So the mother who slut-shamed her daughter on ebay and sold her tickets to the One Direction concert

[BasilBabyEater]

Story is here

Can I vent here? It keeps coming up on my facebook page and I know there are probably people (my cousin) who would comment "You go Mom!" and "awesome parenting!!!!!" and I would have to de-friend them and cause a family diplomatic incident.

There is nothing awesome about this. I have 4 issues with it

1. Selling her birthday present. Not sure where I stand on this, I don't know how sacrosanct birthday presents should be, will await instruction on that.

1. Humiliating her daughter in public. Fucking no. Just no. I wonder what else goes in behind closed doors if she sees nothing wrong with what she said in front of the whole fucking world

1. Slut-shaming her daughter and her daughter's friends. WTF? Just WTF really. Too inchoherent to express anything else atm.

1. Her truly disgusting remarks about the families of her daughter's friends. I hope some of the mothers she's referring to tell her what a nasty piece of work she is for the remarks she made - in public- about them.

I'm finding it really depressing that it keeps coming up on my facebook on various American sites with stupid posts underneath by idiots suggesting more abusive ways of dealing with it. Please douse me in some Mumsnet sanity.

Yes, about 3 times I composed responses and then thought oh fuck it, what's the point.

Part of me thinks I should make more of an effort not to let the internet be owned by these idiots. And then the other part thinks nah, soddit, there's some apple pie there, I'll eat that instead.

Shockingly bullying behaviour by the mother. I can't see how her relationship with her DD can survive the total public humiliation of her and slating of her friends and their mothers.

Sell the tickets- maybe. But do it quietly and with regret, not with anger and insults.

Interesting point you made OP especially point 2 in your list:

At aged 10, my mum said something very personal and humiliating about me to a group of friends we'd met on holiday while I was there.

And YES, you surmised correctly in that in my case I can tell you
MUCH MORE WENT ON BEHIND CLOSED DOORS.

I feel that adults have much more 'power' in any given situation compared to children - and I personally think that this type of behaviour from adults is DISGUSTING.

I think that is an absolutely horrible thing to do to a teenager.

Ive seen a few of those videos online.

I think they are awful for many reasons.

Oh god, just read the link.

She sounds hideous.

I think it's made up.

Sell the ticket without fuss, move on having taught a lesson and stayed true to your word. Everything else is a terrible parenting lesson to teach your teenage daughter about how to bully and humiliate your way to getting your own way rather than earning respect. I really hope this isn't real.

Fucking horrendous.

I can understand revoking a gift/reselling it for poor behaviour, but not insulting your child.

I also totally disagree with the 'parents DESERVE love' attitude. WTF. You don't get to do shit like that and then demand love, that's nuts.

Cancelling the birthday treat - ok, if the daughter's behavour has been beyond the pale, and she's not responded to other sanctions.

Humiliating her in public - really not ok. parenting is not about point scoring.

A bit off track but in the comments a person.says all but 3 of the girls in her high school class became pregnant " it was a small town with very few activities"

I think the mother sounds very nasty and almost gleeful about the punishment. .

I can't believe someone would publicly humiliate their child like this. That child is going to hate their mother for a very long time. They'll never forget it and I doubt very much they will look back and say 'oh yes, she was right o do that'

My guess is that the entire story is made up and, instead, some ticket tout wanted to shift the tickets in a way that would garner a lot of publicity and hence push the price up. But I'm cynical like that

I thought this too.

My Mum was very much my Mum.

She was also my friend. I could trust her to do the right thing by me. She had rules and she had standards but as my friend, I could trust that she would stand by me, stick up for me, fight my corner and never publically humiliate me in such a way.

I never really rebelled: didn't have much to rebel against to be honest. Every 'rule' was completely reasonable (don't jump on the sofa because it'll break, no you're not going to the fairground with your friends as I don't think it's safe.)

Even if it's made up I do know parents like this and I hate it.

Thank you for this OP. Selling the tickets may be a reasonable response. Public shaming isn't, all the more so as things never vanish off the internet. Horrible.

I hope this is made up. But there again, there are plenty of nasty, toxic parents around.

I actually think selling the tickets would be wrong no matter how she did it.

From this to that horrible woman who forced her 11 yo to stand at a junction holding a placard apologizing for twerking at a school disco to the double standarded Christian who wrote a blog about barring girls from her sons' FB. Pages while featuring them posing topless in a show off muscle man human pyramid I am sick to death of the new Puritan mysoyny in the US that humiliates young women over their emerging experiments with their sexuality. Fake or not (and I hope it is) can you imagine that tirade written against a teen son for similar behaviour. Even if the tix were being sold?

And let's lose phrases like 'slut shaming'

I can imagine a situation in which one of my dses was behaving really badly, and I finally got to the point of threatening to sell the gig tickets I had bought for them and their friends. And I can imagine carrying that threat out, if the behaviour was bad enough.

I can even imagine myself saying something in the ebay ad to the effect that I had said I would sell the tickets, and you pushed the limits once too often, and this is me carrying out my threat - but I cannot ever imagine myself saying such horrible things about my children or their friends. Not ever.

It hadn't even occurred to me that this might be a ruse to drive up the price of the tickets - but I really hope it is. If not, I suspect that family is damaged beyond repair by this.

Selling the tickets is fine, the mums language and attempt to shame and humiliate her daughter is not OK, its vile.

And the big slug of vile language about women being trollps and sluts, and generally slagging girls off will have been a large part of it having gone viral.

It feeds a need to be vile about women considered to be 'trollops'.

Had the mother simply said it was for being rude and dishonest there would not have been the glee with which this has spread.

Vile.

Yes, that's a very good point, of course that's why it went viral, you are absolutely right.

Urgh. The horrible fucker.

I would have sold the tickets and have been hugely pissed off at the lies, but I wouldn't dream of this. And I agree with the fact that I am dd's mother and not her friend. But I respect her. I wouldn't deliberately humiliate my daughter like that.

I hope you're right and this is all made up.

But how HORRIBLE. And the fact that so many people agree with this.

Perhaps the people vociferously agreeing with this are not the parents of teenagers.

The whole language smacks of utter dislike and disdain for her daughter.