Further freakingly fantabulous adventures of the 40+ Mummies

[10000Fireflies]

For gorgeous, frolicking and fabulous 40-somethings to share the joys of becoming a Mummy, just a little bit later than most!! . Park your zimmer-frame next to your baby buggy, put your feet up, and come and join us in the snug.

Ok ladies please explain to me what this centile means. I can't get my head around it. Must be extra thick today. Ps any explanations please as if u are telling a child.
Ps knackered and need chocolate .If I haven't lost 2lbs this week after 4.5 hours of walking. X training and weights this week. No bloody treats in any shape or form I am going to be a mardy ginger lady.

Bbh. Hubby is very naughty undermining you and I would be very pissed off too. If he asks you to do something next time do the complete opposite.

LRM.. Here goes centile according to midget. If you are on the 9th centile 93% of babies are bigger. If you are on the 97th then only 3% are bigger and your baby is bigger than 97% of other babies. Or something like that. Here Endeth the lesson. I've just baked chocolate marmalade tart after seeing it at rick steins this week. I am a bad bad midget

Thank you Ladies. From your comments, I realise I was not over reacting. Eagleray, I will try to think about your interpretation when I am less upset. How is the name choice going ?
Eagle, Goat, the bad mummy episodes have cheered me up, aren't I bad ! We all do stupid things when lack of sleep and tiredness kick in. Don't feel too bad.
Midget, I have to move nearer to you, love your cooking !
Big hugs to all

bbd forget moving nearer midget I think we should move in with her!

Next time we meet up I will bring a selection of baked goods...

midget your maths is shocking! ;-)

seaside interesting about osteopathy. Will investigate.

About the foam things for in the bed to prevent rolling. Great for toddlers in beds but not for crawling babies as they would get over them easy. Got mine from amazon. Blue daisy I think. A word of warning, DD2 got hers out one night and bit little chunks off it. It now resembles a saw and the bedroom looked like it had snowed. I am just grateful she did not choke on it. Little bugger.

J has just slept 10 to 3.15 so I am hopeful things are on the up.

I need to start eating healthier and rejoin the weight loss thread.

VQ is right about my maths, I blame a typo as normally my maths is tip top. VQ I have joined WW and normally I am very good but I just can't find the motivation. Need to get back on it and stop bloody baking.

LRM I will try again. If your baby is on 9th centile 91% of babies are bigger, the rest are smaller. I feel ashamed. And I dreamt about chocolate marmalade tart.

Sorry midget that was very rude of me at the moment I feel all I have to enjoy is food, and very little time to make anything healthy. I also know while I am feeding baby my body will hold on to the blubber. When I stop it will melt away with little effort.

We have started giving J a bottle of formula each day, and at varying times. I would happily swap to ff completely, but will feed as long as I can. He is 4 months old now, so will be weaning in a few weeks so I am almost there. Things will get easier and I will encourage him to have formula from a cup when he can.

VQ is right about the foam thing. It should not be used for babies. For toddlers it is ok. I got Dreamtubes, basically it is a tube you blow for each side of the bed length way and the fitted sheet has 2 zips to keep these tubes in place. VQ, with these there is no risk of chewing nor choking on foam.
I either leave A in her cot or on the floor if I need to get out of the room, to me, it is the only way to prevent falling ! Wth these babies, one never knows when they start rolling back and forth... Now that she can roll from back to tummy, I get frustrated screams saying "Mum, help me to get back on my back, I am stuck"
Made a huge mistake yesterday: instead of taking A with me to pick up her brother at nursery, she usually falls asleep for 30 minutes, I left her at home with my cleaner, of course she did not sleep and was exhausted, she woke up at 9pm, then 10.30 then 11.15 and 4.30am.... Tired baby does not sleep well, lessn learnt !

VQ no offence taken . I also think I need to stop feeding to stop this darn obsession with food.

BBD I also need to get midge to sleep if I am to get a good night. Glad you left A with cleaner, thought at first you just meant you left her and I was a bit .

