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Baby won't go in buggy, need advice

29 replies

Neiffer · 09/08/2013 06:38

Morning all
Need some advice. Have 2 ds, 18 months and 5 weeks. We have a double buggy (side by side) and the baby just screams the minute he's put in it until he's taken out. I generally resort to the sling for travelling around with him. However, I really need him to be able to go in the buggy and ideally sleep in it! Does anyone have any advice or tips? I don't mind using sling but its not ideal all the time and he needs to get used to buggy. He won't take a dummy despite persevering. I think part of the problem is that he doesn't sleep on his back but his side/front as he isn't comfy on his back. Help!

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Mummysaysno · 09/08/2013 06:43

I would say hang in there - my DC4, now 10 weeks, will go in the buggy, but only in the last week or so - before that would cry, so was in the sling.

MortifiedAdams · 09/08/2013 06:45

Is his side a carrycot? if so I would lay him.on his tummy.

Neiffer · 09/08/2013 06:47

That's good to know mummy, were your other dc the same? No its not a carrycot unfortunately, its reclined all the way back but not feasible to put him on his front.

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RubyGoat · 09/08/2013 06:50

Have you generally used the sling up to now? We did with DD & TBH we felt like we'd made a rod for our own backs as she then didn't like the pram. She did get used to it but it took a good few weeks.

I did love the sling & will use it again when (if) we have another, but this time I will be prepared & make sure the next baby also goes in pram & gets used to that too.

Good luck, you just have to be a bit hard with them I think, our DD loves her buggy now.

Mummysaysno · 09/08/2013 06:51

All different - DC1 was fine with buggy. DC2 was in the back of a Phil and Teds and loved it (snug, cosy and dark). DC3 then came along, and screamed his head off when in the back of the Phil and Teds - literally screamed the entire time, because he was not a snuggly baby, so I then had to (with 3 little ones I was desperate for peace!) buy a twin maclaren, which he was happy in, as he could see what was going on! DC4 is another snuggly baby, so prefers sling, but will now tolerate buggy for stretches of time - which my back is thankful for!
It will pass - just at the time feels impossible I know!!!

Neiffer · 09/08/2013 06:54

We be alternated Lego, so don't think we've made the problem worse but that's exactly what I'm worried about doing. He just gets absolutely hysterical, its awful! But I don't want to not put him in buggy as I think he needs to get used to it. Although hopefully he'll grow out of it...he's the same in his car seat so maybe he just wants the hugs!

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Neiffer · 09/08/2013 06:55

Do any of you know of any ways we could make it less distressing for him? Surely there's some magic tricks...

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sleepywombat · 09/08/2013 07:01

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Mummysaysno · 09/08/2013 07:08

Honestly - I don't think we do make rods for our own backs - I just think it's luck of the draw - some babies are just more chilled out than others, some love buggies, and hate slings and vice versa. The problem is that as parents, we also have our own practical needs to manage, which may mean that a buggy or sling is easier for us, but doesn't always match what the DC wants! And we all know that babies are not as well mannered in letting their needs be known, so will tell us by screaming at us, which is hard to manage after two hours sleep!
If there's any way practically you can keep going with single stroller for older DC, and sling for baby, then do - purely so you don't feel like a failure every time baby screams at you as you put him/her in the stroller. Then try once a week or so, and hopefully at some point, baby will have grown in to it.

Neiffer · 09/08/2013 07:10

Good advice thank you. I think ill do as you say and try every so often. Ds1 wouldn't tolerate a sling, strange babies!

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Sunnysummer · 09/08/2013 07:13

Does he have reflux? Refluxy DS jas also liked sleeping on front or side and at 4 months will still only tolerate very short periods in the pram when fully awake and happy. Fwiw, he actually prefers the slight recline to the carrycot - but neither as much as the sling!

We got lots of rod-for-own-back / spoilt-PFB advice, so originally tried to get him used to it by playing in it, feeding in it, going on long long walks with it (only once did he eventually scream himself to an exhausted sleep, only to wake up 10 minutes later still inconsolable). I eventually realised that when family friends and the other girls at mothers group kept telling me that their babies 'got used to it', they meant after a few walks around the living room or some tears on a long stroll, nothing like this. We now still use the pram as a sort of mobile seat/playroom, as it gives me a break from holding him when I'm out, and in the hope that when his reflux starts getting better, he will see it as a fun place.

