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Parenting

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Original poster

why is she doing thos???!!!!!!

31 replies

Alabama100 · 30/07/2012 04:36

Anyone doing or have done cc or pu/pd. I do a combination of the 2 and its always worked got dd to sleep 10A-12 hours. She's now been SCREAMING since 3.30am for over an hour so far. I've changed her nappy, given water, teething gel, cuddled her everything.

Why is nothing working?????

Please some one help I have been shouting screaming and crying myself and getting worried!! Please help me nothing I working!! She just keeps standing in her cot and is HYSTERICAL!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Original poster

Alabama100 · 30/07/2012 04:40

She's made herself sick from screaming!!! I haves cuddled her for 20 mins - hysterics. She's now screaming hysterically in her cot for the past 15 mins solid.

I have no clue how to fix this the neighbours are getting angry she's hysterical I'm now hysterical myself! NOTHING IS WORKING!!!!

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Suntime · 30/07/2012 04:48

How old is she? Does she have a temperature? Could she be too hot or cold, having a bad dream? Maybe she is unwell? My son was up all night recently and when I took him to the Dr the next day it turned out to be an ear infection. I'd cuddle her and then see your Dr in the morning. .

Original poster

Alabama100 · 30/07/2012 05:06

Just given 200mls milk she fell asleep as soon as I put her in her cot full on hysterics. I put her down awake hysterics, asleep hysterics.

Been up since 3.30am is now 5am and I am not exaggerating she has been screaming non stop. Have nothing left to try.

Co sleepibg is not an option as she crawls off the bed and smacks her face on the wooden floor.

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Original poster

Alabama100 · 30/07/2012 05:07

8.5 months old. Checking temp now....

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Grumpla · 30/07/2012 05:07

If you are shouting, screaming and crying then you need to calm down before you can calm her down!

Take a minute or two outside the room, take some deep breaths, have a glass of water / wash your face and remind yourself that you are the adult here. If you've recently made a change (started CC?) then she's probably freaking out / feeling scared. I didn't do CC but DS sometimes gets in a tizz like this when poorly / stressed / big changes.

Then go in and give her a cuddle, change her nappy, walk her round the house for a bit. Anything to "re-set" her from this crying jag. Try and keep your voice calm and your body relaxed as you hold her. Get a cuddly toy out? Go into a different room? If you're at the point where you are both in hysterics your aim should be to get you both feeling in control now.

If you feel like you are about to lose control and scream at, hit or shake her then the best thing to do is make sure she is safe in her cot and walk away.

Don't be worrying about the neighbours. Everyone has nights like this occasionally, that's part of having children! You clearly aren't doing it on purpose and neither is she.

Good luck, hope you get some sleep soon.

Original poster

Alabama100 · 30/07/2012 05:09

Temp is 37.6 slightly elevated probably from screaming for 1.5 hrs hysterically nonstop.

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Original poster

Alabama100 · 30/07/2012 05:13

Have been doing cc successfully since 6.5 months and since day 3 haven't had to use it as fell asleep and stayed asleep.

If she was unwell why would she fall asleep when I hold her? I've bought her in bed and am going to sit up for the rest of the night/morning now. My day has started at 3.30am. She's thrashing around in hysterics.

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GnocchiNineDoors · 30/07/2012 05:14

Do you have an OH / DP? If so, they need to step.in for a bit while.you get yourself.calm.

Original poster

Alabama100 · 30/07/2012 05:19

Am still sobbing. She won't go to sleep!! I have literally tried EVERYTHING! changing her nappy, water, mik, cuddles, leaving her to cry, walking around with her.
I actually can't bare looking at her right now I am so sleep deprived and after 2 months of great solid sleep I can't go back to how terrible things used to be - I was on the verge of depression from dd waking every 45 mins. I can't go back to that!!!!!!!

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Grumpla · 30/07/2012 05:20

If she's unwell all the more reason that she needs a cuddle from you! Remember she is still a very little baby - very few babies sleep through from 3 months! Mine didn't even at 8 months. If she is poorly then you are probably the only thing in the world that can make her feel better. Try and stay calm, sing to her, cuddle her. If she is poorly you should be able to nap later (mine always sleep loads when ill)

Have you offered milk? If she's doing through a growth spurt she may need an extra feed. Even if you offered it to her before and she didn't want it, worth trying again.

Have a drink / snack yourself as well. Early starts and stress are not good on an empty stomach!

Original poster

Alabama100 · 30/07/2012 05:20

Oh shouted at me that he needs his sleep and is refusing to help in any waydespite me begging and pleading.

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Stonefield · 30/07/2012 05:23

She is probably cutting a tooth. Is she properly awake? If she isn't, wake her up and then offer lots of reassurance and cuddles. You are going to have to just accept that you have had an early start and move on. It's not the end of the world, you can sleep later when she naps.

