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Parenting

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Original poster

If you go down to the woods today - will you find chocolate behind every tree? I mean FFS!!!

34 replies

IamBlossom · 30/10/2006 13:36

I often take my two year old (and his bro in his buggy) to the local woods where there are lots of nature trails and he absolutely loves it. A friend has a three year old and has also just had a new baby so I invited them to come too on Saturday afternoon. We were walking along when she produces chocolates wrapped in silver foil with poo bear stickers on them that she has made prior to the walk and proceeds to hide a couple behind practically every other tree we pass without the boys seeing and then saying "Hey boys, I wonder if Winne the Poo has left any treats for you behind THIS tree.....". her 3 year old was obviously expecting this and was searching and finding, and then of course my 2 year old who rarely eats chocolate cos he goes comletely skitz on it runs over and joins in.

Now don't get me wrong, I love imaginary fairy games etc, and the woods are a great place for adventures like seardhing for treasure etc, but by the time we'd finished my DS had a veritable haul of chocolates and you try telling him he can't eat at some of them when his mate is guzzling.... needless to say bed time was later that night cos he was so wired. Next time I will get hold of them all and give him just a couple to eat but I was taken by surprise, and it would have been a bit obvious I disapproved if I'd taken them all off him... Does anyone else think practically bribing your children to exercise and then cancelling out the benefits with the chocolate is a bad idea, or am I just being a hitler...?

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zippitippitoes · 30/10/2006 13:38

sounds an ott idea to me..do you usually go on your own, I would be too much of a coward

covenoveneer · 30/10/2006 13:39

Sounds a bit ott to be honest. What is wrong with a good old fashion nature search. DD (4.5) and ds (almost 2) love collecting leaves, acorns etc

tribpot · 30/10/2006 13:43

That is weird. I like the idea of Winnie leaving things for them to find, but not chocolate.

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Original poster

IamBlossom · 30/10/2006 13:46

exactly, Trib. It could have been anything, a sticker, or something else inexpensive and exciting, if you feel you HAVE to leave presents. Like the previous poster, my DS is fascinated enough with leaves and puddles. Think I'll go by myself this avo.....

OP posts:

threebob · 30/10/2006 13:49

She obviously hasn't ready ghosty's thread about a 7 year old that expects a treat (though not chocolate in Ghosty's case) for putting on his shoes.

You had invited her for a walk - not a treasure hunt.

Zog · 30/10/2006 13:56

Blimey, how judgemental are you lot?? She's got a new baby, she might be feeling guilty about how much attention the 3 year old isn't getting at the moment, so decided to bring along some sweets for a treasure hunt. But that's "ott" and "weird" and she obviously has to bribe him to put one foot in front of the other . And she's never going to get another invite!

Original poster

IamBlossom · 30/10/2006 14:05

I just didn't understand why it had to be chocolate. Which rots their teeth, sends my DS loopy, and is completely unecessary...and yes I suppose I am being judgemental.

OP posts:

Cappuccino · 30/10/2006 14:05

she's just trying too hard

zippitippitoes · 30/10/2006 14:08

I didn't think saying it seemed ott was particualrly judgmental just proffering an opinion not stringing her up ..I'm more interested in the idea of daring to go on a countryside walk on your own..I wouldn't because I'd be scared

Spidermama · 30/10/2006 14:09

I hate this sort of attempt to control kids imaginations, however well meant. Your friend would do well to listen to her children on the walk through the woods as they'll find far better, more imaginative stuff if she lets them, than she could ever produce from behind a tree.
Isn't that the point of children? Well, one of them.

HappyMumof2 · 30/10/2006 14:12

Message withdrawn

BettyBatShapedSpaghetti · 30/10/2006 14:14

We've been for a walk in the woods this morning -my 2 and 6 yr olds were excited and happy enough chasing each other, hiding behind trees, finding acorns and funghi and throwing sticks in a pond.

TBH it wouldn't cross my mind to hide things like chocolates behind trees unless it was Easter.

