Do you love your husband more or kids more

[mommytobe234]

Just curious to know , plus i am bored. Thanks

Lunatic I am so sorry
My link was to AnxiousAugusta in light of her question and was a silly mash article.
Would not have posted it had I seen yours.
Hugs.

My husband tells me he loves me and DS equally. I tell him I love DS more.

I love my husband, but I couldn't image loving anyone more than DS. Maybe when he isn't so small, cute and cuddly and has left home I might feel differently!

kids, no question of it.

i remember my mum when i was about 9 telling me she'd rescue my dad from a fire before us kids, because she could always have more kids. bizarre!

"My husband tells me he loves me and DS equally. I tell him I love DS more"

how nice of you to tell your husband that

Mrs
I dont find it bizzare though

I love them both in such different ways it's hard to say who I love more, I feel more protective and responsible for the kids so they would come first but i still love DP as much as them.

My gran once told me that once your kids have gone to have their own lives you have your partner left so remember that when your love for your child consumes your life when they are little you need to keep your partner up there too. I try to remember that

Flossy
How did your husband react after hearing your confession ?

AnxiousAugusta- lighten up. I'm sure her DH isn't that sensitive.

Lola

I agree with you completely .your grandma was a wise woman.

well you might want to not share those views with your small children as it doesn't do much for parent child relations, in my experience

I love my dh very much - certainly as much as anyone else loves their partner. I count myself lucky everyday that I have him.

However, my love for my children is almost animalistic. I'd do anything for them. I love them totally unconditionally. I wouldn't say my love for dh is totally unconditional.

If I could save my kids or my dh I would definitely save the kids and I would expect dh to save them over me.

It's different. I adore DS but with both him and my DSSs it's my job to teach them independence and ultimately leave us. I feel they're borrowed. I cherish what I have knowing it keeps changing. We were at a wedding this weekend and DSS1 stayed up dancing while DH took DSS2 and DS to bed. He needed to know I was there but he was off partying. I was so proud but equally missed the little boy who used to need me in close proximity.

DH on the other hand is mine. He is my balance and my partner. We will be together until one of us dies. We've both been married before and we know that we have something special. I know DH will always love me but I'll need to be a great MIL to the boys' future partners to keep their love. My MIL was very silly and basically made DH choose between me and her. I'll never be that stupid.

kiwik
In my case , dog definately

Bingo

Ds most definitely. If dp left me or died, i would be devastated but in time i would move on. I don't think i would ever move on from the death if my child.

My dd - dp would say the same and be shocked if I said him

Well, you might not have your partner left. You might have gone off them. They might have become frightfully boring. You might quite reasonably come to the conclusion that they have been a great co-parent but now you want to move on. The thing about adult relationships is that we can make decisions - we are not mindlessly welded to that other person (as the fact that four in 10 marriages end in divorce demonstrates). The thing about parenthood is that you are mindlessly welded to that other person.

As lots of people said, it's a very different love. My love for DH is conditional - it's conditional on him keeping the promises he made to me to forsake all others, for example. My love for my DCs is not conditional. But I do recognise that DH and I will, hopefully, be together for years after the DCs have left home and made their own families.

I remember watching some disaster movie one night ('The Happening', if it's important ) and one of the main characters leaves his daughter with someone else to go and try to rescue his wife. DH said to me 'Sorry love, but if that ever happens to us, you're on your own. I'm staying with the children to protect and look after them. You're a grown woman, I just don't get this leaving to children to try and rescue another adult.' And I understood that perfectly

Don't see why I have to choose: nobody asks me whether I would save dd or ds in a fire.

The answer would always be that I would save the one who needed saving and ask the others to make their own way out.

I love them all, each in a special unique way. But would protect whoever needed protecting at the time, and it's unlikely that that would always be the same person.

Oh my God my children without a second doubt.

And DH feels the same. It's how it should be. IMO anyway.

DH and I have a strong bond and love which has grown and evolved. Our love for one another relies on our mutual respect for one other. It's not quite earnt, bit it could certainly be unearnt.

My DCs on the other hand don't have to do anything to earn my love. And nothing they could ever do would stop me living them so wholly and completely with every fibre of my body.

Plus, I am constantly wiping my DCs dirty backsides without so much as a flinch. Thinking of doing the same for DH makes me want to chuck!! (surely that's real love?!)

saw a thread like this in AIBU once. It didn't end well.

Oh dear - so many typos!!!! Hopefully you get the drift!

I love them equally, but differently.

I don't think I'd like my children to consider being 'favourites', I like the fact that we all adore each other as family.

I don't love anyone in the same way - so it can't be measured.

I even tell my kids I love them differently to each other - in a unique way from each other. Not better or worse - just differently! My mum told me this and I loved it. I am in no way jealous of any of my siblings and wasn't growing up - as we knew we were unique. In fact, i don't really feel jealous as I know nothing in life is really and truly comparable. i think its to do with feeling uniquely loved. What a wonderful thing for a young child to feel.

I'd hate if love were something you could measure - like in jug.

However, I simply wouldn't want to live without my kids