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Parenting

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Original poster

How long do you think you can leave your childen for to go on holiday.......

73 replies

fairyfly · 14/05/2006 11:23

Before it becomes damaging?

A weekend,week, fortnight, month?

What are the consequences of leaving them? How does it effect them pyschologically in the long run?

I understand that many parents wouldn't even consider this from the basis they would miss the child. I want to discuss more what the child goes through, how it reacts and what is a safe amount of time to keep them settled secure and happy.

Obviously age and where they will stay has huge bearing on this.

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

cod · 14/05/2006 12:34

thin k yours are deffo old enought ff

jamsam · 14/05/2006 12:40

i recently went to new york for a week and left the ds's at home with grandma and auntie, but apparently all auntie did was complain about the state of the flat/garden etc...it woul dhave been easier on grandma for her to have had them on her own, i was dreading it but as i was with a college group and there were 30 other paranoid mums i didnt feel to bad...i did buy lots of ridiculous pressies to make up for it..

nothercules · 14/05/2006 12:41

I think at at 5 and 7 they are old enough for you to go away. Under 5 it's different.
I should imagine that they will grow up with a wonderful memory of time spent with your parents and after all they are the grandparents.

I never spent any time with any grandparents when I was growing up and its too late now. i'd love to have a memory of a day spent with one of them never mind 10 days.

Go for it, enjoy it and so will your kids.

Interested in this thread?

Then you might like threads about these subjects:

Families General parenting

compo · 14/05/2006 12:43

think 10 days is too long. Think 5 days is much better

compo · 14/05/2006 12:44

also how old would the people be looking after them? I know my parents wouldn't be up for that log a time

Original poster

fairyfly · 14/05/2006 12:48

60ish.

They adore having them, they are easy kids, infact they ring up and ask if they can have them to stay all the time.

I'm confused now. I think they would be fine knowing their characters. Also they are incredibly close to my parents so in a way it would just be like leaving them with a father if he was still around.

I just dont want to get bitten on the bum in years to come when they smoke a crack pipe and blame me of abandonment.

OP posts:

Northerner · 14/05/2006 12:49

Lol at smoking crack pipe!!!

compo · 14/05/2006 12:49

how long have you left them before? If you've already left them for a week and they were fine then maybe 10 days won't be too big a deal

TambaTheDragonSlayer · 14/05/2006 13:38

I left my boys when they were 3 and 1 for 4 nights last year. I missed them loads though and they but they seemed fine with it as daddy was still there and I spoke to them on the phone every night. Id do it again! It was great to have the break and I really needed it as I was ill.

SaintGeorge · 14/05/2006 13:46

That trip must have cost you a fortune in text messages Tamba.

It did do you the world of good though

TambaTheDragonSlayer · 14/05/2006 14:31

You are an amazing person SG and I can never thank you enough for what you did for me. I miss you.

SaintGeorge · 14/05/2006 14:33

Snort. Stop it, mum did far more for you than I did.

You know where I am.

MamaMaiasaura · 14/05/2006 14:34

16 years long enough? jk

Wembley · 14/05/2006 14:35

I left my 2 and a half year old with my parents while I moved house last year. Kept my 5 week old baby with me (bf and all that). I tore me apart. Have never driven with such a passion on the day I was going to get her. Just talking about her made my eyes well up. She had a great tiem but mum said she was waiting for me to arrive all day on the last day. Couldn't leave them to go on holiday, not just yet.

compo · 14/05/2006 14:38

Leaving them with dh for that long wouldn't worry me at all though - it's just that both sets of grandparents live far away and don't look after ds on his own at all, sadly. Now if they ived nearer it would be a different matter entirely!!

PandaG · 14/05/2006 14:39

Regularly leave mine for a week at a time at my P's. They live 3 hrs away so don't see them often, so have them nearly all half terms, and part of longer hol's. Started doing this when DS was 3 and DD 1. Children can't wait to go, and P's can't wait to have them. I enjoy the break - we usually go away for a few days once in the year, but most of the time are busy doing jobs at home - but miss them terribly, they are far too busy having a good time to miss me!

lou33 · 14/05/2006 14:49

mine are 14, 9, 7, 5, i go away for a month and they are fine

Greensleeves · 14/05/2006 14:52

Mine are 3.6 and 19mo - have never left them, apart from three occasions when I have gone out for a meal/to see a film with dh after they were in bed

But I do think that's a bit pathetic. Wouldn't consider leaving them overnight until they are a lot older though

cod · 14/05/2006 14:54

thats is very pathetic greeny

Wembley · 14/05/2006 14:55

Is that because there is no -one nearby you could trust them with? Or because you just don't feel up to leaving them yet?

Greensleeves · 14/05/2006 15:00

I know it is

Greensleeves · 14/05/2006 15:01

I hate being without them. I am jealous and overprotective. Simple as that

JoolsToo · 14/05/2006 15:01

I HAD to leave dd for a week when I went in hossie to have ds1 - that's how it was then.

Don't think there's been any lasting damage.

JoolsToo · 14/05/2006 15:01

she was a week shy of her 2nd birthday btw

Bugsy2 · 14/05/2006 15:10

ex-H took mine away for 10 days last year during the summer hols & will do the same this year. I missed them but made the most of their absence to do lots of grown up norty things!!!
I think children are probably damaged by being unloved more than being left occasionally.

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