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Parenting

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Original poster

newborn wanting to be held

60 replies

DizzyKipper · 06/07/2012 15:30

Help! I feel very out of my depth at the minute, could do with some advice.
It's day 3 of being completely on my own to look after our 2 week old girl and it's not been going so well. Everytime I've put her in the moses basket so I can try to get on with a bit of housework she's cried within a minute or 2, I think mainly it's because she wants to be held since I feed her, change as necessary and burp before putting her in. DH thinks I need to leave her to settle herself down since she has to learn she can't have attention all the time. I know she has to learn that eventually but is it right when she's only 2 weeks?
Would appreciate hearing about what other mums have done. I think part of the problem is that we've had so many visits and phone calls since she was born I haven't really even had time to think about what seems 'right' or found my feet as a mum and so am today just feeling particularly overwhelmed. The phone has now been unplugged though.

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

lilbreeze · 07/07/2012 00:04

Awww this thread is lovely! Who said Mumsnet is a vipers nest?

Becky2011 · 07/07/2012 08:34

Lovely poem. My nearly 7 mo has been happily playing for about 20 mins with a dvd box while I mn & she is cuddled lots, not clingy at all. Haha I am still not doing housework

Abra1d · 07/07/2012 08:43

Try walks with the pram or pushchair. Sometimes they stay asleep for a few precious minutes when you get home and you can make yourself some toast or throw clothes in rhe washing machine.

With my daughter I had a battery-operated rocking chair, which she loved. it gave me 20 minute slots to bath her toddler brother or give him his lunch.

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WrestlesBadgers · 07/07/2012 08:56

Honestly you should be on the couch snuggling your gorgeous bundle! If you absolutely must get up to say, make more tea and perhaps a hobnob or seven, you need either a ring sling, a wrap or an ergo. BB is bollocks, don't go there.

I still wear my 14 mo, and co-sleep, and she's a feisty, independent little thing.

GurlwiththeFrothyCurl · 07/07/2012 09:08

Just to cheer up all of those with Velcro babies. My DS1 was the Velcro baby of all time! For months and months he clung to me, wouldn't go to DH without howling, wouldn't let anyone other than me hold him. I had all the guff about ruining him from relatives. Nightmare!

Today, he came in for a long cuddle as I was having a lie in. Then he said to his Dad that he was ready for his lift to the railway station as he is going on one of his long trips. He loves travelling to nearby towns as this is his hobby. He hardly ever stays in. He is 22!

Enjoy your newborns and cuddle them as much as you can. I miss that time so much, but at least my two grown up lads are the cuddliest you could imagine :)

mummysmellsofsick · 07/07/2012 19:05

Oh and I meant to say, I used to get waylaid by baby sick and go and change my clothes and wash stuff, but gradually I learned to rub it in and go! Makes me laugh thinking I used to change my outfit

jaggythistle · 07/07/2012 19:24

baby wipes do a good quick sick removal. i still change my clothes (and DS2's) quite a lot, but not as much as with DS1!

is 'lower your standards' not general newborn survival tip?

Gooseysgirl · 07/07/2012 19:33

In a couple of weeks you can start trying out things like playmats etc but for now I second what everyone else has said. I am still using a BabyBjorn carrier (DD 4 months) and find it brilliant! Also DD has loved the Tiny Love classic mobile from 4 weeks old and even now will lie under it for up to an hour so I can get the basics done in the morning like having a shower!! My sister stayed with us for a week when DD was 4 weeks old and cooked for us, tidied etc and it was the most enormous help and I owe her BIG time

Wigglewoo · 07/07/2012 20:06

I have a 3 week old velcro ds. The only way I am surviving is swaddling. Then he thinks he's being held, I can sometimes put him down in the moses basket and make tea / do housework etc. I know some people say enjoy the cuddles but honestly I need to put him down and do things otherwise I will go insane.

I brought a pack of muslin swaddleme cloths from ebay and they are cool enough to wrap him up and stick a blanket on top (as long as tis shitty weather holds out). I find holding his arms down when I lie him down also helps as he thinks I'm holding him. He does wake up in a grump when he realises he's been tricked though!!

Coramum · 08/07/2012 14:19

A sling can help but speaking from experience it can result in a baby that can't be put down without crying. You could try for one nap a day in the basket which would at least give you a chance to rest properly for an hour or two but leaving lots of time for holding and cuddles too over the rest of the day. Someone else has mentioned the baby whisperer routine and I'd suggest giving it a go. You need to rest too, don't forget.
Make good use of the pram, its great if she can get used to sleeping in it as you can get out and about at least.

I wasn't keen to get my 3 week old into a routine but i now have an 8 wk old that won't go in the pram, basket or car seat or be put down at all without lots of crying. This can literally mean carrying her 12 hours a day and even going to the loo with her in the sling! i wish i'd started the baby whisperer routine from 2 weeks as its now an uphill battle (and my back is killing me..). Routines aren't necessarily bad, they can help your baby sleep and feed properly. Good luck, hope you're hanging in there.

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