I add my plea for a good night. At the moment three hours sleep per night counts as a good amount. I thought weaning and ff was supposed to mean I have an angel baby who sleeps all night?? And doesn't spend it hurling himself around the cot (in his sleep) and making himself cry when he cannons into the bars?

noooooo - please tell me the sleeping gets better!! Just up after spending second day in bed - am so over getting up and dressed now.

Midget - re leaving babies home alone, a few years ago when my neighbours had baby DS, they would often just give me the baby monitor to look after, then go to the pub (on the basis that the monitor would work through the wall into their house). Not something I'll be doing..

In France, DD had a 'cale-bebe', literally a band with two foam cylinders that you could set to stop her rolling. Was told to do it by the hospital because her head was a bit squished on one side after the birth...

eagle um, the sleeping gets better?... I think I may just have a particularly recalcitrant sleeper. He makes up for it by being a great eater. I guess.
And did the monitor work through the wall?!!

badmissm if I restrain BG at all he goes completely nuts...

Well I never heard any cries on the monitor but he's a v healthy 8 yr old now...

oops sorry for misinforming about foam bumper things. I've got a lindam bed rail somewhere, but thats prob for older ones too - got it partly for toddlers coming to stay.

Eagle sleep does usually get easier for (most) babies bit by bit so you barely notice! But then there are dreadful weeks / couple of weeks every so on (optimistically known as 'wonder weeks') when all progress goes to sh**. We are having that right now. Baby s is getting stacks of sleep, but mainly in the day, or at night as long as surgically attached to milk supply and has full-scale tantrum if not, so I can't get any sleep grrrr. I think I feel some gentle sleep training coming on - I'm going to have to toughen up as I'm a pushover at the mo. Yep, getting up and dressed is a step too far for me too some days still! pjs that look a bit like clothes is the answer :)

poor goat - 3 hours is truly dreadful! Am reading harvey karp on sleep this week for some ideas to get over the bump - have you seen it? so far main tips seem to be white noise. Well, Ewan never had much effect except on me and dp, so not holding out much hope on that one. And swaddling - which caused her to showcase great escapology talent, and crossness.

midget you make such lovely food - seems a shame to diet ...

Sleep depends on the baby. Both my girls slept through early - 6 and 7 weeks. J, however, does not do sleep particularly well. I have tried to do the same things with him, but he was having none of it.

Loving the pjs/clothes idea Seaside!

I think the freezing weather has driven me to my bed as much as the sleep deprivation has - roll on spring! In fact, I've been rather obsessed with warm weather these last few days and am taking the drastic step of tentatively planning a trip abroad in couple of months time - let's see how far I get with that!

VQ - you are so right about sleep depending on the baby - my mum always said that my sister was the 'bad' one and I was the 'good' one when it came to sleep and crying. Still trying to work out which one I've got - managed to get her off to sleep about 30 mins ago, but only after I let her play with my boobs for ages (she seemed to be fiddling rather than feeding, but whatever it takes...)

As for swaddling Seaside I was convinced Baby E would love it and bought a nice merino one for her before she was born but the road to hell is paved with good intentions and she has angrily wrestled her way out of that one, just like Baby S! Had better luck with the grobag this week as half the waking/crying seems to come from her kicking off blankets then sticking her feet out between the poppers of her babygros.

DP is finding the nights (when he's here) particularly hard - think he needs some sort of plan before the night starts so that he knows what's expected of him during the night, whereas I tend to just pass out as soon as Baby E is asleep, and then just work out what to do when she wakes up next!

Wishing everyone a peaceful night with at least 3 hours of sleep

eaglray going to bed in your actual clothes is also a good plan :) i used to do this in early days if hv coming early and i had noone to help me with baby s. hooray for comfy pg leggings. still wear them most days

ah yes, I recall sleeping in my clothes a couple of times in the early days - thought I was really clever!

Haven't moved out of maternity wear yet - it's all about the stretchy, comfy clothes. Mother has just been on the phone and asked if I have lost any more weight and if my tummy has got smaller she seems to be a bit fixated on my weight as she never stops going on about it!

