Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

Parenting

For free parenting resources please check out the Early Years Alliance's Family Corner.

See all MNHQ comments on this thread

Flip

1 2 3 4

Original poster

Is it ok to leave my baby in the flat alone?

87 replies

frissonpink · 23/07/2013 19:16

Context -

Top floor flat (3 floors up) No lift.

Car is parked someway across the communal car park - space is not right by the back door.

I'm really struggling in this heat recently. Pram has to live in the car because there is a. no space in the flat and b. I can't carry it up 3 flights. The pram is hot to the touch in this weather, as the inside of the car is 45 degrees+. Normally, I leave any shopping I have bought in the car and other half brings it in later.

I reackon it would take approx 5 mins to go and get the stuff, leaving baby in the flat. I wouldn't be able to hear her at all, so not the same as going to the car on a driveway and leaving your front door open.

My mother says I'm being completely paranoid and ridiculous.

Yesterday I struggled with an 18lb baby, a heavy change bag (because I put some of the shopping in it!) and x2 carrier bags. It was 34 degrees and I was literally melting with sweat by the time I got into the flat.

Suggestions anyone?

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

LittleBallOfFur · 23/07/2013 19:45

3rd floor flat here too with no lift! Agree with sling although you're still limited with how much you can carry/trips, online delivery (waitrose lovely, I've also had hassle with sainsburys, apparently they're not allowed to carry up flight of stairs for health and safety reasons...).

I also sometimes carried everything into hallway, then took baby up and put somewhere safe before rushing down to get shopping.

maja00 · 23/07/2013 19:48

I always had shopping delivered when I lived in a 2nd floor flat btw - especially when pregnant or with a baby.

PurplePidjin · 23/07/2013 19:52

I got a sling for exactly this reason - 8mo ds is so happy up there on my back, I've converted almost my entire bf group

Google your local sling meet and consultant to find one that suits you :)

Interested in this thread?

Then you might like threads about these subjects:

Families General parenting

FishfingersAreOK · 23/07/2013 19:59

If you are not a fan of slings (I wasn't) maybe try one of the backpack/rucksack carriers - I got on much better with that with my DC. You transfer from car-seat to rucksack and then can make as many trips up and down as you need.

Also maybe try Ocado if deliver to your area - they are always far, far less arsy than Tescos or Sainsburys delivery drivers in my experience.

somedayillbesaturdaynite · 23/07/2013 20:20

FYI digital monitors have a fab reception & range for using over a distance. Agree though that the best option is delivery or just taking up the perishables in a rucksack (or long handled blue ikea bag) which would me a much cheaper option than a good sling.

mrsminiverscharlady · 23/07/2013 20:23

I think the risk of dropping the baby, or falling down the stairs with her, whilst lugging everything up outweighs the miniscule risks (of what?) by leaving her in the flat for 5 minutes.

PolyesterBride · 23/07/2013 20:29

Ocado! They are brill. Also baby monitor outside - ours works at the bottom of the garden so would prob be ok. I wouldn't bother with a sling just for this but then I would probably leave baby if its just for a couple of minutes. Isn't it similar to going for a shower?

ilovepicnmix · 23/07/2013 20:34

I have a similar situation. I pull car up to front door and leave my shopping at the bottom of the stairs. I then park the car and carry baby and some shopping up the stairs. I then leg it down and get the rest if the shopping leaving the baby in the flat alone. He is fine for the minute that it takes me.

peggyundercrackers · 23/07/2013 20:34

i would leave baby in the flat in a cot or playpen for 5 mins, its no different to going in the shower and leaving them in cot/playpen for 5 mins.

KFFOREVER · 23/07/2013 20:38

OP im in a similar situation to you. I take ds upstairs and wait til he naps while i get the shopping from the car.

NomDeClavier · 23/07/2013 20:40

I cope(d) by:
child in ergo on back
child confined to cot or playpen with monitor (have been known to drop stuff and leg it to find out cause of screaming) while gritting teeth and realising it is an absolute necessity
doing a relay with child in pram by back door for some of it (including up one flight) and then taking child up and bringing the shopping the rest of the way

Original poster

frissonpink · 23/07/2013 20:42

mrsminiverscharlady that's a really good point.

I worry about tripping at the best of times!

Possibly I do need to chill out a little and just make sure I'm efficient and not faffing about when I go to the car.

Have complained to both Sainsburys and Tesco. Made zero difference. Best bit - even the arsy delivery driver told me to go ahead and complain that he was a knob, because the drivers constantly complain about having to deliver to flats with no lifts and their managers don't even listen to them

The bit I don't get - surely it's quite common for ppl in flats to want delivery because it is bloody hard work to get the shopping up there!