Next time say you'll provide the "treats" -you could make a trail to find and follow (sticks arranged like arrows) and the children would have a great time following that -maybe have one treat at the end.

hulababy · 30/10/2006 14:16

She was just being nice though wasn't she? If it was every single time she went out, and loads and loads of chocolate, then yes - unnecessary and not that great health wise. BUT we don't know that that is the case here. Sounds like a lady who, when invited out with a friend and child, wanted to make it a bit of extra fun with treats.

Chocolate isn't evil! Yes, stickers, etc might have been better - but she might not have had them at home at the time.

Could have been worse - fruit shoots, Haribo or sausage rolls

Zog · 30/10/2006 14:17

FWIW I completely agree with you about the chocs being unnecessary but I just think it's a bit harsh to drop a friend for this. It's not like she's let your son watch The Omen is it??

Zog · 30/10/2006 14:19

"oh look darling, Winnie's left you a lovely Fruit Shoot behind every tree!"

lol

hulababy · 30/10/2006 14:19

If your child goes a bit mad on chocolate then I think it is entirely appropriate to comment on this to your friend, and to suggest an alternative (if required) - nature trail or whatever.

zippitippitoes · 30/10/2006 14:20

I don't think the op says anything about dropping the friendship does she..

it's just a pity to make a rod for your own back as kiddies will think chocs should be there next time when they probably love the woods for themselves anyway

ludaloo · 30/10/2006 14:20

I'm sure she meant well....

I have a friend who is a bit like that...everything usually has some bizarre story behind it. (she says to her 2 year old..."wave at daddy in the plane" ???????? Obviously daddy isn't in the plane. I think maybe it might be because ds was scared of the plane so she said daddy was on it (he still looks just as scared!!!!!!! maybe a bit confused now too!)

She has bizarre words for things too...
"oh do you need a nonny noo?" (poo)
A horse is a neigh neigh
A pig is an oinky boink!!!!!!

(I know she means well though!!!

FIMBOnABroomstick · 30/10/2006 14:20

Well said Hula. I think you should be thanking her instead of griping about her on here.

Cappuccino · 30/10/2006 14:21

I don't see why stickers are any better

they should all be just enjoying the Great Outdoors

if she was going to bring anything along, it should have been something like a real live bear

ludaloo · 30/10/2006 14:22

p.s to address the PO point (sorry got a bit sidetracked)

Your friend could of at least warned you of her plans, as it wasn't entirely fair was it.

NothingButAttitudeOnMN · 30/10/2006 14:24

Oh ffs, so she bought along some chocolates that she may have had left over from a halloween party or something and hid them behind trees for the kids to find, what is the problem.

Does she continually force feed yours and her children sweets whenever you see them? I doubt it, is she a good friend whos company you enjoy? I expect so otherwise you wouldn't have invited her.

What is the problem?

HappyMumof2 · 30/10/2006 14:34

Message withdrawn

pooka · 30/10/2006 14:46

Am lvoing the idea of real grizzly bears behind every tree! NOw that would really spice things up.
Or "watch out for those bear traps".
I personally think it was a lovely idea. Don't think that unless you repeat it frequently a child will expect chocolate every time. You just emphasise that that occasion was a treat.
But then I don't see what's so bad about chocolate in moderation anyway. My children have a chocolate button each with their milk while in the bath before teeth brushing. (started when both had to have grim medicine, then carried on because couldnt't see the harm).

Original poster

IamBlossom · 30/10/2006 19:15

She is a good friend and I do enjoy her company. I certainly won't be dropping her as a friend! I have found since having kids however that it doesn't matter how good a friend she might be, the way you raise your kids can differ wildly. She does do this choccie hiding thing every time they go for a walk cos she told me she did. I just don't think the whole pressie thing treat thing is necessary, you can play "ooh look here's a fairy swimming pool" game without having to give them a treat. So i shall do that when we next go for a walk together.

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