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Original poster

Do your DC watch tv in their rooms at bedtime and sleep with the light on?

56 replies

AugustMoon · 20/08/2012 22:30

Mine do Sad DH has got them tvs and they watch netflix at night. They are boys, 9 and 5 (way too young IMO). They also sleep with the light on as DH says they're scared of the dark. I feel it's stopping them getting a good night's sleep but if I dim the light he turns it up again saying it's 'dingey' (sp).

OP posts:
OpheliasWeepingWillow · 21/08/2012 06:18

Bloody hell. I'd cut the plugs off the TVs and to hell with the howls of protest, but that's just me.

theredhen · 21/08/2012 07:19

Well each to their own. Ds had a tv in his room from about age 8. But he has always known not to watch it at night without permission, he knows it would be removed!

A night light is a good idea and something else ds still has now.

Does your dp sleep with the light and tv on?

Mama1980 · 21/08/2012 07:23

Neither my son 4 nor dd 14 has a tv in their room. Think it must be effecting their sleep tbh have they a night light?

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cupcake78 · 21/08/2012 07:29

No and it won't be up for discussion until he can read a book well. I had a tv in my room from the age of 10 and didn't read as a result. Had I read more I'd have done a lot better at school. I would also worry what ds was watching.

Itsjustafleshwound · 21/08/2012 07:31

No to TV - we have a tv in our living room and we make a stab at sharing it between what my 7 yo DD, 5 Yo DS and the adults want to watch.

My children go to bed with their bedside lights on (which get switched off later) and some kid music ....

I just don't quite understand how your DH thinks letting children go to bed watching movies is relaxing or conducive to sleep.

fuzzpig · 21/08/2012 07:31

No no no. Agree with you OP. I don't like tvs in bedrooms (even adults!) either, but the light is much worse IMO. Disrupts sleep cycles, or something to do with melatonin or something

I don't see why your DH gets to make this decision without you (even if you are busy with baby) - change it now before they go back to school.

Not sure if you want to go as far as removing the tvs, but with the light issue maybe you could make a treat of them choosing a nice nightlight?

fuzzpig · 21/08/2012 07:35

You could show him this (though I'm sure there's better more scientific articles out there, I'm crap at googling)

Haemadoots · 21/08/2012 07:40

My dc have a tv on for a short while they don't have any sleep issues at all, dc1 is an excellent reader and often chooses to read instead, they don't have a light on though. I sleep with a bedside light on when dh is working away, I went through a traumatic burglary when I was a child and the house was being observed and they broke in when the light went off so this is my issue really.

lc200 · 21/08/2012 07:45

Lol overthemill. If we had that rule, we could have a tv in our room, but only dh would be allowed to watch it!

overthemill · 21/08/2012 08:02

lc200 haha well we thought we should all abide by the same rule. It was only at about 15 that the eldest one twigged hmm and we have since stated that three As at A level doesn't count, nor a first at university

BikeMedalsRunningMedals · 21/08/2012 08:29

DS has slept with the side light in for a few months, since he 'fell' (unofficially, was pushed by evil little toerag) down some (17) stairs at a playgroup and lost all his confidence about everything. He is 4 in a couple of weeks and I am trying to wean him off it by then, with lots of 'big boys are brave....' I turn the light off once he is asleep, he doesn't have difficulty falling asleep.

TheGashlycrumbTinies · 21/08/2012 08:38

No TVs in bedrooms here for 6 and 9 year old, no TVs in bedrooms at all. We do leave a little lamp on in one of the spare rooms to shine some light on the landing if they need the loo in the night.

Gingersnap88 · 21/08/2012 08:43

Absolutely not. I had a tv in my room when I was young and I used to stay up all night watching things far far too old for me! Anyway, tv before bed isn't good as it over stimulates the brain.

As for the lights, could they not have night lights instead? Ikea do great ones. Sleeping with the lights on is daft.

lljkk · 21/08/2012 08:44

this is not how I want to raise my kids but I feel o have no say in it.

That's the real problem.

Physiologically it's better not to watch TV right up to falling asleep, or to sleep in bright light. Not so good for brains or health. Not optimal for adults or children. You can google refs for that. A little bit of background noise may be ok (like radio on).

DS hosted sleepover the other night & we found the (8yo) guest child expected bed time hot choc, video & light on! Fairly difficult to accommodate since mine won't conk out without quiet & darkness. And any food/drink after 8pm tends to keep them awake so is banned. We sort of made it all work in the end.

