do you/how often do you have a day to yourself?

[Writergirl]

Gathering opinions!

How many of you who work and / have kids actually have time to yourselves, e.g. for a whole day or more? And when and how do you do it? And what does your partner/think or do?

I'm starting to feel a bit stir crazy as my routine as a working mum mean my life is either work or kids, and our weekends because we work, are devoted to the children or doing household necessities.

I realised I haven't had a day purely to myself for a year or more!

I have obviously had holidays etc, and even weekends away, but that still doesn't help me get stuff done that I need to do!

I also mean a whole day, not just an hour having coffee whilst waiting for my child to finish their activities. That is nice, but I have non urgent things that I'd like to get done and I feel guilty doing that at the weekend.

Your thoughts?

Thanks :-)

Never. Although I am being made redundant soon, and don't want to lose dd's nursery place, so she will keep going even if I have no job. Not sure if I'd class that as time to myself though, as I'll be frantically applying for jobs!

Never, sahm.

Myth. I can't even remember what time to myself for a whole day feels like. Saying that, I'm not bothered. DS is such an easy going toddler that I manage to get everything done (breakfast, cleaning, shower, laundry hung or folded) by 9:30 then the rest of the day is spent playing or lounging. I'm 36 weeks pregnant and I'm dreading the change but oh well!

DH leaves the house by 8 and isn't back until 10 so I do everything myself.

SAHM. I get about 5 hours every Saturday when dh takes the dc to soft play. I could also "book" a whole day on the weekend if I asked dh in advance. I do the same for him quite often. Can go out any evening, as can he if the other one hasn't got plans.

I'd go completely insane without these windows of freedom. With a 1yo and a 3yo I feel a bit like I'm underwater all the time breathing through a snorkel, and I only breathe real air when I'm not responsible for them. That sounds extreme, it's not that bad, but I need time when someone else is responsible for them, so I can recharge.

I really admire people who don't feel this need so strongly, and I realise I'm very lucky to get regular time to myself.

Mon-Fri 8.30-3.30 Im on my own to do as I wish.

Kids are 7 & 5 and at school. I dont work.

I had a day at the end of maternity leave with both children in nursery. It was lovely.

Probably about once a year, when I have holiday and kids at nursery/school+afterschool. I would have had time at Christmas but MrNC was wrestling with keeping the house watertight for most of it, so I had to do childcare. I work 3 days a week.

Now the house is waterproof I can get a few hours off every couple weeks, and we even managed both me and MrNC going out for the evening last weekend, for the first time in 2 years!

Because I don't have a paid job I have no childcare in place so can only have a day off when dh takes a days annual leave specifically for me (he looks after the kids whilst I have free time).
If you have a job can you not take annual leave and send the children to childcare as usual? That's what I dream of doing one day when I actually manage to get a job.

Sahm with a 14 month old. I get one day 9 to 5 a week to myself.
I'm lucky.
I do just do the shopping, housework and snooze though.

Frequently - DH and I often take turns to have a day to ourselves at weekends, we always have. You can make it work if you want to (assuming you have a DH/DP). Evenings we often do our own things -we have our own hobbies and interests, no need for both of us to stay in every night .

He goes off and does his sporty things - I do whatever I want, sometimes voluntary work, shopping, visiting a friend, in the summer my favourite thing to do is spend a day at an outside pool not this time of year obviously on my own.

We prefer to do this rather than always have 'family time' at weekends which in our experience has always revolved around lots of arguing about trying to find something we are all happy doing. .

Writergirl - why doesn't your DH take the children out for a day and leave you in peace?

When dp can accomodate,he'd do so if I asked and vice versa
I lunch,go theatre,get hair done

I get most of a day once every couple of weeks. I work shifts so need childcare available for every day of the week. I only work 3 days a week but they are not set days. DD goes to nursery 2 days a week and sometimes my day off is on a nursery day. However, I still have to get up at 7.15 to get her ready, then do stuff once she gets home at 4.30ish. I usually spend the day doing housework and other stuff that is easier without her rather than anything that I particularly enjoy.