Neighbour neglectful? Or overreacting?

[Anon19]

Over reacting?

So today I came home with kids and they wanted to play in the garden & next doors pram was in the garden, I was in the garden for about 2 hours playing with my son and his cousins then next door comes out & lifts her 7 month old baby out of the pram just wearing pjamas, and a really thin blanket I know it's thin coz we have the same one. Bassicly the baby had been napping in her pram in the garden for at least 2 hours in the freezing cold (all our kids had snowsuits on with boots hats gloves and loads of layers!!) with their back door shut she never came out to check on her once!! I can't believe it I really can't am I over reacting here? Should I say anything to her im fuming the babys tiny I was freezing never mind her :-/ I don't know her well by the way it's a new estate and everyone just moved in a few weeks ago so I've never spoken to her.

enjoying being nasty and ignorant is how i read your post .

My girls have always slept sounder when the room is very cool or napping while walking in winter. It's noticeable how much sounder they sleep. But my friend who feels the cold absolutely doesn't believe this. She can't understand that you can be comfortable when cool and was always trying to wrap up my babies further and politely suggesting they wear snow suits etc.

I smiled and nodded but knew my kids best.

DS1 spent most afternoons as a baby outside napping - and we didn't go out and check on him much as we could see him easily through the window.

Don't see the problem really - the baby would have cried if it was cold wouldn't it?

Loads of people leave their babies to sleep outside. Provided they are adequately clothed, watched over and secure, it's absolutely fine. DD loves sleeping in the pushchair, and sometimes stays asleep, once home, in our back garden. The white noise of the wind in the trees soothes her. Pretty idyllic, really.

You sound rather fussy and a bit silly to be honest. There is nothing inherently dangerous about 'outside'. And waking a baby rather than providing it with the right environment to stay happily asleep is madness.

Jeeeeeze. I leave my baby out in the garden in his pram to sleep. He sleeps better. I did it with his sister too who is grown up. It was very common.

I leave mine in the front garden. I can see him and hear him from my living room. He is safe and secure and getting fresh air galore.

OP you sound utterly hysterical! Both if my babies napped outside, and no I didn't go out the back door to check on them as I can see them just fine from the window

As a previous poster said, in Sweden and other Scandinavian counties is is customary for babies to sleep outside, even in deep snow! They wouldn't dream of taking a sleeping baby inside a cafe, tje prams are just lined up outside.

Get a grip and stop being such a nosey busybody!

If only babies were fitted with a feedback system to let us know they are uncomfortably cold. That would be amazing wouldn't it? Even better if they were able to alert us via some incredibly annoying noise so that their carer dealt with their discomfort quickly.

Is that baby still outside?

I have three kids and they have always napped in the garden, well wrapped up if it was cold, from when they were tiny. They slept much better than in the house. Fresh air is healthy! Amazed at the pearl clutching. Wtf do you think is going to happen to them in an enclosed back garden? Alien attack? I'm sorry but I agree with the poster upthread - I judge anybody objecting to be on the dim side, because there are no rational reasons for babies and toddlers not to sleep outside.

Checked today with 96yr old relative. She said in the 40's and 50's in south London everyone would leave the babies sleeping 'all day' in the front gardens in their prams. It would have been considered very unhealthy not to do it...... They did also leave babies outside shops if the shop was crowded though. Amazing to think that was fine back then!

Everyone used to leave babies to nap outside. It was supposed to be good for them. I would think a 7 month old would cry if uncomfortable.

When I was a kid all naps happened under a tree in the garden. Totally normal stuff. In Nordic countries naps are outside too. All year. It is healthy.

As to coverings perhaps not enough in this case but yabu to object to outside naps.

I think she should have checked on him in the 2 hours but the sleeping outside bit is ok.
My dd always hated being wrapped up and even now I have to fight to get a coat on her in winter.
The big risk to babies is overheating not cold. I always get anxious when I see babies bundled up in the heat. I do understand why you were concerned because you obviously worry about your DC being cold and
It's good that your observant about possible neglect but in this case I think you're over reacting.

If it was that cold, she shouldn't have been sleeping outside full stop. Isn't the rule that you should put them in one more layer than you're wearing? From the OP, that would need to be 4 layers, one of which would need to be thick.

If that were the case bathsheba my ds would have overheated many times. He's a much warmer bod than me, like his dad. Rules are fine sometimes, but when it comes to babies a certain amount of flexibility and common sense is necessary.

For Fuck Sake, is this what we are reduced to? Keeping out a watchful eye on one-another's children to make sure that each one us is fulfilling their optimal parenting expectations based on our individual preferences and crying neglect when parents fall short?

If the baby had been crying because it was cold and those needs we're being ignored - that would be neglectful and worthy of concern.

All this silliness makes people, mothers in particular, feel as though they parent under a microscope with accusations of neglect only a heartbeat away.

The effect is two-fold, parenting in general becomes an increasing anxious activity and disempowers parents and simultaneously creates so much noise around actual neglect it is harder for those who can help to identify and tackle.

It's bullshit to see this shit perpetuated on a parenting site.

I agree kondos

Bathsheba, amazing that Scandinavians haven't died out entirely by now then, as they leave babies to sleep outside when it's minus 10 and snowing! And what is this nonsense about layers? How many you need depends on what the layers are and what the conditions are! When official advice from baby sleeping bag manufacturers overrides common sense, we are all in trouble.

how many you need depends on what the layers are and what the conditions are! When advice from sleeping bag manufacturers overrides common sense, we are all in trouble

This!!