dealing with other people's reactions about having an only child

[debido]

I'm quite new - and this is my first post. Its about only children. I have an only DS - just 4. It's not through choice really but I am coming to terms with it just about and in myself feel content with DS, feel stretched enough with him and DS is happy.

Finding it really hard dealing with other people's reactions to him being an only. Each time it gets to me that bit more and I feel so guilty and makes me feel that every 'bad' thing he does is due to him being an only. ie a friend came with her daughter aged 3 and baby son 5 months and ds was stand-offish at first, my friend kept on about DS being an only. Yet her DD didnt seem that interested in playing with DS in any case.

Another friend goes on about isnt it lonely for DS at christmas being the only child.

DH and I spend loads of time with DS, yet even there, this same friend commented that it's not good for DS. We do try really hard to get him to see his friends too, but obviously he spends more time with us as a family.

Dont know what I mean to say really except I dont know how to deal with other people's reactions to ds being an only child. Especially when we dont know anyone else with an only child.

Thanks for reading this far.

your comments are lovely.

I think it is due a lot to my feelings that I feel I have 'failed' by not having more children and so feel very vulnerable with others comments. Think I need to work on dealing with my own feelings a bit more on this issue, so I can get to be as content as most of you are with having one child.

thank you

I have one dd, not out of choice. She is very unspoilt. She is also very sociable and shares well. However, I have resigned myself to the fact that there will always be people out there who judge her and me. Any negative behaviour will be attributed to her being an only child. I have seen so may children with siblings who are spoiled, clingy, and a whole host of other things, but because they have siblings, people don't say anything. I have come across mums who act all superior to me and act like just because they have one(or more) extra child to me, that makes them superior(and very smug) in some way. It is hard to deal with, I don't care so much for me, but why should my dd be judged this way? I do hope I can have more children, but even if I can't I hope my dd will be confident in our love to rise above all these petty comments and behaviour.