How many of you do never shout at your kids? And what's your secret?

[emkana]

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Anybody ever watching Kids programmes like "Little Bill" or "Little Bear" forinstance and wish you could be that kind of parent?

Never heard of those programmes what are they about, tell me more

3and But our children aren't like Little Bill or Little Bear either.

I don't think shouting or not has anything to do with being kind and thoughtful, rather whether it's effective or not. In our case with DS it isn't (he doesn't hear) so we have other ways of showing him he's reached our limit.

F&Z I can't say i'd love to meet your friend. She sounds a bit dull. But then she'd lie, so she IS human after all.

Medulla...they are programmes on Nick Junior, aimed at pre school children!

Clumsymum...that is true, lol!

I just don't. Not a shouter. Think when I shout I sound like a banshee.

DH has a very, very deep voice which sounds quite authoritative w/o needing to be raised.

So those that don't shout tend to use low threatening tones, not sure which one is "better"??????

I just wish I was calm all the time, explaining etc. not losing it.

Dh is always so patient, but then he's not with them all the time.

I can honestly say that my mum never shouted at any of us when we were growing up (I am one of 4). She is just naturally an incredibly patient person. I would love to be like her but have a much shorter temper.

I hate shouting.
To be honest I count. I'll ask three times and if I still don't get a response, I smack.
Usually works.

I shout - I often regret it - particualryl when shouted at one dissolves into tears because I have frightened them .

DH does not show - he gets of them and gets very close and talks very quietly - it frightens them just as much sometimes .

I guess neither approach is ideal - but we are human and not perfect parents and are just doing our best at the time.

particualryl - normal spelling would be particularly

oops - - DH doesn not shout - must learn to preview or type properly.

I don't shout. I sometimes speak more loudly, but in a very controlled way so it doesn't feel like shouting. The only time I would shout is if they were about to do something that could endanger one of them - i.e. about to fall off something, or going too near the road - and then only to shock them and make sure I'm heard before an accident happens.
My secret is that I shout at my dh instead....a lot! I also swear a lot at the children inside my head, while being ever so nice and patient on the outside...which could probably lead to all manner of mental illnesses...so perhaps not the best thing!

I dont shout on a day to day basis, mainly because I lived in a row of houses, I lived at munber 3, at number 7 there was a woman with 3 kids who started the day shouting at her kids...."For gods sake cant you just sit there and eat that" Sccccrreeeeccchhhhhhhhh" How many times have I asked you to get dressed...F**ing Hurry up"...."Have you still not done that...HURRY UP" and so it went, from 7am, till they left for school at 8.30am. Constant. And of course, not one of the children listened when she did shout, because it was like the noise of the telly in the background. It didnt ever stop. you would hear her returning with them at home time...and so it would begin again till bedtime.
So I made a effort not to do the same, because it would be easy to shout at the kids for everything, it wouldnt achieve anything though.
If I shout its because someones done something wrong, or stupid or dangerous, or they are fighting and i need them to stop right that second.
They do as they are told mainly, or I count to 5 with the threat of something. And I always follow through.

I hate shouting. I do it, but I know that if I'm shouting on a regular basis, I'm being crap.
Why are you shouting Emkana? Is it because the kids are in a different room, not doing what you tell them, being naughty, because they are not listening? On my good non-shouty days I can tackle these things well, but when I'm tired & hassled I end up shouting.
Tell us what is making you shout?

I do shout sometimes . Not very happy with myself when I do though, so have been taking the vitb6 for pms and trying to take a moment before bellowing. Am finding quiet deliberate sentences more effective now.
I had never thought of myself as a shouter but when DD started to shout at her siblings I realised who she got it from.

I shout after I've asked ds1 on more than several ocassions to do something or stop doing something. He's only 19mths, but I know he understands what he's asked, he has very selective hearing.
Also bedtime is very stressful and I end up screaming at him when its just me putting him to bed when dh is at work. Juggling with a screaming 4 week old ds2 too doesn't help, it just adds to the problem.
Need a solution to ease bedtime stress as I hate shouting then, bedtimes should be calm and relaxing, not a battleground. I hate myself for being so evil to him

to all the non shouters.

Never used that smiley before, it's cute!

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