The walk of shame home from nursery

[AryaofhouseQuark]

Is killing me.
My Dts -3, are so much hard work on the way home from nursery.

They roll around on the floor and refuse to get up, hold on to poles and refuse to walk, they fight on the street over who presses buttons on the pedestrian green man thingy, they refuse to hold my hand to cross a road, then fight each other over which of my hands they want to hold.

It's less than a miles walk and they usually walk really nicely, I know it's probably tiredness and have tried taking a buggy instead, but they just beat each other up in the buggy, they even took their wellies off and hit each other over the head with them.

They do fight like a lot of other siblings do, but at home and out and about they are pretty good, discipline works and they usually listen when given a warning. The walk home is something else.
What can I do ?
Tia.

Oh bless - no advice really other than to keep saying "This too will pass".

they sound hilarious

Take lots of snacks and feed them as soon as you get out of nursery.

Not a walk of shame at all - we've all been there.

Lol, I read your op while thinking "this too will pass" and "feed them" and then saw the first two replies.

In the buggy, with food.

If they keep fighting, put their coats on without putting their arms in the sleeves .

DSD used to do this - I started doing a nature trail thing on the way home - bit of a faff but it does keep them occupied - a sheet of paper each with things to tick off as they find them? A leaf, a twig, etc?

Is it possible to drive? I know it's a short distance but its what I would do, just till this stage has passed.

Bribery?

Is there a playground or somwhere they can stop off on the way back? Or a shop you pass where they can get sweets if they have walked nicely?

thanks.
I will try snacks, I should have though of that. They did actually walk nicely the other day when we stopped off at the "lolly pop shop" so I should have put 2 and 2 together. They love fruit so will meet them tomorrow with a big banana each and a cereal bar.

Oh dear I feel for you! I struggle with my 2 walking home every day at the moment! Only one is at nursery and she is fine - but will only walk with her toy buggy.

The other (right in the middle of terrible two's) is just like you describe - I spent all last week carrying her home in various positions as she pulled my hair and kicked me whilst screaming!!

So this week I'm forcing her to sit in the buggy if she won't walk nicely....but then my other one has a strop as she wants to push this buggy.....if she does the other starts trying to hit her!

When in the buggy I have found constantly talking or playing games help. Currently "theres a big bad wolf" is the favourite - does mean being quiet and slow then running - so very tiring for me but stops the screaming!

I'm putting faith in the "its just a phase!" saying!

My first thought was food too! I would also try games to play along the way eye spy (with colours rather than letters) or funny walks and singing songs (which would really just replace one walk of shame with another!) but it will get better!

Nature trail an excellent idea, or a sort of I spy? Who is the first one to spot a yellow car? That one saved a few journeys for us (then go for orange, then pink).

But yes, this won't last forever and they do sound fabulous.

They will have concentrated really hard to behave the whole time at nursery and then need to let go a little in front of the person they feel safest with. Both of my boys, when older than yours have explained in their words 'It is really hard to behave all of the time and now I just have to let it out'. It's harder when they are younger as they have less understanding and less control. They will also be tired after all of this concentration and activity.

I had to smile at taking their wellies off to neat each other up in the buggy, sorry!!

Ideas, Coats on backwards? Arms still inside? Though perhaps offering them some rather 'crazy' activities on the way home might work, singing, picking stones to make a house when you get home, bear hunting, green man light is electrified and Mummy turns into a zombie if she presses it. Ask nursery to put their coats on before you get there for a week or so to get them out of the habit of fighting with you over it.

No I have tried bribery Sirzy, it worked for a little while - maybe a minuet, then they carried on being toads.
No sparkly, I am learning to drive so it's not an option at the moment.

Oh, I've been there. It gets better. Slowly. Does bribery help? Banana chips and singing silly songs constantly were the only thing that could get DS1 home from nursery sometimes. We also did counting every step out loud. I'm sure I looked a complete twit to everyone else, but hey, it was that or stand in the middle of the street while DS1 rolled around on the pavement howling. Having a drink often worked better than a snack because it kept his hands occupied for longer.

Thanks everyone, will use the ideas of games on the way home they are brilliant.

Misty that makes perfect sense about being really well behaved at nursery, as we left the other day the staff thanked them for being good listeners and I did this

When my nearly 3yo is like this I put him in the buggy with something that takes a while to eat - a box of raisins or grapes, something like that

When my daughter was small and later as a childminder with three at nursery age, we had backpacks with the straps (littlelife) and we had games like jungle adventures. Manhole covers were snake pits to be jumped over, cars were lions and you had to cover your eyes (so the lion wouldnt see you...it wasnt a busy road!) a particular kerb (that was from a footpath into a usually empty carpark) was a tightrope walk over a river and we had to walk sideways holding hands.

We played "freeze" (as in run, and be a statue when I shout freeze!) and i also included baby steps and bunny hops and dinosaur stomps with sound effects. Obv that needs to be a safe place away from cars.

In a carpark (closed off) that we walked through I shouted a shape and they had to find and stand on it. circle (water cover), rectangle (zebra crossing type path or drainage grate) zigzag ( area marked around disabled car parking spot.

Can you make up similar games based on your walk? Is there a park that you can swing by as a treat for nice walking?

I really shouldn't laugh but they do sound comical and rather like the twins that ds used go to nursery with, one of whom was hit by a car (he was ok), but I would be very firm re the hand holding to cross the road. Bribery is useful here, eg if they hold your hand they get a treat at the shop or whatever.
What about scooters or bikes? Ds scoots everywhere, it keeps him busy and gets us from A to B quickly.

Thanks will make the walk home more fun, loving the games suggestions. I don't think I could handle them both on a scooter on my own, they are not adept at scooting, in fact they only really crash and fall off.

Sorry OP, but I had to laugh at them hitting each other with their wellies!

I laughed too tbh.

They sound great! Are they boys or girls or one of each?

When my DD was little she was terrible in the supermarket but pretty good elsewhere. I started making her a shopping list. She couldn't read so I drew lots of little pictures and she then enjoyed it because she was in charge (or so she thought!) with the list. I gave her a clipboard and pen and she had a great time.

Could you make a very simple bingo game with things to spot? Or look for colours? Or how many orange things will we see on the way home? How many number 2s will we see? (I mean the number, not dog muck!) Just things like that with a very small reward for playing well all the way home.

Great games bluecarrot!

Not a walk if shame OP! It once took me 25 mins to get three houses down from mine when ds was 2.5ish.

This too shall pass!

Two boys primrose, they are great fun, they are really funny and make me laugh very day. They are in the dining room atm banging on the window and waving at people walking past, while I relax and have a nice cup of coffee.
Thanks for the reassurance everyone, it's nice to be reminded that it happens to everyone and that it's just a phase.

Oh I'm sorry, I know how difficult it is and I only had one (very very hyperactive) one! I'm afraid your description did make me laugh though! It's definitely not a walk of shame and you will come through it, eventually being able to laugh too!! xx