GooseyLoosey · 21/08/2012 08:47

No TVs. Ds (9) says that he can't sleep in the dark so we leave the hall light on until we go to bed.

PigeonPie · 21/08/2012 08:48

Sue Palmer, in her book Toxic Childhood, talks about 'the Monsters in the Bedroom' (page 92 in my copy) about how to settle your child if they are frightened of monsters / scared of the dark etc but also gives the evidence against having televisions and electronic equipment in the bedroom. It's an excellent book and may give you the ammunition you need to get this changed.

She has also written a follow-up book to this called Detoxing Childhood and her latest book is called 21st Century Boys about bringing up boys in this new Information Age.

All worth a read. Good luck!

Margerykemp · 22/08/2012 16:46

No one's going to come onto this thread and say they disagree though are they?

I NEED the tv on to go to sleep so I'd feel like a hypocrite if I banned a tv set from DC's room. When they didn't have it the living room became 'theirs' , dominated by CBC and I ended up living hiding in my bedroom.

But it is only DVD enabled- I wouldn't want them exposed to late night tv.

toxicsue · 22/08/2012 23:40

There are lots of things that are OK for adults but not for children. Do you feel like a hypocrite when you refuse to let your DC drive the car, operate the cooker or knock back red wine? OK, your generation developed a few bad habits (watching TV till late into the night being one of them). You don't have to pass them on to your children, especially now there's a ton of scientific research showing that it doesn't do us any good in the long run!

janji · 23/08/2012 00:35

Both dc (6 & 8) have the little plug in night lights. Both have TVA and DVD players but are restricted as to when they are allowed to use them.

liverLadyLass · 23/08/2012 01:42

ds eight, has own tv, watches till 10pm then lights and tv goes off, not my choice either, hubby thinks going to bed at nine is too early as he thinks ds will not be able to sleep,,,,
dd three, same thing but a bit earlier sometimes,,
winds me up, I feel they should be both in bed with tv off by nine for a good nights sleep, for school etc,,
hubby disagrees, so trying it for a while to see how it goes

theredhen · 23/08/2012 07:27

My 8 yr old was on bed asleep by 7pm, 10pm seems really late for an 8yr old!

Original poster
AugustMoon · 23/08/2012 13:32

ladylass that sounds similar to my situation. I've put my foot down a bit - offering a choice ie - one programme each in the morning then if they want to watch sthg later I've been saying 'you can watch this now or watch sthg in your room before bed' and it seems to be working - they're choosing 'watch this now' over watching tv in their rooms so have had 2 nights with no tvs on upstairs! DH has gone along with it.

OP posts:
BornToFolk · 23/08/2012 13:51

No TV in DS's room, none in mine either. I may let him have a TV at some point but not for a looooong time yet (he's nearly 5). Until recently, he had stories or music on while he fell asleep but he's not asked for that for a few weeks now. I thought he'd got so used to it he wouldn't be able to sleep without it but he's fine.
Landing light is left on, door ajar. I turn the light off when I come up to bed. He has a torch by his bed in case he wakes in the night when it's properly dark and is scared.

You do have a say in it OP. Can you use the start of the new term as a reason to change things? i.e. a later bedtime and TV before bed is a holiday treat but during term it's bed at a reasonable time and lights off (or at least dimmed) to sleep.

lovechoc · 23/08/2012 14:14

We do not have a TV in our bedroom (but do have one if we really wanted it, sitting in a cupboard somewhere in the house) and neither do either of the DC. I don't feel it's necessary, tbh. There's one downstairs we can all watch together but even then it's rationed. No lights on for either of mine (5yo and 2yo) at night at bedtime.

OP I think you may need to put your foot down and say you are not happy with how things are turning out. At least start with removing TVs would be my advice. Hope you can resolve this soon.

YBR · 23/08/2012 14:24

OP, could this be more about your DH having had a fear of the dark?

If your DCs go away (e.g. with school) they will be expected to sleep in the dark with everyone else, so I would get them used to it. Children can be cruel and taunt anyone whe's different. If, as you imply, there's a dimmer switch you can train them (and DH) gradually.

Do you and DH have a TV in your bedroom? If not why do they?
I would want to keep track of what they're watching as there is a lot of unsuitable stuff out there.