the kids. Just don't want him getting the wrong idea.

OP posts:
usual · 03/02/2016 15:15

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Scoopmuckdizzy · 03/02/2016 15:17

Surely that's no different to going out to the cinema with a divorced mother? I don't see a problem with it.

gamerchick · 03/02/2016 15:17

Do men fall at your feet usually? Maybe your husband can go instead if it's such a huge issue? he might just want some adult company.

Keeptrudging · 03/02/2016 15:18

No, seems awkward/odd. I don't go to the cinema with the parents of my DD's newish friends (male or female) because I don't know them well enough. At 11, it's a quick chat at drop off/pick up, that's it!

NaughtToThreeSadOnions · 03/02/2016 15:18

Right ok erm what is the problem?

Is it we should take our kids to the cinema together you him and probably even your husband? Then even if your husband isn't there then not quite sure what your worrying about not sure how much hanky panky you can get up to with two 11 year olds between you. And just cos he's asked you doesn't mean he fancies you.

Has he asked you just you and him? Then yes that is a problem. You need to reinforce your married but then again would you go out with another mum from school because it could just be a social thing not a date.

What concerns me slightly is your prediction that your husband won't like it. Has he got female friends? Is there a reason he wouldn't trust you?! Is it because the other man is divorced?

Not all divorced men want to jump in to the pants of the next woman they meet. Tbh I think the problem is your husband

I'm travelling through a dodgy reception so I'm very likely to have cross posted

omri · 03/02/2016 15:19

I'd go - same as I'd go with the friend's mother. Nice to get to know the parents of your kids' friends.

I wouldn't read too much into it unless you have a reason to...

Original poster
oliandmimismummy · 03/02/2016 15:20

I guess it must be quite difficult for him being divorced. Forgot to say, we live in Spain and school runs, childcare etc. tend to fall on the mum so it might get quite complicated for him trying to befriend the other mums.

OP posts:
willconcern · 03/02/2016 15:20

On your own with him, no.

With the kids, why not? Unless you fancy him if course.

RiverTam · 03/02/2016 15:21

Your DH wouldn't like you going on a trip to the cinema with 2 children and a parent? Have I missed something? Because what on earth is his problem with this? What a peach to trust his wife so much Hmm.

MuddhaOfSuburbia · 03/02/2016 15:21

dyou know, I wouldn't fancy this much

with 11yo dcs? wouldn't they like to go on their own?

it's weird (I mean I am, not Divorced Dad) -I'd happily go to a playground with littlies and a MAN, but not with biggies to the flicks

PurpleDaisies · 03/02/2016 15:22

Presumably he knows you're married. Going to the cinema (where you can't talk) with your children really doesn't sound like he's about to it the moves on you. You can say no if you want but I think you're over thinking this.

RudeElf · 03/02/2016 15:23

So your DH can go.

MuddhaOfSuburbia · 03/02/2016 15:24

ime only one adult goes to the pictures with 11yos

that's the adult with the short straw

any other adults go to the shops or costa or wetherspoons for the duration

NotJanine · 03/02/2016 15:29

If I was going to ask a parent if we should take our kids to the cinema I would ask the mum not the dad. So I do think his suggestion is odd.

NaughtToThreeSadOnions · 03/02/2016 16:08

love to be the first half of the year of high quality of life and the rest of the year of high quality of life and the rest of the day before I get a follow back on my way home and I don't think that I have a great way of the day before I get a follow back on my way home and I don't think that I have a great way of the year and I don't think

usual · 03/02/2016 16:09

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

NellysKnickers · 03/02/2016 16:12

With the kids, yes fine. Is he lonely? Maybe he just wants a friend. Men and women can be friends with no sex y'know. Or invite him to do something with you, dh and kids.

Canyouforgiveher · 03/02/2016 16:14

It's just an invitation to go with kids to the cinema - did that all the time with parents of the children, or to the park or wherever. It doesn't mean you have to become best friends with him.

Although isn't that how you make social connections with other parents? your kids hang out and then one day you suggest going to the cinema with them and you chat a bit on the way in with the kids so now you know each other a bit better etc.

I can't get my head around your dh not liking it. Does he think this guy is asking you out? Do you?

Waltermittythesequel · 03/02/2016 16:17

Man wants to go to cinema with fellow parent and their children.

Alert the church elders!

NaughtToThreeSadOnions · 03/02/2016 16:23

Ahh that's where my what does your phone want to say post went genuinely is the wrong thread plus I posted too soon anyway. 😝

sorry useal for confusing you.

Guitargirl · 03/02/2016 16:30

You said in your OP that your DH wouldn't be happy about you 'going out' with another man.

Does that mean that YOU see this as a date? Even though your children will be there? Confused

And am not sure what being in Spain has to do with anything. You are way overthinking this.