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Parenting

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Original poster

DO TEENAGE AND YOUNG MUMS FIND BEING A MUM HARD??

43 replies

laurenholly · 18/03/2006 23:24

hi i became a mum at the age of 18 and im 22 now and have 2 girls lauren 3 and holly 1
i found being a parent easy but alot of people say its hard work i dont think it is

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joash · 18/03/2006 23:41

Been a long time since I was a young mum, but I also had two girls by the time I was 21 and I also found it easy.

Original poster

laurenholly · 18/03/2006 23:44

how old are your girls now??
i dont find hard at all it easy and i enjoy it alot

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Kidstrack2 · 18/03/2006 23:46

I didn't find it hard, but its different to what i expected, i love having my two so young, i had ds at 17 and dd at 21!

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Original poster

laurenholly · 18/03/2006 23:47

how old are you children now fastrack

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Original poster

laurenholly · 18/03/2006 23:49

opps sorry kidstrack2

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Kidstrack2 · 18/03/2006 23:49

nearly 7 and nearly 3, I'm now 24

Original poster

laurenholly · 18/03/2006 23:50

oh right so still young you having anymore?

OP posts:

joash · 18/03/2006 23:51

Mine are now 25 and 21 (also a DS age 16 and my GS aged 3)

Kidstrack2 · 18/03/2006 23:53

i help set up a teenage parenting group when i was 19 with a local authority, we made a video on teenage pregnancy and we went into schools with it and showed it to 14yr olds, to show them what it was like to have a child at such a young age, we also made up worksheets for them to follow with the video, at the end of the sessions not one 14yr old still wanted a baby at a young age

Kidstrack2 · 18/03/2006 23:55

sorry was going way off there wasn't i, no i'm not having anymore not able to because of a back condition(very sore) and i also had a tummy tuck done 2weeks ago because i had so much sagging skin on my tummy from having the kids.

Tortington · 19/03/2006 00:14

i thought it dreadful - i was 17.

however if i got pregnant now at age 33 i would think it dreadful just the same. some people are just not good at this kind of thing!

happybebe · 19/03/2006 08:27

i was 20 when i had my son (11 months) and will be nearly 22 with my second due in june, i did find it hard at first but adjusted quickly

Mum2OneAndOneMore · 19/03/2006 09:11

I always wanted kids form a young age, had always lovd kids, i decided to wait till the gran old age of 19 to fall pregnant i actually had ds when i was 20 though. I have never ever found it hard i loved it, there has been ups & downs like everything but i have found being a mum the most special & rewarding thing in my life, i am now 24 & also have an 8 week old daughter & i am finding it even easier the 2nd time round.

HappyMumof2 · 19/03/2006 09:54

no, I didn't find it hard. It came naturally to me. I had ds at 19 and had already worked as a nursery nurse before that. When dd was born I was 23 and she has been so easy. I can honestly say I don't find being a mum to two hard at all.

NomDePlume · 19/03/2006 10:07

My situation is a bit different to others in that at 24 and a mum of a 3yr old DD, I'm also a stepmum to 2 teenage boys. I guess I was thrown headlong into parenthood when I met my DH, the boys were 7 & 9, I was just 19. So I was facing parental challenges at least 18 months before DD was born. Looking after DD herself was not difficult, but it was a bit of a challenge trying to include the DSs all the time. DS1 was fine but DS2 felt a little pushed out, so it was really important for us to keep him included and feeling 'part of it', despite the fact that he retreated into himself.

So in answer to your question, I do find parenthood a challenge, but not 'difficult', IYSWIM.

cazH · 19/03/2006 10:18

My son was 15 and his girlfriend 16 when they told us she was pregnant. The decision what to do had to be theirs and they decided to have her. She is now 5 and they had another little girl and a boy over those 5 years. It is undoubtedly harder because most very young parents have little money, can't afford a place of their own and add to that the general stress of parenthood. Some youngsters breeze it some go under. Personally, I think having a routine is the key to being able to cope.

NomDePlume · 19/03/2006 10:27

I had DD in an emotionally and financially secure relationship, which I think makes more of a difference to how easy you find parenting than your age does.

izzybiz · 19/03/2006 10:31

i had my Ds at age 16, i think because i was so very young things that worry me now didnt bother me then. i was so laid back with him, and he was the easiest baby and child you could meet.
im 30 now and have a 22 month old Dd, im totally different with her, and have found her much harder.
it might be because they are just different, but i also think its how you are too.

trinityrocks · 19/03/2006 10:38

doesn't everyone find it hard, mine are 5 yrs and 11 months and I am 28. I find it hard

anniebear · 19/03/2006 12:08

I am sure a lot of it depends on the children

If your baby sleeps and doesn't cry an awful lot of course it will seem easier to car for than the next person who's baby screams for months and doesn't sleep well!!!

A 18 year old may have had lots of experience with kids but a 33 year old may not have

Also its what support you have

Don't think it is particulary what age you are,

muma3 · 19/03/2006 12:21

i had my dd1 at 15 and it was horrific. this was due to being completely alone and living in a drug filled hostel with £15 a week to live on. i got a council flat and things started to get easier. it wasnt looking after a child as much but not having support to face the big bad world and i ended up learning alot the bloody hard way. i am now 24 in july and i am a happy confident mother of 3 and wouldnt have it any other way.

its not the kids that are hard but everthing that you face wth life with a child.
like its not hard when your child is ill - its hard to cope when you are out of control and cant help them etc. iyswim

CaptainDippy · 19/03/2006 12:50

Hi! I am 23 and I have got two DD's aged 2yrs and 10 months (15 month age gap) I know that this isn't as young as some of you (had DD1 when I was 21 and DD2 when I was 22) but I find I have waaaaaay more energy than a lot of my mum friends who are older and I am glad that I chose to have children young (got married at 20, left Uni and DH and I decided to start a family instead of the career thing!) A lot of people think I'm strange choosing to have my children young, but I am so glad I did it. It is very hard work and I get days when I think "why why why!!!?", but when I am thirty, my family will be over and done with (I'd like 4, quite close together) and I can always go back to a career. My degree is not going to expire just cos I spent 10 yrs at home with children. Yey for young mums!!

mrsdil · 20/03/2006 11:44

I had my ds at 21 and found it relatively easy..my sister had twins at 16 though and it was a struggle!

blueshoes · 20/03/2006 11:59

agree with anniebear!

Nikaleeona · 21/03/2006 21:54

I had DD when i was 18. Her Dad then left me 6months ago when she was5months old and i have found things easier since he left! Also DD has been happier since he left and started sleeping through the night! However i have PND but i feel this is due more to the fact that i couldnt breastfeed and issues i have with myself. I am a nursery nurse and have returned to work now and am finding things easier with DD despite running around after other peoples childrens for hours!

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