Original poster

Alabama100 · 30/07/2012 05:24

But I am cuddling her! I cuddled her for 20 mins she calls down then as soon as she's in her cot hystrics. She hasn't done this in 2 months!

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Original poster

Alabama100 · 30/07/2012 05:24

Properly awake thrashing about and hysterical.

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Original poster

Alabama100 · 30/07/2012 05:27

She has been sleeping through since 6.5 months, I can't work out why she is like this now. Ny head is banging ny eyes hurt. I feel like screaming at the top of my lungs! Milk and bringing her in bed was the last resort and that hasn't worked. She's still hystetical.

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Grumpla · 30/07/2012 05:29

X-posted with you there OP.

If you are crying yourself then she will be picking up on your distress.

I'm not saying this to be mean but you need to get it together now. One bad nights sleep does NOT mean she is going to revert to a newborn sleep pattern. Sleep deprivation is a bitch (my day started at 4am, just like most days... I find it almost impossible to get back to sleep once it is light) but remember it won't kill you and it's not forever.

It sounds as though you are on your own? Is there someone who you can call in a few hours to make a plan with? I find it so muh easier to cope with tiredness if i know i have a guaranteed chunk of sleep coming up (even just an hours nap three days down the line!)

Please, please try and stop crying. In the short term your little girl needs you to show her that she is safe, that she can go to sleep, that you are with her.

In the long term, are you OK apart from tonight? You sound like you are at the end of your tether pet. That's not somewhere you end up just after one bad night.

Original poster

Alabama100 · 30/07/2012 05:29

I just can't go back to those bad old days of 2 hours broken sleep a night. I was on the brink of depression from it.

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Grumpla · 30/07/2012 05:30

Your OH is being a fucking twat.

Grumpla · 30/07/2012 05:33

Two hours of broken sleep a night is horrible - but that was when she was a newborn, right?

She is not going to revert back to that permanently, pet. She really isn't.

THIS TOO SHALL PASS.

But yeah your OH should be helping you. What kind of fucking arsehole doesn't respond to someone in the state you're in? I think you need to be having words from him in the morning.

Grumpla · 30/07/2012 05:33

From? With. Strong words.

Original poster

Alabama100 · 30/07/2012 05:35

grumpla its more than one night of no sleep I was dealing with 6.5 months if dd waking every 45 mins.i swear that is not even an exaggeration. I reached an all time low and would say on the brink of depression. Crying for hours on end a day, ill all the time. Theo did cc and everything changed for. 2 months 10-12 hours sleep s night. Am petrified of going back to the bad days.

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Original poster

Alabama100 · 30/07/2012 05:36

No grumpla it was 9 weeks to 6.5 months old.

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GnocchiNineDoors · 30/07/2012 05:39

I had a night like this last week and dd did eventually settle. However, she responded best to calm and.dh had to step in as by the earlyhours I.was stressed to high heaven.

Your oh is a twat to do what he is doing to you. Pick up the baby, and pace with him in you bedroom so that you and dh arr in this together.

Grumpla · 30/07/2012 05:55

Ok, I can see why you are worried but if she has been sleeping well for an extended period now then this one night tonight does not mean that is over forever. I also think your reaction to tonight shows that perhaps you are not 100% ok yourself. That doesn't mean I think you are not having a shit time - it does sound truly shit! - but that your reaction (crying, screaming etc) is maybe to more than this night IYSWIM.

You say you were "on the brink of depression" but (I say this as someone who has been depressed) what you are describing doesn't sound like "on the brink" at all. It sounds like you were (possibly still are?) really struggling.

Depression doesn't go away overnight and it's like a physical injury in that it takes you a while to heal, get stronger afterwards.

Have you spoken to someone in RL about the way you were / are feeling?

I still can't quite believe that your OH is being such a turd. It is NOT OKAY for him to behave like this.

I struggle with depression and insomnia - my DH does everything he can to support me. I sleep in the spare room a lot, he makes sure I nap if he is at home, he encourages me and tells me what a great job I am doing when I feel like a crap
Mum. If you have struggled alone with months of sleep deprivation and now tonight - I can see why you are feeling so awful and it is not your fault.

Being parents is a partnership. He needs to man up and start pulling his fucking weight.

If he won't support you is there a friend / family you could call today? Just to lie down and rest for an hour later might help you feel a bit more in control.

I'm sorry you are having such a grim time. Has she calmed down a bit? Any sign of a tooth?

Original poster

Alabama100 · 30/07/2012 08:32

Thank you so much for the support everyone esp you grumpla. She eventually fell asleep in m arms at 5.30pm after 2 hours of solid screaming I put her in her cot and she slept for 25 mins. She. Screamed for a bit more but now is chirpy as larry so can't be ill. Trying to check for a tooth but can't find one.

Just feels like cc doesn't really work once they're standing in which case I have no idea how I'm going to cope as I have no fall back plan.

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