Meanwhile, DP is studying a Gina Ford book he was given by a colleague to see if he can get Baby Eagle trained up in a military stylee. Oh dear.

:( i don't like gina either. maybe ostentatiously read a gentle alternative ...

up late again. baby seaside asleep in my arms. now all i have to do is transfer her without waking. have fed all evening, really can't face startng yet again, but have a feeling this may take hours

bucks fizz for breakfast in snug tomorrow please

I have opened the bucks fizz for you all. I dont drink but pouring coordinator is my role. Dylan woke every hour last night so feel like crap. Weigh day at the clinic as well so glad to go for a walk. Raining but dont care.
Ladies I have been a good girl and lost 26lbs since new years day. Eagle I did not think weight or diet for three months I hardly had time to put my knickers on. You do it when you are ready no one else. Gina ford is depressing. Makes you think you are doing everything wrong. I threw it away. Go with your heart and soul and common sense honey xxx
Goat and bythesea. Sending the sleep fairy to both your homes. Leave the window open so she can get it in xx

Oh dear Seaside - I hope you managed to salvage some sleep after the feed-a-thon last night.

LRM - well done on the weight loss - that's fantastic! I weighed again today and no change from last time - at least I haven't gained anything...

We had a bit of a day yesterday with Baby E crying all day, and the only thing that would pacify her was noise and a dummy, and even that was short-lived. Then I realised that she had been getting progressively worse over a few days. Rang NHS direct, and one thing led to another and we found ourselves taking her to hospital at midnight. Strangely though, as soon as we set off in the car, she passed out like a light! The doc thought she seemed in good health apart from an inflamed ear, which might be causing her some irritation/pain, so gave me Calpol to give to her. Didn't need it in the end as she slept really well overnight (waking just for feeding then dropping off again) but at least if the problem returns I can do something this time.

DP v depressed about the Gina book - he has realised she would never be able to conform to a strict regime so has given up already. Hurrah.

Baby E is 4 weeks old today and over the last few days she's been making some attempts to smile at me. However, the only time she does this is when I'm changing her! What on earth is going on here? This morning, it was a definite grin - she was lying there, pooey nappy at her feet and her face just lit up. But the rest of the time she doesn't bother to try and smile - has anyone else had this?

Be gads Eagle you are one courageous lady. Many people don't leave the house before 6 weeks, let alone worry about Gina and dieting. Please give yourself some slack. I realise it is tempting to get control back but if you set unrealistic targets you will end up getting run-down, frustrated and possibly down.
Politely tell your mother to not mention your weight - it would be awful if you tried to diet and It affected your milk supply. Tbh if I were you I would eat sensibly - ie some of everything, 3 good meals a day and mix up treats with healthy snacks, drink lots of water and in a few months you'll find you and Baby E are sleeping better, getting out more and either the weight will be coming off gently and surely, or you can think about watching what you eat and your activity if you need.
As for baby books check out a few and then pick the bits that work for you. I did 40pc Baby Whisperer, 10pc Giba and 50pc instinct/trial & error. For example i tried to get DD to go 3 hours between feeds and v slowly stretched that to 4: if she cried I checked nappy, change of scene, maybe a song or two; if she still cried I let her suck my finger in case she wanted a comfort suck (v often case), and if she still cried (not often) I fed her- sod the time police! DD was happier, i was more relaxed, she was more chilled...and so it went around the circle. We had bad days, sure, but my dominant memory was a relaxed baby because I learned to see patterns and warning signs rather than force us both into some artificial routine. One day I found we had a routine -though it always evolves - one we had found ourselves.

Sorry to sound so hideously bossy. I'm sure your mum is lovely and DP's colleague well-meaning (some pple thrive on Gina) - but her questions are v unhelpful, and actually potentially will make things worse.
Plus I feel so hideously giddy I'm barely functioning so not in usual polite mode

Take such good care of you and babyE xx