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Parenting

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Original poster

How old were your dc's when they first slept over at grandparent's?

56 replies

jasmin27 · 02/01/2013 22:39

just that really. My eldest dd is 2.3 doesn't sleep through and comes into our bed during the night. My Mil has mentioned her sleeping over a few times and wanted to take dd for a couple of weeks when ds was born 5 months ago, I said no. But came round the other day saying they have decided that dd should stay over once a week. Dh just said yeah ok, I said no as I don't feel she is ready. Just wanted to know if i'm being overprotective. Then can take her for the day but don't want her to sleep over, but they are always too busy to take her. I wouldn't leave her with my mum either so it's not an in laws thing.

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amck5700 · 02/01/2013 23:28

They never have :( and now age 12 and 11 with a sick elderly grandparent, it never will happen.

They have only ever had my Mum and she has never been able to have them and isn't local anyway.

SocietyClowns · 02/01/2013 23:30

Remember, she is YOUR child and it is YOUR decision were she sleeps. We don't have family near but when visiting my parents at Easter may attempt one night away for our anniversary and leave dd1 (5 1/2) and dd2 (then 3) for the night. That will be the first time.

AfterEightMintyy · 02/01/2013 23:31

Nearly 3 years old for both of them.

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QOD · 02/01/2013 23:33

DD's 14 ...... It's not happened yet!

SPsFanjoHasSatelliteNavigation · 02/01/2013 23:33

2 week old.

Hes 3 and hasn't slept over since

nancy75 · 02/01/2013 23:41

Dd was less than 2 weeks old, my parents only live round the corner and she stays for the night every couple of weeks, when she was 3 she went with them to Spain for a week, I got a few comments about that!

GrumpySod · 03/01/2013 09:58

Never (DC1 is 13). I suppose we thought about it once DC1 was 6yo, no way any earlier but their grandies aren't much involved in DC lives.

LiegeAndLief · 03/01/2013 10:12

Never. Dc are 6 and 3. My parents live overseas and it would be a cold day in hell before I left them with mil for more than 10 min.

CMOTDibbler · 03/01/2013 10:18

DS is 6 and hasn't slept over with any family member - they just aren't interested. He's spent less time on his own with family than with our cleaner (who babysits on the odd occasion), which is sad.

Woodlands · 03/01/2013 10:20

My DS was 2.4. He cried himself to sleep the first night but was fine the next two nights.

Northumberlandlass · 03/01/2013 12:32

DS was about 7 months, was back at work and had stopped EBF. Only at my parents though MiL just isn't interested really - which is a shame, but hey ho.

He is now 9 and probably stays there once/twice a month. My parents love it and I am very grateful of the sleep in's !

teacher123 · 03/01/2013 13:26

DS is 8mo and has stayed over at both sets of parents regularly, with us there. Am now working up to leaving him overnight with inlaws (as they only live 15 minutes away). Mil is desperate to have him, and totally wouldn't mind being woken in the night. When I go back to work there will be some occasions where it makes sense childcare wise for him to stay over there, so would like him to get used to it beforehand.

GaryBuseysTeeth · 03/01/2013 13:31

2 months, he's now one & stays a few nights at PIL every 2-3 months.

The 'they' have decided part would irriate me too, do they know she doesn't sleep through & in their own way are trying to help?
Or just being overbearing?

jellybeans · 03/01/2013 13:37

Only stayed with my own parents and they were about 3-4 years.

RichManPoorManBeggarmanThief · 03/01/2013 13:47

10 months. I went to a wedding and left him overnight. He was fine. I'm not sure he even realised I was missing. Caveat: we'd both been staying with GPs for a week as I live overseas so was back in uk and staying with parents

SleighbellsRingInYourLife · 03/01/2013 13:48

"But came round the other day saying they have decided that dd should stay over once a week."

Tell them they can fuck off with their decisions.

SirDoris · 03/01/2013 13:49

DD is 3.5 and has only stayed at PILs on her own once quite recently.
Before then from about 22mths until DS was born when she was 2.3 we went away for the night 3/4 times and she stayed at our house with a set of grandparents as we felt more comfortable with this and knew she'd be happy with it.

SauvignonBlanche · 03/01/2013 13:51

DS was 9, DD was 6, it was the same night.

StupidFlanders · 03/01/2013 14:01

A couple of weeks.

rrreow · 03/01/2013 14:03

Neither DH or my parents are alive, so the question hasn't come up. But DS sometimes goes over to his aunties' (DHs two sisters) place and although he's not stayed overnight there before (they've not offered and we haven't asked!) I would have been comfortable with that from about 18 months. He's very close to one of his aunties though (she nannies for us so he sees her about 5 days a week) so that helps with the confidence.

ChristmasJubilee · 03/01/2013 14:34

Ds1 was 11 and asked if he could stay with my mother. Ds2 and ds3 have never stayed over. I don't have pil's.

FortyFacedFuckers · 03/01/2013 15:01

DS slept over with my mum last week on his 7th birthday up until then he has never wanted to.

Battlefront · 03/01/2013 15:13

As always, the test for whether this is really an unreasonable suggestion from your MIL 9or if it's a MIL issue) is what would you think if it was your mother?

My parents had mine from very small (6mo?) but Dad was my childminder and I occasionally had to stay away overnight with work. Amazing how you can suddenly become comfortable with something when you need help

I agree they aren't in a position to tell you though and I also wouldn't want to be committed to a regular night.

Tw1nkle · 03/01/2013 19:21

I think my DD was about 2.5.

Once a week sounds crazy!
I'd get round it by saying that if you did that for them, you'd like to do the same with your mom too - and that would be far too much!

It is nice to have a break sometimes. DD has stayed over about 4 times I think, since she was 2.5 - she's 4.2 now! So not many!

catgirl1976geesealaying · 03/01/2013 20:35

About 8 months I think

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