friend finger in my baby's mouth.

[susan1985]

A friend of mine wanted to hold my baby and I let her. Why not?
Then she put her finger in his mouth, because the baby has been unsettled since this weekend.
I think he's teething and she just wanted to feel.

I was surprised. I said: Maybe better not to do that.

Because for some silly reason I wanted to stay nice. But in my head I was saying totally different things to her!!!!!!!!

Now I just wish I could turn back time and that I didn't let her hold him.

I know I'm probably way to worried about everything. I've a postnatal depression. I got help for it and I'm getting better and better every week. But I still worry, way to much.

Now all kinds of thoughts flow around in my head. If he's going to be fine or not.
He most likely will be fine.

I should be more worried about his first tooth coming and I'm still breastfeeding him. When that tooth comes.... I think I'll be in for a painful surprise.

It doesn't matter if I become 100 or 200. I'll NEVER understand why people think they can just touch someone else's baby.
And thankfully she wasn't a stranger, but why on earth would it be ok to just put your finger in a baby's mouth????

Because the baby can't say: 'I don't like this'. Maybe I just should have pushed my finger in her mouth without asking and see what she would have thought about that.

And she got kids herself! They aren't this young anymore, but when they were. I can't believe she would have liked it if someone would have done that to her baby.

Ppfff nice to be able to share it over here with others.

Personally it wouldn't have bothered me.

People did it to my son when he was teething to feel for them. He will be totally fine.

The baby will have far worse than a friends finger in their mouth. Wait until they discover worms.

It is grim isn't it? My best friend did it and even though I lover her to bits, it did make me feel a bit ick inside. I didn't say anything and no harm came from it. I think it's one of those things you need to let go.

How old is your baby? Mine is 8 months. MIL put her finger in his mouth yesterday. She won't be doing that again. He bites like a hamster.

Unless she had arsenic on her finger then really no harm has been done.

If you can't cope with a finger how the hell will you cope with cat biscuits, wood lice, gravel etc that they WILL put in their mouths.

Germs are good. Helps build immunity. My kid stopped getting sick as soon as she started eating grass!! :o

You're right about babies not being able to verbalise their wants and needs - but they do find other ways! How old is your LO? Soon he'll be grubbing round on the floor eating the most despicable things you could imagine . DD has a penchant for shoes, the dirtier the better.

It sounds like you've had a time of it, but please don't worry so much - it's good for him o be held by and interact with others, it's social and stimulating. And it's definitely good for him to be exposed to a reasonable quantity of scrud - far more so than to be too clean. He will be better than fine.

Grass is also handy when you can't find a healthy snack in the cupboards.

I'm joking.

It wouldn't bother me, but then I caught him with the toddlers dirty shoe in his mouth the other day. My friends fingers are likely to be cleaner than that

night

Even with an array of healthy snacks to choose pet food nuggets were still the snack of choice :o

She was probably trying to sooth him, sometime pressing their gums helps with teething pain. Strange that it would bother you. Does she not bath very often?

It will have done your baby no harm at all - honestly. Please try not to worry about it - people have been putting their fingers in babies' mouths since the dawn of time, and the human race has not dies out.

Ah, don't worry, he'll be fine.
But I agree with you it's a bit unnecessary of your friend - I've let my babies suck my finger but would be a bit if somebody else did it.

He'll be fine and will explore more disgusting things with his mouth when he gets a chance.

DS1 used to lick DMs dog. On the tongue. He hasn't been ill since 2011. Scientific research right there.

Oh, and btw, babies with teeth don't necessarily hurt when BFing (they might need a little time to adjust, but that's all. Biting is another story...)

It's pretty common to check a baby's teeth by feel, and she probably thought she was helping by proving that teething is causing the grumps rather than your parenting iyswim. She meant no harm and he would've let her know if he objected

Fwiw I'm still bf my 13mo who has 7 front teeth and at least 2 molars (he lets me know if he doesn't want my finger in checking!!) and, while it's a bit scratchier than before, it's not a big deal and certainly not something a couple of doses of lansinoh couldn't help with in the early stages. Two ways to deal with biting are 1) latch off immediately, say No very sternly and pop them down for a few seconds (ds realised he'd done wrong and only did it the once!) or 2) push their head gently into your boob which forces them to unlatch and breath through their mouth, loosening the teeth. We didn't have to try that one as the yelp and put down method worked if you're worried, put teething gel on before the feed - use a clean baby tooth brush (which sets up positive associations in itself) if you're worried about your fingers

Grass grows in the ground. Therefore it's a vegetable.

Also, it grows without the use of pesticides. It's an organic vegetable.

They should sell it in Waitrose alongside the blackberries

See home grown organic fruit and veg. All I need is my garden and te brambles on the field. dds really did eat their body weight in blackberries picked themselves :o

Because the baby can't say: 'I don't like this'

They don't need to, they have effective ways of making it plain! Quite probably they do like it-everything goes in the mouth. Really, don't worry about it.

If she was teething, DD1 would have wanted the person holding her to give her a finger to chew.

Her favourite, go everywhere, equivalent of a dummy was a cheap, light tea thing ring. The rabbits ears substituted for mummies fingers quite nicely.

Unfortunately mummies fingers had to make push the push chair.

Make food or push

Hooo my goodness, discovering worms... The baby then might be fine, but me? The though of it alone already makes me go nuts.

He's just a couple of months. Quite young for to get his first teeth. I first thought I was wrong. But health visitor had a good look at him and yes he's teething, I wasn't wrong.

@rodneythecristmaself
Thanks for sharing that. Then I think if she does it again when his teeth is there..... It'll be the last time she made the mistake of just puting her finger in his mouth.

So true, I need to be more relaxed about things and yes it helps him building up his immune system.
It's a problem of mine. Comes I think with the pnd. We do chat about it and that I should relax more. keeping everything clean is ok, I'm doing it to much.
I know that most likely he'll be fine. Although to be honest I still find it weird to just put your finger in a baby's mouth. Harmful or not, I just find it weird that people think it's ok to do that without asking first.

I know the problem is really on my side and I should worry more about his teeth that's coming and me breastfeeding him.
I can't imagine that it will feel comfortable when has got his first teeth.

But thoughts like:
has she washed her hands after she went to the loo?
what else has she been touching before she touched my baby?
will he be fine?

Close friends of us. Their baby became very very ill when he was young. He has been in hospital and they were worried that things might really go wrong with him.

It was horrible. He got infected with something that normally lives in our intestines, but when infected by it it can become very serious especially for the weak. Like young babies.
Infection usually happens if someone doesn't wash his/her hands and then touches food or something that goes in the mouth.

Although that happened to close friends of us. I know he probably will be fine, but......
It's hard to stop those thoughts and it's really nice to be able to share those here online with you all.

Its a finger. Not poison. You do know your baby will wrap its chops round all sorts of filth before his first year is over? Licking his shoes, the toys at mother and toddler group, the handle bar on the trolley, the living room rug, the window, the snot hanging down from his nose

Awwww love,you do sound very stressed, are you having treatment or help for PND?

Don't worry about breastfeeding a baby with teeth, it's fine, not a problem at all, my two both had full sets of teeth by the time is finished breastfeeding.

Your friend was prob just excited at such a wee baby cutting teeth so just wanted a little feel.

yes, I've help for it and it works. Things are getting better and better.

Also nice to hear that there're mothers on here who breastfed their babies when they had teeth.

My first thought was: how am I going to breastfeed him? That's it. I won't be able to continue when his teeth is there.