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Further freakingly fantabulous adventures of the 40+ Mummies

999 replies

10000Fireflies · 17/01/2013 20:13

For gorgeous, frolicking and fabulous 40-somethings to share the joys of becoming a Mummy, just a little bit later than most!! Grin. Park your zimmer-frame next to your baby buggy, put your feet up, and come and join us in the snug.

OP posts:
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scarecrow22 · 25/01/2013 20:54

BadMiss, reading more suggestions about tribunal, have you contacted the Citizens Advice Bureau about it? They should defo help, no?

BBM, sorry about DP. Sure he is not always difficult, but I have found in the past that being married at a difficult time can be one of the loneliest feelings, especially as perhaps like me you worry about explaining things to family and close friends for fear of turning them against him? I know this can be hard, esp when you are lonely and tired at times, but I really found a combination of being much firmer/stronger but also reassuring was needed. I found as maternity leave wore on though DH was brilliant with DD, he got more and more disinterested in me or what I had to say (sadly not entirely ever that interested in me, tbh, but we have a good relationship in other ways) and very lazy around house: I made a point of saying that I understood he was working hard but I was too, however the key point was that as soon as I went back to work I expected him to take on half of all domestic work (it took a while and some further 'chats' but we kind of got there); and also that the reason I regretted him not making time to spend with me etc was because though I loved Lucy I still loved him and enjoyed adult company in the evening, etc.. It's a bit like having another child, the cliche is true, but worth a try? Forgive me if you know all this- you are also experienced - but DH and I went through a much much more terrible patch before I was pg and what I learned from that, and the fact I survived it at all, made me wiser and also determined to make all that effort/hurt worthwhile for the longterm. Anyway, if nothing else, I feel for you, but cannot believe somebody as warm, interesting and witty as you will not hold huge appeal to DP deep down - which is why I wonder about his own insecurities etc.? Fatherhood can be very scary for me viz responsiblity, losing partner, trappedness.... I even wonder if your stay in Paris made him lonely or something? I'll shut up now, but big hugs (and frankly any man who does not fall at your feet for pistachio and honey cake needs his head seen to ;)) )

Goat, hope you get good sleep soon. What systems have you read up on/tried with BG? Has he always been thus? Having had DD regress to two to four waking a night over Christmas/new year (about a month plus :( ) I now remember just who totally awful and truly torturing it can be. Do ask for help if you need it - nobody can cope with that kind of sleep loss, esp if you are doing any BF.

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scarecrow22 · 25/01/2013 20:56

oops. I guess one day I was going to forget to write DD. Ah well, no harm done. It is the 8th most popular name :)

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bytheseaside · 25/01/2013 21:05

goat poor thing. hopefully you are in bed already? we are also rocking a rainforest theme with babygym - which slightly freaks her out! the looming giraffe slightly freaks me out too on a bad day ... we should have prob gone for consistent theme rather than a jumble of different plastic colours for each outlandishly large baby item. thank goodness for tasteful 'walnut' baby bouncer

scarecrow hi whens due date now? have fallen so behind with other thread

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blueblackdye · 25/01/2013 23:26

Ladies, we need to cheer us up (she says while BF for 2 hours now....) you have to watch this video on YouTube, can't make link, search "Thalasso bain Bebe sonia rochel"
Hope Eagle is cuddling her baby now. Have not heard from her but I can feel that her absence is good news.
Scarecrow, thank you so much for sharing, you made me think, will work on it, we are off next week in a childfriendly resort, it will give us a chance to chat.
Night night

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Kathy420 · 25/01/2013 23:29

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blueblackdye · 25/01/2013 23:42

Riverside has wonderful news ! I leave it to her to relate her journey when she is ready. But could not resist ....
Kathy, excuse me ? is this the British sense of humour ? You could have saved yourself some precious time by not reading this thread.

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scarecrow22 · 26/01/2013 08:28

Can't help but be curious: what did Kathy say?! In summary. Obvs not pleasant. I feel sorry for people who can't join in the spirit of such threads: life must be lonely.
Happy (sleep-full) weekends x
PS Seaside am 28 wks on Mon, prob CS c 15/4

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GoatBongosAnonymous · 26/01/2013 08:38

I'll pm you scarecrow, don't want to give him publicity...

