What do you miss most about your life BC (Before Children) ?

[mollipops]

I was thinking about this the other day, and wondered how other mums felt about it... Of course, none of us would give up our children for the world or ever truly regret becoming a mum. But it does change our lives so dramatically, what do you really miss the most???

My list:

• Going to the toilet by myself (with the door open or shut as I pleased!)
• Being able to make a phone call or have a shower without interruption!
• The spontaneous Saturday visits to the shops with dh for no reason, just to "look around", maybe grab a cuppa and some lunch...or any spur-of-the-moment outing, without having to pack drinks, snacks, nappies, dolly etc...
• Having a cute(r) belly button!
• Having a career and my own guilt-free spending money!
• Talking to my dh about things other than bills, money and the kids.

Sounds pretty pathetic (and selfish!) now that I look at it - if I wrote a list of what I would miss now if I wasn't a mum (knowing what I know now), it would definitely be longer! And I do feel better now I realise that!

Anyone else have any others to add?

Sleeping late - how could I have forgotten that!!!

Thanx for all your replies everyone, great reading! (Rhubarb you do make me laugh!)

And going to the movies/theatre/dinner without having to think about babysitters!

My waist

Staying in bed to eat, watch telly and chill out. Oh and ciggies!!

I miss most of the below but one thing I do miss is being able to do without fear of upsetting my gorgeous son is a good old fashioned barny!!!

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A digestive system designed by the Swiss rather than run by Railtrack et al.

Not being on such intimate terms with my washing machine.

Considering getting a babysitter for the day after as well as the actual evening of a Big Night Out.

Yes, for me too the lie-in. Also, again, just being able to do something without worrying about the concequences or undertaking militray-like planning.
We took or 2 ds's to a museum last w/e and there was a train ds (nealy 3) begged to go on it. I checked & was told the ride was only 5 minutes, so off we went. On arrival we were handed, to our surprise, hard hats, and were told we'd be given a tour of a mine. Obviously the hard hat didn't fit a 1 year old too well!, and they were getting really tired and grumpy. We were then told the tour would last 1 hour, and the train would take us back in 1.5 hours! Much 'woman in distress' (genuine!) act to get the driver to take us back immediately. BC it would've been boring but inconsequential. PC (post kids) a traumatic near miss!

Having a nice (fairly) co-ordinated house - now everywhere I look there are multicoloured Duplo bricks, cars, etc.

Watching something other than Fun Song Factory at the moment!

I think the cat misses being numero uno, she is now reduced to a third class citizen!

... But I wouldn't have it any other way!

I miss being able to look forward to the weekend for some well earned rest from work! I can look forward to the weekend, but the well earned rest just doesn't seem to come.

I miss being able to indulge myself when sick (like my DH still does - oh what babies, men are !) rather than having to keep going when I feel like S--t !!

I miss being able to just put my coat on and go. I miss peace and quiet. Most of all i miss being pregnant and feeling little kicks.My daughter is now 2 and tho i miss many things she more than makes up for it

I miss Saturday morning lie-ins with dh, newspaper, cup of tea, toast.
I miss solitude.
I miss having a tidy-ish house and the time to whizz round and do the house work really quickly.
I miss the ease with which you could just go away for a few days or out for the day or for a meal without it turning into a bungled military operation.

Wouldn't swap 'em though!

I miss ME!! I miss adult conversations that aren't about dd (i've become such a baby bore)although I'm finding it difficult to string a sentence together since having dd and I miss my memory - I've definatly left that somewhere. I miss my wonder bra - if it doesnt have easy access I'm not wearing it. It was different before - but I know its better now.

Ames - I miss adult conversations too - I had tea with two fairly new 'friends' last week - is it me being horrible - but I was absolutely bored senseless - there was NO conversation whatsoever unless it was to do with children (their's not mine!!) - and the most trivial subjects at that ie: nappies and potty training, what toys they should have at what age, blah, blah, blah.

I tried changing the subject to a new book club we have started locally - that was ignored!

Do others feel like this sometimes - or am I being unreasonable? Couldn't believe it when one of them rang me to say what a nice afternoon it had been and when could we get together again!

One of the things I enjoyed the most about going back to work post-kids was having conversations with other adults that weren't all about children - and having something else to talk about (sad though - my two topics of conversation are kids and work...).

I can't remember....20 years ago now...you have been warned !

I agree with you Lindy, it can be so hard to wean people off talking about their children. While I find it an easy conversation starter, if after 20 minutes of conversation or 3 months of social contact we haven't progressed beyond what dd or ds had for breakfast and whether they go down the slide sitting up or lying down, I tend to give up. I want to use the brain I had before children and to get to know people as people, not mummies.

Thanks Hilary - at least I am not the only one ! I agree with your solution, have become quite good at 'culling' out people I know I am not going to have a good friendship with.

Tillysmummy -sickness of Dh driving me insane at present. He is festering in bed as we speak, watching Tv and being exhausted. I am just jealous as I would love to be up there reading and demanding merest whims!

I do miss reading anything that requires concentration, clothes that are not covered in food, hot baths and beautycare, lie-ins, playing music I like (not the wheels on the bus) and peace (speaking of which, has anyone read the wonderful"Five minutes peace" by Jill Murphy- very entertaining).
Like everyome else I would not swap it. Certainly dd aged 22 months attempting to sing "Twinkle Twinkle little star" more satisfying than much of my career to date!

Too right CathB - my ds (4.5) bounced into my bed this morning and said "Good morning lovely darling beautiful Mummy!" - and he didn't want anything! How can anything at work compare with that?

Slug, you just reminded me, from the dating game thread, what I miss is going out, getting drunk,and leering at men

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