Not wanting to be too depressing, and I do hope you manage it - but hopefully this will at least make you feel less alone than I did if you can't, and not subject your DS to all the discomfort that I did in my quest for the elusive stroller sleep!

ceeveebee · 09/08/2013 07:24

What kind of buggy do you have - can you get a cocoon thing that might make him feel more snugly?
Is it parent facing? Perhaps he wants to see you?

Neiffer · 09/08/2013 07:30

Not reflux but bad wind so that won't help. Thanks for making me feel less like its just me!
It's an out n about nipper double so he's not facing us unfortunately. I did wonder about getting a universal cocoon for it but I think it might be bit hot in this weather and then he 'll be too big for it come autumn, or am I wrong do you think? He has a newborn support in which holds him in a bit more than just straps...

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Rooners · 09/08/2013 07:35

He probably is really uncomfortable - it isn't a case of 'getting used to it' if it hurts them to be in it, they can't tell you any other way Sad

My third hated his car seat and though we did have to use it for short journeys, and other times he slept in it, when he cried I took him out and held him till he settled - it was frustrating - and the same with lying flat in the pram.

I ended up carrying him LOADS till he was a couple of months old.

I think some babies have a lot of wind, that you can't do much about, and lying down is agony for them. You just have to do whatever it takes for them not to be crying, in case they are in pain. It won't last forever...mine is 7 months now, still doesn't like to be on his back, but I sit him up a bit at an angle which helps enormously.

You could try the same in your pram? Put a rolled up towel behind him, one either side - so he's propped up. It really helped mine when he was tiny and meant we could go out without having to hold him AND push the pram.

Rooners · 09/08/2013 07:36

Ooh if it's a Nipper then can you raise the back for him? I know they are MEANT to lie flat but if it hurts them then honestly, what is the point?

As long as he isn't in it for very long periods of time he will be fine.

Neiffer · 09/08/2013 08:54

I have thought about raising his side rooners and I might do it actually, so long as his heads supported it might work. Annoying its either up or flat on nipper, no inbetween. Or try the towel thing. I suspect its a combo of discomfort and wanting the close contact.

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cooper44 · 09/08/2013 09:20

Neither of mine would ever go in carrycot. With DS1 I just used to have him in babybjorn while pushing empty pram. Ds2 exactly the same and I probably gave up much sooner. Once he could sit up in the pushchair he was fine. I'm not sure there's a solution if they don't like lying flat. ESP when they are so small. I tried nest etc. nothing worked.

MiaowTheCat · 09/08/2013 13:08

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Neiffer · 09/08/2013 13:31

Sounds like we have the same version miaow, although I don't really understand your instructions! (5 week old = no brain function). The seats are either flat or reclined a bit from upright, is yours the same? If so, how do you semi recline it? Might look into a carrycot, can't help thinking it'll be a waste of cash for the time he'd fit into it though...I did look into it when we bought the buggy and a lot of them clip into the nipper.

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MiaowTheCat · 09/08/2013 14:03

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RubyGoat · 09/08/2013 18:51

Sympathy on the hysterical screaming baby issue as well, OP. Our DD also does this. I feel so like everyone is judging me, when I am walking home as fast as possible with DD absolutely bellowing like she is being tortured. Daren't take her out to cuddle & calm down though as she will just start again as soon as I put her back in, & struggles & won't let me strap her back in & it makes her even more angry, & she is way too big to carry all the way home as well as pushing the buggy laden with shopping. So I just have to put my head down & steam ahead, it's really horrible so I do feel for you.

Dirtymistress · 09/08/2013 18:57

No advice but lots of sympathy. I have a 17 month gap too. Ds2 is 5 months tomorrow and still screams and screams in the buggy. I too use a sling but it just isn't always practical, like if it's raining I can't hold brolly over me and ds2 and push very heavy ds1. It's a nightmare.Hmm

CunfuddledAlways · 09/08/2013 19:03

try putting one of your tops in at first, so it smells like you - baby may settle easier

chocolatemartini · 09/08/2013 19:12

DS hated his buggy until about 14 months. I gave up after various traumatic trips and used the sling full time. I agree there's no such thing as a rod for your back, just different babies have different preferences. Hope you work out a happy solution for all 3 of you

rootypig · 09/08/2013 19:16

I think make it more snuggly. DD fit in the bugaboo cocoon until 7 months (she is average size). She now has this which is v PFB but so soft and she obviously recognises it now - if tired will sleep on it immediately. Yy to making something smell like you. I never needed to try this, but another mum once told me that she put rolled up blankets either side of her DS to wodge him in, iyswim, and make him feel really secure. Good luck!