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littleredmonkey · 26/01/2013 08:55

Hi gang.
Sorry missing in action again. Been a bit lazy. Have read up to date.
Goat. How you doing. Hope u r still in bed
Bythesea. Wink wink waitrose haha
Bhb. Hubby naughty but good mummy. My partner use to drive me nuts when we first lived together he was so messy. One day off from work I tidied the flat so spotless then went to work Saturday and returned to a bomb site. Well I was pissed so I tidied all my side of the bedroom. Made my side of the bed. Vac my side of the bedroom. When he came home he clearly saw the point I was making. Harder then you think to make half a bed.

Badmiss so sorry to hear what's happening echo others citizens advice and solicitor need to get ass into gear. Try and relax honey easier said then done I can imagine. Thinking of you

What did this Kathy say by the way. So not allowed into our snug
Been a good girl and lost 15 lbs since new years day. Every evening 5-6 exercises. Bloody knackered. I sooooo want a biscuit oh and choc and ice cream oh and what the hell big Mac chips and mcflurry. Ladies any one else.
Bbh. Holiday soon. How exciting. Sunshine here you come.

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littleredmonkey · 26/01/2013 09:01

Badmiss. I think we need a new look snug and I vote your choice what it should look like. ....... Go nuts. Looking forward to joining you all.

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GoatBongosAnonymous · 26/01/2013 09:14

Good morning everyone! I feel so much more bright-eyed and bushy-tailed this morning as we had a much better night, waking up eventually at 8:15. A coffee later and I can face the day! DH is away this weekend, so food is going to be an orgy of olives and tomatoes (he hates olives and is allergic to tomatoes). BG is in his jumperoo looking like all his Christmases have come at once and my back rejoices!
scarecrow re sleep, thing is, we have never had to have a system yet. Until Christmas he was waking 3-4 times to feed, which he needed to do, as his prem tummy couldn't cope with a big enough feed to go longer. Then over New Year he had a massive growth spurt which saw him taking full feeds for the first time, and now he can go 6-7 hours at night. (Still needs one feed in the middle) So I think we are both getting used to his not having to wake so often. He is really doing pretty well on the whole, with the occasional horrendous night, but those are probably to be expected, given the enormous sea change in his development that has happened in the past couple of weeks. He is in his own room at night, weaning, rolling over, nearly crawling, developing much better hand-eye coordination so he can now play with toys a bit... That brain is working so hard that a bit of sleep disturbance is probably not to be wondered at! Plus he went from being a five month old that got the "oh - are you sure?" comment when I said how old he was [bhmm] to being the size of a small six month old.
Sorry, that was a bit of a mummy rant! It's just nice to feel more positive this early in the morning!

bmm hope you are feeling ok this weekend.

bbd not long to that lovely holiday! Hope it helps you all as a family as well as being fun and relaxing.

seaside hope the sleep progress is continuing!

lrm vq ff hello if you are all lurking. Thinking of you all.

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GoatBongosAnonymous · 26/01/2013 09:15

X post with you lrm lovely to see you!

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GoatBongosAnonymous · 26/01/2013 09:19

Ps lrm you are doing so much better than I am, only 9 lb lost and a bit of backsliding in last week. Not a help that buggy fit was cancelled because of freezing temps - couldn't take BG out for an hour in that, given his lung problems. Oh we'll hopefully this week.

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littleredmonkey · 26/01/2013 14:11

Just had carrot cake and two crusty rolls. Naughty naughty. Carbs are lovely. Only once a week. Chilli for tea and some rice. 3 stone wont fall off on its own.
Goat. So exciting to hear baby goats progress. Dylan is four months soon. Does it all come thick and fast nearer 6 months?

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GoatBongosAnonymous · 26/01/2013 14:29

lrm I just had turkey and tamarind curry and garlic naan. Curry good naan not. Remember that BG is prem so doesn't follow any developmental milestones at all. Does his own thing. He is 4 months adjusted, supposedly this developmentally. no one told him. In some things he is catching up on stuff that he should have been doing at 3 months, some stuff he is doing that he shouldn't be able to do until seven months. Go figure. Completely mystified as to where he gets his contrariness from!!