OP posts:

forevergreek · 23/07/2013 20:44

Beco gemini sling- at 8 months she can go on you back on in/ or front still ( we can still use for eldest at 3 1/2 so well worth it)

Ocado or Waitrose will deliver no problem, we are also top floor and they usually get lost for 15 mins finding flat but no complaints.

We actually love our top floor (5th) flat ( with lift though), and have no reason to move yet even with now x2 toddlers.

lots33 · 23/07/2013 20:46

I wouldn't leave her. I live on a busy road with often no parking near so have similar issues. When I shop, I pack all perishable s in one bag, get dd out and place in sling - boba 3g, put change bag on ( backpack) get toddler out and bag of perishable s leaving the rest of the shopping for when dp gets home.....I feel safer that way.

Good luck!

MummyDuckAndDuckling · 23/07/2013 20:47

When my dd was younger I would take her up to house, pop her in cot with few toys then go back down for the shopping. No harm done!

Now that's she's older and in a bed, if I have anything left in the car, I wait till she is sleeping then go down for it

MrsCosmopilite · 23/07/2013 20:51

I'm on the first floor (bad enough) and when DD was small I'd pull up across the front of the property, get all the bags out by the front door/into the hall then move the car & baby. Then carry her up to the cot/playpen, THEN come back for the shopping.

More recently I've done online shopping with Waitrose. They are quite happy to carry bags upstairs, offered to unpack and will take bags away at the end!

However, DD is now two, so we don't have quite the same problems, other than lugging everything upstairs.

JassyRadlett · 23/07/2013 20:51

I used to do what LittleBall said - dump shopping just inside front door, take baby and pram round to car, put pram in boot, take baby upstairs, take shopping upstairs. Felt like a decent compromise to me.

doublecakeplease · 23/07/2013 20:54

Definitely a backpack for perishables. Could you do a click and collect shop for DH to pick up on his way home??

Abra1d · 23/07/2013 20:57

I'd leave the baby in the flat for five minutes. In these circumstances. But it depends on so many things: where you live, what the other people in the flats are like, etc.

Gooseysgirl · 23/07/2013 21:02

Exact same situation as you OP, although sometimes I get lucky and get parking near the rear door of the building. I'm fairly sure Sainsbos say on their website they will only go up one flight of stairs with a delivery, in the two occasions we used them they took our shopping to the first floor and then we had to take the it up to the next floor... Needless to say we don't get deliveries from them anymore. We have found Tescos fine, we've had many delivery chaps and they have never complained about the two flights of stairs. Our baby monitor has a good range on it so when DD would nap I would quickly hang out washing/collect stuff from car. I also used a sling, BabyBjorn up until 6 months (I know it gets bad press on here but DD and I loved it) then a Boba 3G sling when she was older. When I'm disorganised and haven't done the online shop I leave all the heavy and perishable stuff in the car for DH to carry up later, and carry in the fridge/freezer stuff myself. I use the travel cot as a storage space for DDs toys in our living room and if I need to do a second trip to the bottom of the stairs I leave her there for the two mins it takes to run down and back up again. Expecting DC2 later this year and starting to think about moving if we can in the next year as it'll be a whole other story managing two kids...

Ragusa · 23/07/2013 21:03

Do you have a neighbour you trust and who could just come in for 5 minutes while you unloaded the car?

I was going to say yes, just pop her in the cot, but the thing about her leg getting stuck makes me a bit more on the fence.

MIL used to leave DH sleeping in his cot and pop down to the corner shop - the mind boggles. thinking on safety has changed a great deal thank god

TheBakeryQueen · 23/07/2013 21:09

Please don't leave her! You just never know what might happen to you while you're walking across the car park. If something happened to you, who would know there was a baby in the flat on their own?

The risk may be tiny but it's not worth any risk.

I'd try & rope someone in to help you do the shop or meet you to help carry the stuff up. Or just make lots of journeys with baby in a sling.

DontstepontheMomeRaths · 23/07/2013 21:11

I live in a third floor flat. I'm afraid as a lone parent, I either waited until they were asleep in bed and legged it down and up again, or if it was crucial, I'd either have them in a sling on me and do it or pop them in the play pen (which had netted sides), pop CBeebies on and go in and out fast.

The latter was a last resort tbh.

Keeps you fit being 3rd floor doesn't it?

I'm still here but they're now age 4 & 5, I have all sorts of strange techniques that I still use, to bring things in from the car and keep them safe/ out of mischief.

WifeofGru · 23/07/2013 21:14

When we lived in a flat in the city I often had to park a considerable distance up the street or around the corner. Smart packing at the supermarket helps...... all fridge items together. I would then only carry those inside and get the rest later once DH home. With the exception of milk, most food that requires refrigeration is not too heavy or bulky.

valiumredhead · 23/07/2013 21:18

I'd leave her in her cot, we used to do the same.

Flip

1 2 3 4