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littleredmonkey · 26/01/2013 16:25

Goat. Bless him either way he is blossoming. Love to hear what baby's r up to.
So ladies whats new that your little. One has starting doing new and exciting these last few weeks. Dylan has found his voice when excited squealing with joy and also grumbling when fed up and the deepest sign when bored to tears.
Saturday is daddy day care day mummy has a bit of a rest. Lazy lunch 45 mins on x trainer and some weights and at this moment sat in a lovely hot badedas bath thinking a toffee crisps would be nice nah what am I saying a giant toblelrone thats more like it. Even shaved my legs best hide the razor dont want him thinking he is in luck later haha. Sorry so vulgar.

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littleredmonkey · 26/01/2013 16:27

Last set of jabs week Tuesday. Is it three lots of needles? He was fine after last two lots anything I should be aware of after these lot

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littleredmonkey · 26/01/2013 16:28

Oh has anyone got the shred it DVD exercise programme at home?
Sorry lots of questions. Still sat in the bath

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littleredmonkey · 26/01/2013 16:31

Goat. Well done on 9lbs. Hard work this exercise stuff. Roll on warner weather. Dp has gym in the garage. Balls to going in there till it's warmer. I had to train in the hall the other night. Garage freezing and baby in front room.

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GoatBongosAnonymous · 26/01/2013 18:36

Yes three lots of jabs, two in one leg, one inthe other. BG did find these ones a bit tough, have calpol at the ready... And BG straight after is good too if you can. BG slept well afterwards though!

Am determined to be svelte and thin when family see me...

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bytheseaside · 26/01/2013 20:04

hello ladies :) mmm curry - did you make it goat? I'm still thinking about Midget 's sachertorte. todays bad food includes cheese on toast, choc cake and toasted hot cross bun. And lots of toast and jam. I think I'm still gaining not losing ... went out for a walk though - and baby seaside mainly slept in pram. No sign of svelte and thin in our house. Even baby seaside is getting chubby cheeks and knees at last, they do look lovely :)
aah baby goat, growing up fast! I also have no idea about what baby s should be doing and when - just try to keep her stimulated with new stuff and assume it will be OK. I haven't really been one much for baby books after I read the baby whisperer which was so annoying and felt all wrong for us so I gave up, so I don't really know what I should be looking for. I think I'm one of those rubbish case study mummies the baby whisperer / supernanny etc etc are sent in to have a jolly good talking to ... I'm the only mum I know who doesn't even try to have a routine with the baby - seems utterly beyond me, so I just go with the flow as much as poss, and don't care if we sleep at all the wrong times. It's sleep! As long as the feeding is going ok, I'm happy - and I also like dressing her up - what a lot of fun.
lrm we have 3rd lot of jabs this week too - but are going to do them singly hopefully spread over a few weeks as she has reacted so badly to the last lots. sounds like Dylan copes a lot better what a clever boy!
Hi to everyone else. VQ and FF - all ok?

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blueblackdye · 26/01/2013 20:15

Well LRM, Anastasia has been waking up randomly during the night, asking for feed, that isnot progress but I hope it won't last and just means that she needs lots of energy for a big big coming step like sitting on her own or rolling back to her original position instead of screaming of frustration :)
She can sit aided by cushions, grabs and puts everything in her mouth, smiles, laughes outloud, talks to herself a lot, rolls over from back to tummy but not the other way round, plays with her feet in her cot, still sucks now and then her fingers or fist but recently, she seems to have a preference for her left big toe !
I am planning to perform on her once a day massage and take my elimination communication to a further stage. Hum hum....
Xxxx

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blueblackdye · 26/01/2013 20:20

And forgot tosay, I will be stuffing myself next week, not good,not good... All the more as made a chocolate cake today (nothing as sumptuousas Midgets sachertorte though) and ate half of it. Naughty me. I am not doing anything to lose weight so I should be careful not to put on too much.

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Midgetm · 26/01/2013 20:31

Just been to a great British bake off cake sale. Baked biscuits for it all day (polenta and orange.) may be sick on my shoes.

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littleredmonkey · 26/01/2013 21:05

Omg you are all very wicked. All this baking you do I am crap and go to marks & spencers for cakes. Home made chocolate cake yummy nearly slipped on the on my drool.

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